Snack-Boy Tournaments Will Conquer the Universe!

[johnnyhearts]

Greetings Racked-Off Tilters and Geeks of 2+2,

Has everybody grown bored of the glut of huge, dumb, goofball tournaments yet? When those true leisure boys of the world, with hearts and minds, arrive at the realization that the glory days of tournament play are over I, Johnny Hearts, have a glorious suggestion.

The Snack-Boy tournament! What, you ask with fervent interest and curiousity, is a Snack-Boy tournament. I will tell you, you bunch of railed whiners and future snackers. It is a small (one table max) tournament in which the first chump to go broke must walk to the nearest convenience market and purchase snack items for the other gloating participants. He must be insulted brutally. You may choose to follow the goof in a car and taunt him rudely as he walks. This is the only true spirited action left in these desperate times of a once great game that has been insidiously taken over by dummies.

Perhaps this tournament structure will someday be featured on ESPN or the Travel Channel. Wouldn't we all love to see the overrated baby, Hellmuth, walking to a 7-11 with Sam Grizzle barking at him from a pickup truck. Hellmuth can then sheepishly deliver Sam a delicious malt liquor and some jerky. Maybe Hellmuth will "look into Sam's soul" and realize that Mr. Grizzle would actually prefer a pepper jerky?

Try it in your homegames gentlemen of leisure. Make poker enjoyable again. Let's take the game back from these pompous palookas.

Get me my snack, Punk,

Johnny Hearts

[Sundevils21]

rack it [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[luckycharms]

Hahahaha. Very funny. Love the Helmuth sarcasm. It's so true