[pretender2k]

1. Get Viagra or Better Than Viagra - Well for one I am only 35 and have been married for 14 years. I don't have a problem getting it up, the only problem I have is getting IT. I hope someday I will need viagra because that will mean I am getting IT more than I am now.

2. Enlarge Your Breasts Naturally - Well as interesting as that is and it may kind of help with the problem presented in the first dilemma, I think I will pass. I would probably never get to work on time since I am kind of a breast man and I may spend to much time admiring my own if I had them.

3. Make Money From Your Computer - Well I'd make more if I spent less time deleting these emails and more time playing poker.

4. Get Cialis - I don't take drugs that I don't now what they do and probably have so many side effects that are somewhat undesirable. I always likes the one that made your toenails looks better but may cause liver problems. I used to drink a lot so I think I'll keep the bad toenails and leave the liver alone. For more information on side effects see Robin Williams "Live on Braodway."

5. Get Valium Over The Net - Now here's a drug that I know what it does and could actually use occasionally during those bad runs of cards but since we have random drug testing at work and I am already on a bad streak of luck let's not play with fire.

6. Refinance My Home - Refinance my home hell, with my fabulous credit I can't finance on in the first place. Why do you think I spend all my spare time grinding away at the poker tables. It's the only second income I can find that works around the random schedule my primary job gives me.

I am currently getting between getting between 800 and 1200 emails a day. So did I miss any? Oh and don't even bad talk the meat here because I love artificially flavored meat by-products so don't go there.