A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

I'll try to keep this story brief but it is quite a strange one.

Background, I moved to China about 8mths ago and met a girl just over 6mths ago, things have gone well with her, we've been living together for about 3mths and obviously spend alot of time together (if someone offers later to host a picture of her I can email).

Anyway this month was our 6mth aniversary, which also coincided with her work holidays so we planned a nice holiday to her home town (she's from a small village originally and it was an amazing experience to see and live in more rural china). Anyway as part of this ofcourse came time to meet the parents, which isn't a big problem for me as i've dated chinese girls before and know that all you need to do to impress is eat like 4 bowls of rice and demonstrate your mastery of chopsticks.

On perhaps the second day of our holiday, her mother decides that we need to visit a Buddhist friend, monk(i'm not sure), to judge the strength of our relationship, not one to cause a scene I agree to go. I expect we will be arriving at a temple but it's actually just some ladies house with a small make shift prayer room.

As the lady takes us into her house and offers us sweets, oranges and some peculiar pickled ginger which is moist and salty I am aprehensive, I know that the mother places a bit of importance on this all. My girlfriend is led into the "prayer room", as the women begins to chant and light insense I feel the tension bouncing around the room, from a wonderful oil painting of Mao, to the scummy window outside which I can see someone has thrown there rubbish from one of the windows above. As the ceremony goes into full throw(sp) my girlfriend brings her hands together in the typical prayer fashion and....I realise for the first time in 6mths, she is missing the entire first knuckle of her middle finger....this is the most surreal moment of my life, i'm looking at the lady chanting i'm looking at her hands, I start to sweat, is this an omen???, am I forseeing something of religious importance, should I speak up, cry to the lord, don a robe and seclude myself in the shaolin mountains????? or have I just been really really ignorant of the fact for 6mths....I say nothing but keep glancing to be sure.

Anyway as the following days progress I am able to confirm that the finger portion is missing, the nail is gone.

Can anyone explain how this happened, I figure the window of confrontation is way way passed, I can't imagine how I can casually bring it up now, something like "did you cut of your finger and not tell me?" is probably not going to fly.

Anyway I eagerly await your advice.

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

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if someone offers later to host a picture of her I can email

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Imageshack

As for the finger thing, I don't really know what to say. Pretty weird and I think you've got to be pretty oblivious.

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

It's not good if you can't bring this up by just being honest and asking her.

http://www.adage.com/century/GRAPHICS/campaign_nike.jpg

and let us know what happens

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

dude it's just [censored] weird, i mean i've asked her about other small little scars on her body or personal things about her life, not to mention we have sex it's not like I don't think we can be intimate and share emotions, yada yada, but a finger and 6.5 months what am I meant to say....

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

"So, what happened to your finger?"

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

She is probably sensitive about it and hides it well. I would probably pretend i didn't notice and definitely wouldn't bring it up.

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

[ QUOTE ]
dude it's just [censored] weird

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ya man, it's definately weird... but I just don't see any other way you can approach it.

maybe someone is clever enough to think of a funny way to bring it up... i was thinking about the missing finger gag that you play on children...

but then I thought about it some more, and it's just morbid and wrong. Lame-o

gl

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

So, tell her you've been wondering about it all this time and didn't want to be rude and your curiosity has been driving you nuts...

Or, just don't mention it and try not to obssess about it. A missing fingertip is pretty easy to not notice...

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

if i understand correctly, from her knuckle upwards her finger is missing?

how could you not notice this? seriously, this is really weird.

Re: A 6 month Aniversary Present, I didn\'t expect...
 

have you considered giving her a Chinese finger trap?