[Warik]

I have no intention of being rude or unprofessional, and it has nothing to do with burning bridges... I'm just not like that and I won't do it.

However, I don't see how this can go in such a way that will get me a good reference later. It's a tiny company and is in the worst shape it has ever been and I, a key player, am jumping ship. Even if it keeps running after I'm gone he's gonna hate me for it. Yeah, legally he can't say "he was the worst employee I ever had, don't hire him" but he also can't be legally obligated to say "he's the best employee ever. I'd hire him on the spot any day of the week."

Plus, I want to leave even if I don't have another job ready. I'd rather live off my savings and job hunt with no other obligations than stay here until I find something else. (live at home so being without work for a month is no problem). I don't see how you can tell someone "I'd rather make less / make nothing than work for you" in a polite way and not piss them off.

Any of you ever had a former employer you knew would give you a bad reference and instead you gave a coworker as a reference saying they were your superior? A former employee was a manager directly below me and is willing to give me a reference (as am I to him, as he was fired very unprofessionally), could that work in the worst case scenario or will it likely bite me on the ass?