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A pirate, a cowboy, and a samurai walk into the room. You have to kill one, marry one, and [censored] one. What are your choices, and why?

The pirate is not allowed to be Johnny Depp, and they can be of whatever gender would float your boat the most.

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Very interesting scenario. I think I'll kill the pirate and take all his goods and become rich.

I'd [censored] a cowgirl. Don't know if I can from your OP, but I assume a cowboy and cowgirl can be interchangeable and I don't see nothing wrong with [censored] a cowgirl.

I guess that leaves me with marrying a samurai. I assume there's female samurai's out there somewhere, hopefully some hot ass one.