Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

I know of a bouncer (working in the states) who had a knife pulled on him. the knifer was clearly nervous, so the bouncer did a karate stance (he didn't know karate) and said "all right, let's see what you got." dude dropped the knife and ran. I imagine something like this could work, but you never know with those crazy phillipenes.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

That was a much slicker move than I would have pulled off, while still being very intelligent.

To the people who think OP's a pussy: You're morans, and probably will die very, very soon.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
I know of a bouncer (working in the states) who had a knife pulled on him. the knifer was clearly nervous, so the bouncer did a karate stance (he didn't know karate) and said "all right, let's see what you got." dude dropped the knife and ran. I imagine something like this could work, but you never know with those crazy phillipenes.

[/ QUOTE ]

Now that is the right move if you have the gusto to pull it off.

Some other options
 

1. Reach a hand up to one ear and look down and to the side. Say, "abort! Abort!" Then look confused. Say, "No, no... Wait! No, Thursday..... Pause.... wait... OK, chicken.. Well no wait. operation gopher meatball? No, ok, Thursday." (put your hand up as in "please hold on") continue your insanity on your mike until something interesting happens or it dissipates.

2. When he pulls his butterfly knife out, you make with the pantomime butterfly knife. Then pantomime every action he makes until you get stabbed, and then pantomime stabbing him too, which won’t actually hurt him, since you have a fictitious knife.

3. Grab an onlooker on either side and smash their heads together knocking both unconscious, then regain eye contact with short knife wielding dude…. See what happens. If nothing happens, go to plan 1.

4. Poo and fling it at him. If you score a hit, you should run because he will stab you. You could also drop trow and just start pooing. This will make it too weird to stab you.

5. Run up and grab his hand and force the knife into some non-lethal part of your body. This will freak him out… Say, “finish me….. …. …. FINISH ME!!!!!!!!” And he will run away. This will actually work I feel sure of it!

6. He started speaking some other language? You start speaking another language. Booyah! what’s up now, little philipino dude? You gonna stab a dude that speaks Japanese? HAHAHHAHAHA, oh [censored], yes you are.

7. Make out with a nearby dude. This will make him confused about the fact that you were making out with his girl. Tell him you thought his girl was a dude. Reach for his girls crotch to verify.

8. Pantomime “stuck behind an invisible wall”

9. Say, I’m so sorry…. I’m so sorry. Then breakdance. If you can do the moonwalk, then do it. Because it’s like backing up, but better because no one REALIZES you’re backing up.

Re: Some other options
 

Ahahhahaha - My stomach actually hurts but that could be from the food poisoning too. Wow - the first 1 reminds me of an episode of hey arnold I saw a long time ago.

Re: Some other options
 

You owe me a new monitor. I woke my wife and kids up with my laughing!

Re: Some other options
 

beetz, that was amazing. there should be a rewards system for awesome posts like this.

Re: Some other options
 

This brought images to mind of the self-beating-up in Fight Club. Nice post.

Re: Some other options
 

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This brought images to mind of the self-beating-up in Fight Club. Nice post.

[/ QUOTE ]

Honestly, I'd run. But, if that wasn't an option, then really beating yourself up is the next best thing. Remember, he might not believe you if you just slug yourself in the gut, but if you punch yourself hard in the face and are spitting blood, he's gonna be pretty put out.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

shoot him in the dick?