[xorbie]

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The in-laws also like to focus on thwarting me to the extent that someone ends up being forgotten about and is allowed to build up points/tiles/cards and winning almost by default. Am I going to be screwed over something fierce when they ally against me in this game?

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Yes, if they do it well enough. If nobody ever trades you any resources and they trade within themselves to cut you off from key expansions/ports/longest road/largest army you are basically screwed.