[The Don]

For anyone who plays me on a regular basis, I have decided to do you all a favor and write out a step-by-step guide on how to stack me in levels 1 and 2. Be sure to put it in you notes.

Step 1: Preflop play

Be sure to limp with small pairs at all times. This is probably the best way to stack me. Here is an example:

***** Hand History for Game 2827022547 *****
NL Texas Hold'em $50 Buy-in + $5 Entry Fee Trny:16338056 Level:2 Blinds(15/30) - Tuesday, October 04, 23:21:01 EDT 2005
Table Table 12196 (Real Money)
Seat 5 is the button
Total number of players : 10
Seat 1: gator2854 ( $1012 )
Seat 2: vblifer ( $210 )
Seat 3: TOMCULATER ( $915 )
Seat 4: dhende3 ( $998 )
Seat 5: daaplaya ( $805 )
Seat 6: Lucki4me ( $930 )
Seat 7: Pokertocash ( $930 )
Seat 8: briansfv ( $1795 )
Seat 9: kgthepro ( $1085 )
Seat 10: AlwysEnuff ( $1320 )
Trny:16338056 Level:2
Blinds(15/30)
** Dealing down cards **
Dealt to dhende3 [ Kc Ac ]
briansfv calls [30].
kgthepro folds.
AlwysEnuff folds.
gator2854 folds.
vblifer folds.
TOMCULATER folds.

When I raise 4x, make sure to call getting 2.1 to 1 even though you are playing for set value and the odds of hitting your set are roughly 7.3 to 1.

dhende3 raises [120].
daaplaya folds.
Lucki4me folds.
Pokertocash folds.
>You have options at Table 19586 Table!.
briansfv calls [90].


Step 2: The Flop

This is the most important part, I cannot emphasize this enough... HIT YOUR SET. If you cannot hit your set then you are a failure and should probably quit poker. Also, you should probably make sure that I get a piece with my AK or that I am holding an overpair on an uncoordinated board.

** Dealing Flop ** [ Th, Ad, 3d ]

If you limped with a really inconspicuous pair like 33 then that is even better. The fact that there is also a flush draw out there really helps your odds too.

briansfv checks.
dhende3 bets [200].
briansfv raises [400].
dhende3 is all-In [678]
briansfv calls [478].

Ah, the check-you're already pot-committed if you call so either move in or make a hard as hell fold min-raise. Brilliant move. Here you have basically told me that you have a monster hand. Since you know that I consider the majority of online poker players idiots, there is no way I can put you one anything but a weaker Ace or a flush draw (even though you have basically informed me of your set). Watch as I move in and proceed to give you my chips.

** Dealing Turn ** [ 4h ]
** Dealing River ** [ 4d ]
briansfv shows [ 3s, 3h ] a full house, Threes full of fours.
dhende3 shows [ Kc, Ac ] two pairs, aces and fours.
briansfv wins 2041 chips from the main pot with a full house, Threes full of fours.
dhende3 finished in tenth place.
dhende3 has left the table.


Step 3: Using my chips

When using my chips I suggest that you play the exact way as you did before. For one, disregard pot odds, they are unimportant (make sure to play small pairs at ANY cost). Next, HIT YOUR SETS, your entire strategy has been rendered obsolete if fail to do this. Finally, make sure to go with the ultra tricky check min-raise. This is smart because if I have KK-JJ, you have allowed me to get away from my hand by making the strength of yours so obvious. No matter though, you are 200 chips richer and you played your set in the very fashionable manner similar to what you saw on TV.



Note: This was not a bad beat post or a serious post at all... IT WAS SATIRICAL. I know a lot of people silently curse out themselves/opponent in situations like this so I thought I would poke a little fun at it.