How offensive is this?

bobman0330 · #1 10-17-2005, 10:52 AM

I was speaking to the front-desk worker at my building yesterday evening because I had locked my keys in my apartment. She gave me the spare set to get back in and retrieve them. After returning them, she began asking me about school (I only had my school ID on me at the time). She asked about tuition and all sorts of stuff. Turns out she (a black woman, had a strong accent, so I assume she was an immigrant) is a nursing student at Montgomery Comm. College who was transferring to Howard and was worried about the increased tuition. I told her what I could. As we were concluding the conversation, she said, "It seems like you're doing very well. I'm sure you'll be successful because you're white." She mistook my stare for incomprehension of her accent, so she helpfully explained, "You know, you're white, not black, so it's easy for you to excel."

How offensive is this, if at all?

SheetWise · #2 10-17-2005, 10:58 AM

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How offensive is this, if at all?

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She already has her crutch -- so when she stumbles, she'll be prepared. It's offensive she was taught to believe this, and it's sad she believed it.

coffeecrazy1 · #3 10-17-2005, 11:22 AM

Seems to me to be equally offensive as the underlying statement of modern affirmative action: you are a minority, and are unable to perform at the same level as whites, so we will lower the standards for you.

#4 10-17-2005, 11:26 AM

You want to be offended because she recognizes that a native white person has an economic advantage over a black immigrant?

I'm sure as she spends more time in the US, she'll realize the more complex nuances of race relations, but to recognize that white people generally have it easier than black people is neither controversial nor offensive.

tek · #5 10-17-2005, 11:58 AM

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I'm sure as she spends more time in the US, she'll learn to use the Race Card more subtley but simultaneously more often.

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FYP

#6 10-17-2005, 12:25 PM

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You want to be offended because she recognizes that a native white person has an economic advantage over a black immigrant?

I'm sure as she spends more time in the US, she'll realize the more complex nuances of race relations, but to recognize that white people generally have it easier than black people is neither controversial nor offensive.

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She is definitely racist and you are naive if you don't think she is. She didn't say that statistically whites make more income, she said that since you are white you will be sucessful.

I would be offended if she said that to me just as I would expect a black person to be offended with me if I said "You will be successful because you can be a rapper/basketball player/olympic sprinter."

#7 10-17-2005, 12:44 PM

My first take was that I probably would have been offended. As I thought more about it and what you tell us about her, I've changed my mind.

She apparently is reasonably well educated. (assuming you're pretty closely quoting her) She definitely wants to learn and she's decided she can learn more somewhere else. She's been exposed to only one view of Black/White relations in the US.

If it were me, I'd go back and talk more to her. I'd explain how I'd reacted to her comment. I'd explain my personal feelings toward Blacks. I'd let her see that not all Whites are a**h***s. I'd offer her friendship and any help I could.

I'd encourage her to tell me about the difficulties she's experiencing because of her skin color or immigrant status. I'd hope to learn from her experiences.

She could learn from me that my life isn't all hunky-dory, peachy-keen just because I'm White. I'd tell her the problems I've encountered and how I set about overcoming them.

Maybe, just maybe, a small change in one of this country's worst problems can happen. At least in the case of you two.

tek · #8 10-17-2005, 12:49 PM

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She could learn from me that my life isn't all hunky-dory, peachy-keen just because I'm White. I'd tell her the problems I've encountered at the poker table getting sicked out on every night.

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FYP

#9 10-17-2005, 12:49 PM

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She is definitely racist and you are naive if you don't think she is.

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Christ! Naive? That's a bit harsh. Simmer down.

I don't really want to start an argument here, I honestly want your opinion. When did it start being naive to think whites have it easier than blacks? At one point, it wasn't a naive belief

And sticking to the general use of the term, I don't think she was being 'racist.' What I do consider racist is my mother having to resign because she refused to write a circled 'B'(demanded by her boss) on the top of applications handed in by black applicants. This was a few years ago. That's racism.

ACPlayer · #10 10-17-2005, 12:55 PM

I would not be offended if someone made a comment about my chances of success or failure based on my race (in fact I have heard such comments in the past). I dont think one should be offended by a frank statement of views or feelings.

I recognize that racism is prevalent in human society.

I recognize that many blacks and minorities still do not have the same chances for success as some other races.

I recognize that it is sad for a person to believe and feel how she feels as it will hamper her efforts to succeed.