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Old 10-10-2005, 02:16 AM
Edge34 Edge34 is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Eagan, MN
Posts: 255
Default Re: Best SNL Commercials, Round One

Where the hell is Uncle Jemima's pure mash liquor?

Uncle Jemimah: Do you like drinkin'? Well, if you're like me - you like to get bit just as fast as possible. That's why I'm proud to introduce, to you, Uncle Jemimah's Pure Mash Liquor. I'm Uncle Jemimah. You probably know my wife, Aunt Jemimah, the Pancake Lady. Now, she says that sellin' booze is degradin' to our people. I always say that black folk ain't exactly swellin' up with pride on account of you flippin' flapjack! Then she say, "Why booze?" I says, "Sell what you know", and I know about booze. Uncle Jemimah's Pure Mash Liquor has a 95% alcohol content, and that's per volume. That means you get f**ked up for less money!

Aunt Jemimah: [ exits house banging pot ] Pancakes is ready!

Uncle Jemimah: Aw, you shut up, Woman! You not gonna ruin this for me! [ swats at cartoon birds flying around him ]

Sammy: [ playing checkers ] Whatchoo swattin' at?

Announcer: Uncle Jemimah's Down-Home Mash Liquor. More fun that pancakes.

Uncle Jemimah: [ running through yard swatting cartoon birds and kicking cartoon pigs ] I just want to make liquor..!
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