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Would have to be a tie between the following:

1. Falling asleep behind the wheel of my ex-girlfriend's car on the Taconic Parkway when I was sixteen. We had been up all night arguing and I drove her from MA to LaGuardia because - this is brilliant - she had to fly to France for a funeral. So I fell asleep on the way back about 3 miles from my exit, woke up as I went off the road and cut the wheel at the last instant, scraped a guardrail, fishtailed around the road for a while and came to a stop. Wake up an instant later and I have a steering column in my guts. Fun stuff.

2. Having my current girlfriend's psychotic boyfriend break into my house and attack me with a chef's knife. Snuck in and pounced on me as I lay drunk on the couch, while the girl I was with was in the bathroom. The couch was folded out and we were watching a movie. The knife went into my shoulder as a pushed it against my throat, but luckily my hand was near my throat and I caught the blade of the knife on the edge of my hand, near my pinkie. I had to wrest the knife from his hands by pushing against the blade, at which point he settled right down and bolted. Driving away from my house the bastard totaled his car and ran off into the woods.

NT