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I was in high school when I went out for like a 4 mile jog and as soon as I hit the 2 mile mark, I had to [censored], so I stopped running, but I knew that if I walked, I wouldn't be able to make it home in time to not [censored] myself, so I'd start running, but that just made me have to [censored] more, so I just didn't know what to do. I debated just stopping on the side of the road and just shitting on the curb, but seriously, who the [censored] would do that? So I walked, in that kind of "I have to [censored], so I'm clenching my ass cheeks, but I'm trying to walk really fast, so I look like a black guy making fun of the way white people walk" walk, when all of a sudden, I felt what I thought was a fart coming out, so I said "OK, maybe that'll relieve some pressure," but no, I [censored] myself, and i just didn't know what to do, so I just walked home with this huge load in my pants, and it was the single most disgusting moment of my life.

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this one had me laughing out loud, PooBoy .

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