[bobbyi]

First hand: I would fold preflop. On the flop, I would try to check-raise and trap everyone for two bets right here (since you now UTG is LAG and will bet). Don't worry too much about being outkicked. With the K out there, even if the case 9 is out, kickers often won't play. These really aren't "live vs. online" issues as much as they are issues about knowing your opponents. It is certainly possible online to (for example) know that someone is a LAG and you need to play accordingly.

Second Hand: Raise the flop with all the people in there and you having such a strong draw. Definitely bet the turn. Your tell on BB is a silly reason to check. Even if you knew she was afraid of the flush and was going to fold, there are other people in there to pay you off, and she might not pay off the river anyway. There is no reason to think that you won't get action if you bet. People will bet lots of stuff on the button when everyone checks to you. There is no reason for them to put you on the flush.

Overall, it sounds like you are thinking critically about your plays and considering your opponents. That is very important and will take you far. However, I think some of the specific plays you made were not so great.