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-   -   Are kids -EV? (http://archives2.twoplustwo.com/showthread.php?t=403538)

coffeecrazy1 12-22-2005 04:13 PM

Are kids -EV?
 
I read somewhere that, while marriage is supposed to be good for you, both healthwise and financially, having kids is not.

So, that leaves me to wonder:

Is having kids a -EV activity?

4_2_it 12-22-2005 04:15 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
I predict that if you procreate it will be -EV for the rest of us.

MonkeeMan 12-22-2005 04:15 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
no, who else will put you in a nursing home?

12-22-2005 04:15 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
It's based on your personality and temperment. There's times I want to sell them into slavery, and times I wouldn't trade them for anything else in the world.

*shrug*

Ray

man 12-22-2005 04:16 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
depends on how you define value. most people I know don't regret it.

diebitter 12-22-2005 04:18 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
TO me, kids are +++++++EV.

To you, who the hell knows but you?

TheMetetron 12-22-2005 04:20 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
To me, at least for the forseeable future, they are.

But no one can really tell you except for you.

If you are talking about money-wise, of course they are.

roxtar 12-22-2005 04:21 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
Kids = +EV

Dantes 12-22-2005 04:29 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
[ QUOTE ]
depends on how you define value. most people I know tell me they don't regret it.

[/ QUOTE ]

12-22-2005 04:29 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
Its a cult! Dont fall for it! Now that their life is over they want to drag anyone else then can with them! Dont do it!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v4...401/booger.jpg

[censored] 12-22-2005 04:32 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
It's been a positive experience for me, as far as I can tell of course. Depends on the person perhaps

poboy 12-22-2005 04:36 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
Depends on how you define value. From a financial and health perspective I'd say they are obviously -EV. From a happiness in life perspective I'd say for some they are very much +EV and for others less so. I'm not so sure about marriage though. True there is additional income but you also need twice as much of everything, not to mention the crap you don't need that she buys anyways. I guess it comes down to how you define "value".

Los Feliz Slim 12-22-2005 04:36 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
You know those days when it's nearly impossible to find any meaning or purpose anywhere? Having a kid helps with that. A lot.

vexvelour 12-22-2005 04:41 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
I want to have a kid, but I want to make sure I'm out of school before I do. [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

lu_hawk 12-22-2005 04:41 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
very positive from an evolutionary standpoint.

henrikrh 12-22-2005 05:08 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
Having kids cannot be given an expected value ebcause teh variables are huge and far too numerous. Could go big either way, but it is a high risk proposition and not to be made lightly.

gobboboy 12-22-2005 05:11 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
Not -EV. Just VERY high variance.

Bluffoon 12-22-2005 05:15 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
[ QUOTE ]
I read somewhere that, while marriage is supposed to be good for you, both healthwise and financially, having kids is not.

So, that leaves me to wonder:

Is having kids a -EV activity?

[/ QUOTE ]

Heh for me it's been the exact opposite. Marriage wasn't very good for me but my kid is great for me. Get anything you want to get done for you first because after you have kids their needs (should?... well they do anyway) take priority over yours.

I vote +EV

LittleOldLady 12-22-2005 08:57 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I read somewhere that, while marriage is supposed to be good for you, both healthwise and financially, having kids is not.

So, that leaves me to wonder:

Is having kids a -EV activity?

[/ QUOTE ]

Heh for me it's been the exact opposite. Marriage wasn't very good for me but my kid is great for me. Get anything you want to get done for you first because after you have kids their needs (should?... well they do anyway) take priority over yours.

I vote +EV

[/ QUOTE ]

I agree. My marriage was a disaster, and I am happy to be free of it. My kid, OTOH, is a world class joy, and having and raising him was the best thing I ever did. He was (very) expensive, but I got my money's worth. That said, I have known other kids who have given their parents nothing but grief, but in many (most?) cases less than optimal parenting had something to do with that.

BigBaitsim (milo) 12-22-2005 09:53 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
+EV.

Exceptionally high variance.

12-22-2005 09:55 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
-EV on your wife's figure.

Aloysius 12-22-2005 10:00 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
Banks2334 - Interesting thing I heard from my friend who had a baby in France:

French doctors are obsessed with ensuring the pregnant mother doesn't gain too much weight. Apparently, the more weight gained during pregnancy, the harder it is to lose afterwards. Advice for your wife - don't get fat, you only need 300 extra calories / day to sustain the fetus.

OP - without exception, every parent I know who has had a child has claimed it was lifechanging / amazing / highly recommends it. So there you go.

Skeptical,
-Al

WLVRYN 12-22-2005 11:02 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
The first 3-4 months are definitely -EV. Months 4-10/11 are about EV neutral. Months 10/11 and up, way positive, especially once they start walking and talking.

sublime 12-22-2005 11:03 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
i think getting dogs is a better idea

LittleOldLady 12-22-2005 11:27 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
[ QUOTE ]
Banks2334 - Interesting thing I heard from my friend who had a baby in France:

French doctors are obsessed with ensuring the pregnant mother doesn't gain too much weight. Apparently, the more weight gained during pregnancy, the harder it is to lose afterwards. Advice for your wife - don't get fat, you only need 300 extra calories / day to sustain the fetus.

OP - without exception, every parent I know who has had a child has claimed it was lifechanging / amazing / highly recommends it. So there you go.

Skeptical,
-Al

[/ QUOTE ]

There is an obligate weight gain in pregnancy of about 20-30 lbs (weight of fetus, placenta, amniotic fluid, enlarged uterus, and increased fluids). Gaining much more than 30 lbs is in general not the best. I myself gained only 8 lbs, and I lost some of that toward the end of the pregnancy. My newborn alone at 8.25 lbs weighed more than my weight gain. I was harangued throughout my pregnancy about not gaining enough weight (the first and last time that ever happened to me)--even though I ate exactly what was on my prescribed diet, no more and no less. The obstetrician scared the daylights out of me when he told me that my child would be retarded because I had failed to gain enough weight. Anyone who knows my son knows how far offbase the OB was. I still laugh about it. Nonetheless women should not be pressured to keep their weight gain below roughly 25 lbs.

Pregnancy does often make permanent changes in a woman's body, but this is not always a bad thing. I myself went up a cup size from C to D, and there are those who think that was a good thing.

And, yes, becoming a parent is absolutely life-changing. How could it be otherwise?

yoadrians 12-22-2005 11:48 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
-EV for my big-screen TV, DVD player, Computer, Computer mouse and sleep habits.

+EV in every other way, though. Wouldn't trade Max, my 15-month-old son, for anything in the world.

And, it's brought my wife and I even closer together, too, so I guess you could say it's been +EV for my 5-year-old marriage, too.

OtisTheMarsupial 12-31-2005 01:26 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
[ QUOTE ]
I read somewhere that, while marriage is supposed to be good for you, both healthwise and financially, having kids is not.

So, that leaves me to wonder:

Is having kids a -EV activity?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes, this is true. Statistically, marriage is good for your health and your financial well being (less so for your wife - in fact, marriage tends to be bad for women's health, though this is changing as marriage roles change).

Also, statistically, children tend to be bad for a relationship. Something like 60% of marriages get worse after a child and the others get better after a child.

The difference tends to be how involved the father is in the pregnancy and child rearing.

The traditional division of labor (wife does all housecleaning & childcare (unpaid labor), husband does all paid labor) tends to drive a wedge between a couple when the child comes.

Couples who have more equitable relationships tend to get stronger when they have children. Couples who have inequitable relationships tend to get weaker when they have children.

Check out Dr. John Gottman's books for more.

(Also, breastfeeding is really good at helping the mother lose her pregnancy weight. And it tends to make the baby healthier and smarter, too. And some guys like the look of engorged breasts - big!)

ghostface 12-31-2005 01:51 PM

Re: Are kids -EV?
 
I vote that EV is not involved in kids. I can't imagine a reason not to have one though.


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