So the whole thing start after stealing 48 closed wine bottles and a number of open ones from a UNLV function... the closed ones are safely squirreled away, but the open ones must be consumed. I pour myself a nice big glass of wine at home to celebrate the heist.
While sitting on the floor (because I moved my chair into my bedroom to create a distraction-free poker environment) the f'ing rabbit
(link) comes hopping over and upsets the glass because she is a lush. While the house owner, who happens to be sitting on the couch, flips out about the mess, the f'ing rabbit is sucking the booze out of the carpet.
I decide to rent a carpet cleaner from the grocery store. On the one block of Tropicana between my house and the store, I get pulled over for having expired CA tags in Nevada. This is wonderful because the CA DMV cashed my check
two months ago yet I still have not recieved the new tags, nor [according to the rare non-dick cop ("Got anything I should know about... pipes, guns..." "No sir" "Good" No further questions... because I don't like cops poking around my truck without probable cause, which refusing a search is not... and btw there is actually nothing illegal in there because I'm not a f'ing [censored] like apparently everyone who works for the CA DMV) who pulled me over] have they actually updated their database to show that they've taken my money. After waiting for 15 minutes with wine stains setting in my carpet at home, I get let go with a f'ing ticket and
still have to go rent the carpet cleaner
and clean my entire f'ing carpet while that ungreatful rodent cleans her f'ing ears in her cage, which is still really f'ing adorable.
Anyway, at least I had 48 bottles of wine to ease the pain.