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the 3-bet is to get this heads up or 3-way and to win the pot when we both miss. say he has an ace and the flop is J95. if he holds A6/A7/A8/AT he will have a hard time continuing.

3-betting is surely better than coldcalling, which in my opinion is the -EV option. folding is 0 EV, and reraising is probably just a little bit on the positive side.

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I really doubt coldcalling is -EV here, and I actually prefer it to 3-betting. I kind of think that against someone this aggressive we are likely the ones that are going to be put to the test if we both miss.