[Aloysius]

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I just don't get this. It's entirely possible that I have been exceedingly lucky in working at abnormally nurturing environments but I don't buy it. One thing I was taught very early on is to carefully manage your boss, i.e. make sure you both have the same understanding for what you are doing and what you want to do and all of that. I think what I'm reading here is that most people aren't even trying to do that.

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I'm curious Sf'er what industry do you work in?

I've worked in i'banking, venture, now entertainment (all fairly cutthroat industries), so my personal suspicions of how "nurturing" a work environment are colored by this.

However - I have friends in a wide variety of industries - and from academia, to technology, to consulting... never, ever heard that the default work state is "nurturing".

Most people (co-workers whatever) are pretty self-interested. Succeeding in corporate america = someone else not succeeding. It's competition. How is it possible to have such a wholesome, nurturing environment at a work place? I find it difficult to imagine this truly existing.

Oh - and yeah - managing upwards is a really good thing to try and do. But I've found that it's much less about creating an understanding with your boss (for the greater good of the company) but much more about self-preservation and other selfish motives.