[StellarWind]

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A family lawyer is probably not the right person to see. Lawyers are professional adversaries. Their job is to fight for your interests. Of course, some lawyers are skilled compromisers, but far too many are just out to win.


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Al, I like most of your advice but not this. OP is afraid that his son is going to wind up in the custody of a mentally ill person who is "fairly abusive". He also fears losing his own financial future.

The only person who can help him understand his options for solving these problems is a good lawyer. He has a moral obligation to protect his son from abuse. As for ignoring the financial risk to himself, let's just say that's a worse EV play then all my poker mistakes combined.

A lawyer works for his client. He isn't going to war unless OP tells him to. The first thing the lawyer is going to do is explain the options and OP really needs that right now.

None of this precludes getting joint counseling with a mental health professional. It's not an either/or situation.

OP might also benefit from individual counseling. He has a lot to deal with right now and a professional might help him figure out what he wants or teach him methods for coping with his wife's illness/behavior.

PS: Bob, are you in danger? You don't specify what type of abuse you are facing. It is very common for women to physically abuse their mates and it sometimes leads to murder. Don't let misplaced shame or stupid stereotypes prevent you from taking care of yourself.