I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

http://cardplayer.com/poker_magazine...php?a_id=14464

Why does CP PAY this guy to write this crap?

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

Because he now owns a big chunk of Cardplayer!!

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Of course, I went crazy. I shouted, “No!” and proceeded to flop myself on an empty adjacent table while staring straight up into space.

[/ QUOTE ]
He talks about this behavior like it is normal.

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

I thought the hand was over, but when my opponent studied awhile, I realized that he may actually play his hand. Thus, I started acting as weak as I could. I reached down deep and tried to send out a “weak tell” to fool him. My hands nervously caressed my face, and I tried to turn a bit white while thinking about the last big bluff I had made; I fooled myself into thinking I had 4-3 in the hole. I knew that talking would give away the strength of my hand, so I sat there trying to turn white while being as silent as a church mouse and simultaneously imagining that I was bluffing with 4-3 in my hand.


Could someone please send this guy a Caro's book of poker tells?

Greg

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

I think we should get a huge sympathy card, all sign it and send it off to him. That had to be the worst bad beat of all time. I'm sure nobody on these boards has ever suffered worse.

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

"I fully expected the last card to pair the board, as I believed I deserved to win the pot."

He is an idiot.

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

[ QUOTE ]
"I fully expected the last card to pair the board, as I believed I deserved to win the pot."

He is an idiot.

[/ QUOTE ]

[img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
"I fully expected the last card to pair the board, as I believed I deserved to win the pot."

He is an idiot.

[/ QUOTE ]
[img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

[/ QUOTE ]

OMFG. He has these things called "personal issues" in which he derives his own self worth from the falling of some cards. If he runs bad enough he, may just end his life.

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

Howdy all,

Okay, I read all your arguments, and I must say, fellas, you are all going too easy on the guy. I don't know how many of you are regular CP readers, but I recently got a subscription last November (I love this magazine!). Anyway, I can't remember the last time I saw a good article from him, if at all. Hellmuth is a good player, but he doesn't consider luck at all a part of the game. I'd like to introduce him to Mr. Variance!

Most of his articles he writes seem to be less about analysis or the tournament circuit (like Daniel Negreanu's), and more about "I got a bad beat, and you gotta hear this one, because I'm important." The sad thing about it is that this is a good article by Hellmuth standards! Have you seen him lately? He just finished up an 8-part (18 week-long) analysis of his win at the National Heads-Up Finals on NBC. It would be fine, if he talked about analysis of why he did what he did. But he just gives a freakin' narrative! What the hell!? What a self-aggrandizing punk!?

And to make matters even worse, he continues to throw hissy-fits any time he catches anything remotely close to a bad beat (including getting outplayed–remember the ESPN Tournament of Champions?). The next time he throws a hissy-fit during a televised event, someone should just hall off and send five speeding fingers right at his tonsils*. I mean, even at this point John McEnroe is saying "Shut up!" I got a bad beat today. Got all the money in with an overpair to the board on the flop (I had JJ). The other guy calls with an A8, and turns the ace, while a jack was not forthcoming on the river. I was not catching much anything in the line of cards, today, and was upset. But all I did was said in a deflated tone "That's bullcrap." Let off my token "Argh", and congratulated him on his good hand. I did this while everyone complimented the other guy on his great play. (They love to see me lose a hand because I traditionally dominate, and it's nice to see the #1 guy take a fall. Don't believe me? Who wants to see USC get smacked up on Saturday?) Anyway, I got over it and moved on! I know that I'm better than everyone in that particular circle, and I'll win it back (actually, I could also say that I've already won enough so that I was ahead at the moment). [censored] happens, and the guy's a nice guy. He helps me with computer stuff. So getting back on topic, I'd suggest Hellmuth follow the advice of Aristotle, "Quitchabitchin'". That was either Aristotle or a T-shirt I saw at a NASCAR race. Most likely the latter. Well, I'm done with the rant. Peace, out.

Rusty G.

P.S. I'd love to see Hellmuth respond to this one, because I've got an entire bag of "shut the hell up!" with his name all over it. Hey, new ad campaign, "Shut the Hellmuth Up!" [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Re: I know it\'s HIM, but seriously?
 

Wow Rusty, you really have an axe to grind with Phil.

How about we arrange a mud wrestling match between the two of you. May the biggest man boobs win!!!