[Exsubmariner]

God (or the concept thereof) evolves with the human mind. Religions, as all other institutions, that are intractable perish and so do their gods. In terms of journey of the individual soul, I can only speak for myself. I have travelled over much of the globe in my time. I have seen men use any and every excuse including their religion to do the evil that is in them. I have been subjected to unbridled bigotry by the mere fact that I am an American, much less my skin color or that I was raised a protestant. Some people are shackled by the belief systems they are taught from birth. Others overcome them. I chose not to be shackled by a religion for many of the reasons that you state. I have found it to be a near useless tool in my quest for understanding the universe and the man I am.
I feel God will understand. I feel most of humanity will not. But they don't really count in this do they? I believe truely that God, if he even cares judge me, will judge me by my actions and by my heart and I doubt he will care what alter I kneel at or whose collection plate I fill, if any. If he does not, than he is not God.
Why you grapple with this and post so much about it I don't know.