Mall Trip Report
 

So I was walking around the mall doing a little Christmas shopping. I wander into some store and I see this sign: "$20 Every Jean".

Anyway some little teeny bopper who looks about 16 comes over and asks me if she can help with anything. I was in kind of a goofy mood so I said, "So if every jean is $20 off then every pair of jeans is $40 off right?"

She just gives me this completely confused look. She clearly has no idea what I'm talking about. I thought it was kinda funny so instead of just dropping it, I said it again. She still had no idea what I was talking about so I decide it wasn't as funny as I thought it was and decide to drop it.

Except that some other guy overheard me, and says, "Yeah, I thought the same thing." So he starts in on the poor girl. I thought he was kidding at first, but he keeps going on and on about getting $40 off. He demands to talk to the manager, who's only about 19 himself, and starts in on him about "false advertising". It becomes clear that the customer is maybe 5 IQ points brighter than the girl i had first talked to.

The poor manager kid was doing the best he could to calm the guy down, while explaining he couldn't give him $40 off on his jeans. Anyway, the guy was getting pretty beligerant, and all the kids working there were looking really nervous. One was standing with her hand on the phone like she was going to call security. So I walked out feeling pretty satisfied with the whole thing. Job well done.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

Having worked retail managment for 5 years I will tell you this, and it's not personal, and it goes for all shoppers:

1. Your jokes made to store employees are never funny.
2. Your jokes are especcially not funny when it's December and we are easily confused from being overworked.
3. (For the other guy) Grammar Errors are not false advertizing and no store will give you that.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
Grammar Errors are not false ADVERTIZING and no store will give you that.

[/ QUOTE ]

now that's funny

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
Anyway some little teeny bopper who looks about 16 comes over

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
I was in kind of a goofy mood so I said, "May I stick my fist in your vagina?

[/ QUOTE ]

FYP

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

So I was eating lunch, and then this guy said, "no way,"

and I was like "yes way,"

And then he said, "I'm going to sue you!"

And I said, "I'll counter-sue the pants off of you."

And then he was like, "You'd like that wouldn't you? You know, me, with my pants off? My pants no longer on? Me, naked?"

And I was like, "no way man."

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
Having eaten butter for eighteen years

[/ QUOTE ]

FYP

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
So I was eating lunch, and then this guy said, "no way,"

and I was like "yes way,"

And then he said, "I'm going to sue you!"

And I said, "I'll counter-sue the pants off of you."

And then he was like, "You'd like that wouldn't you? You know, me, with my pants off? My pants no longer on? Me, naked?"

And I was like, "no way man."

[/ QUOTE ]

I laughed

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]

2. Your jokes are especcially not funny because we work in the mall and are therefore minorities.

[/ QUOTE ]

FYP

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Grammar Errors are not false ADVERTIZING and no store will give you that.

[/ QUOTE ]

now that is indicative of a fat guido

[/ QUOTE ]

FYP

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

I wish that FiP gimmick account was still around

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

istewart
***
http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y19...unichxmas1.gif
Reged: 12/24/04
Posts: 7321
Loc: playing hands

FYT

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

It's time FYP started getting asterisks.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
It's time FYP started getting asterisks.

[/ QUOTE ]

Agreed. istewart's latest run was horrible.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

Watch it jake, this is seriously tipping over into non-funny old-man humor. You're on a slippery slope here and might easily segue into puns.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

This thread sucks.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
This thread really sucks.

[/ QUOTE ]

fyp!!!!!! omglolz.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Having worked retail managment for 5 years I will tell you this, and it's not personal, and it goes for all shoppers:

1. Your jokes made to store employees are never funny.
2. Your jokes are especcially not funny when it's December and we are easily confused from being overworked.
3. (For the other guy) Grammar Errors are not false advertizing and no store will give you that.

[/ QUOTE ]

I agree fully, and have nothing constructive or interesting to say

[/ QUOTE ]

FiP
<font color="white"> I promise to stay out of the strategy forums this time. </font>

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

i liked his FYPs here.

Also I think that if the employee is too ditzy to figure out what he said she should be laughed at.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
i liked his FYPs here.

Also I think that if the employee is too ditzy to figure out what he said she should be laughed at.

[/ QUOTE ]the thing is, even if the employee understood what he was talking about, he probably couldn't tell if jake was serious or not (a la other guy being serious...you never know). So when you can't tell if they're being serious or not, it's NOT best to assume they're joking.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

the manager i do feel bad because the other guy seemed like a dick for being serious about the $40. I meant the ditzy girl that was most likely clueless about the "pair" of jeans joke.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

This was a lot less interesting than the bar trip reports. [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

istewart is a genius, [censored] the haters.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

istewart's fyp here was genius. i seriously lost it when i read that. i'm snorting as i type this.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

i mean seriously folks. this is hilarious comedy 101. i'm still lolling and my gf thought it was hilarious too.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

[ QUOTE ]
Watch it jake, this is seriously tipping over into non-funny old-man humor. You're on a slippery slope here and might easily segue into puns.

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, yes. I figured that out after I said it and the girl just looked at me. My daughter has years of embarrassment ahead. Fortunately for me (and the rest of the spectators) the other guy ran with it. He made it funny. Hell I don't even remember what store it was after all that. Damn I'm getting old. Damn I hate the holidays.

edit: I started to put this in, then realized I didn't really want to bump this crappy thread, then realized I already had and didn't want to be accused of phantom bumping, so now i'm putting it back. Just let this thread die.

Re: Mall Trip Report
 

jake,

you are a weird guy. that is all.