[BAK]

Last year:

I had watched Fossilman win the WSOP in September and thought it looked like a lot of fun.

Bought a book (Lou Krieger’s Hold ‘Em Excellence and another book because it was only $5) and read it. Played on the play money tables at PokerRoom with a sticky on my monitor of the hand rankings. Read the Pokah forums.

Figured out how to get money from my credit card onto Party Poker and started playing NL. Lost that money. Got a Neteller account and reloaded. Lost that money.

One year ago:

Read SSHE over the Thanksgiving holiday. Started playing limit and was breaking even.

Discovered STT and MTTs and lost my money. Reloaded.

Started reading 2+2.

Won 2 small buy-in MTT’s on Prima in one week. Decided I was a tournament player. J Went to Vegas for my birthday in March. Came in 3rd in two live tournaments I played in Vegas. Won 4 tourneys in AC from March to May (including a chop in a Ladies event). Was sure I was a tournament player. :O Played in two events at the WSOP – the Ladies event which I did OK in (110 out of 601) and an open event, where I was pwned! Have barely made it to the money in a few of the online MTTS I have played lately. Had to reload several times. Decided I had been very lucky and have a lot to learn about being a winning MTT player.

Played some STTs and enjoyed them. Read the AM guide and took the general advice here to play $11’s instead of $6’s. Managed to make a little profit until I had a long string of OOTM loses. Decided I was no good at them and it wasn’t fun to lose.

Bounced around playing all kinds of things - $25 NL, Omaha 8, Stud, MTTs. Reloaded some more.

Now:

Have an extensive poker library, which I have read, but apparently have not absorbed.

I got tired of reloading online. Decided to give myself an actual BR rather than just assume I would reload when I went broke. Stopped playing MTTs except for an occasional $5 + .

Started playing STTs seriously. Was up then down playing the $11s so I went to the $6s to get back to even. Am now up playing the $11s but my ROI is about 3% and my ITM is only 33%.

I am reading 2+2 and am starting to understand what I should be doing. I need to start getting more of a thrill from making the correct play. Now I am getting a lot of enjoyment from my successful bluffs and suck outs, in addition to my correct plays that work out for me. Unfortunately, I think I actually enjoy being berated as a fish – although since Party has blocked the railbird chat, I don’t get it as much as I used to. I do get the most enjoyment in being berated when I have actually played correctly – that is the best of both worlds!!

I tell myself I am not a donk, but in reality, I am afraid that I am. I have never given anyone my screen name because I hate to think what kinds of notes people might have on me.

Going forward:

I want to stop being a donk.

I want to develop some second level thinking as I play. (I have so far to go, second level is as far as I am aiming for at this time.)

I want to think about the odds more often and in more depth, rather than as an occasional justification for making a call I want to make anyway.

I want to figure out a way to become a good poker player.

I want to become good enough and confident enough to actually contribute in these forums.