[Big Bend]

So I'm driving home at 2am from a [censored] game, enjoying a little ganja in my wooden pipe (please I drive just fine while stoned - MUCH better than my wife ever will sober). Suddenly whirling lights flash behind me. [censored]! I drive an old Jeep Wrangler with a rag top and plastic windows, drive ahead a little and pull over, while trying to cram my stuff into my pocket. I'm paranoid the cop is gona smell something, so as soon as I stop I get out of the jeep and walk to the police car, hoping to meet him half way.. but as soon as I step out the cop gets on the intercom and tells me to return to my vehicle. Thank goodness a big coldfront was blowing thru as I sat in the jeep with the door open by the time he showed up to ask for my license the winds had blown away all evidence. I know I appeared nervous tho, chewing gum and all (trying to hide pot breath) and he gets suspicious. Tells me I was doing 46 in a 35 which is BS cause I never speed when I'm smoking while driving. Then he starts asking if I've been drinking. "No sir" I truthfully replied, quite stoned at the time. He takes my license/insurance back to his car..

Meanwhile I realize my pipe has fallen out of my pocket, is somewhere on the floor of the Jeep, and I can't find it (no interior lighting). [censored]! Cop comes back asks me to step out of the vehicle, says he wants to find out if I've been drinking, leads me back and does a field sobriety test, which I easily pass with flying colors. "You ain't been drinking" the cop says handing me back my license and wishing me a good night.

Whew that was CLOSE! First I buy enough time to air out the jeep, then I don't get searched, then I don't get a ticket.. no jail.. nothing. scary! Went home and smoked a bunch more to calm down.

Moral to the story - don't drink and drive - but if you can handle your weed you'll be able to easily pass sobriety tests.

L8r... BB