Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

OK, so I'm semi-famous for laying some monster logs. My brother has exaggerated to friends about my abilities, implying such things as me "saving it up" for 2 weeks at a time. This is not true, but for an averaged sized individual, I've laid some monster logs. 6'0" 185 pounds. Not the logs...that's my size. [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

I estimate my longest to be between 12"-13", intact. It spanned from back to front in the toilet, like a chocolate bridge over the poop water. I cannot estimate it's weight, but I imagine it was in excess of 20 solid ounces.

My line of work involves measuring constantly, so my eyeballed-estimation is definitely accurate.

If memory serves, this one I laid was either a triple, or quadruple flush.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

Last year my roomate laid one that we measured at 14-15 inches. We actually measured it with a tape, I know it wasn't 100% accurate but probably pretty close to that range.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

WTF

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
Last year my roomate laid one that we measured at 14-15 inches. We actually measured it with a tape, I know it wasn't 100% accurate but probably pretty close to that range.

[/ QUOTE ]

Funny, I wouldn't even want to *see* another human's excrement, let alone get close enough to measure it.

Has word gotten out that [censored] is out of town? This is the only explanation I have for the myriad of horrible horrible threads I've had to read today. [img]/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
WTF

[/ QUOTE ]

I didn't post in the wrong forum, did I? [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

I think this is a job for

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3...oredsignal.jpg

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

Come on man, it's just a little toilet-humor. Trying to add a little levity to the topic!

Is Nut-sack Man a large log-layer as well?

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

goodbye KSteel #2

(LOL, i just made a joke on accident)

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

I couldn't miss this [censored] of epic proportions, it was probably a once in a life time opportunity.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

if this thread gets locked K Deel banned from OOT it will be a large oversight.

btw why is "Log" capitalized?

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
WTF

[/ QUOTE ]

I didn't post in the wrong forum, did I? [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes, posts about feces belong in Politics.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
goodbye KSteel #2

(LOL, i just made a joke on accident)

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh come on. This is a legitimate question!
I think it's interesting to ponder the capabilities of the human body... that's all.

Plus, b*s*ball season is over so I'm bored.

Are you just jealous b/c your logs fall apart or something?

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
goodbye KSteel #2

(LOL, i just made a joke on accident)

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh come on. This is a legitimate question!
I think it's interesting to ponder the capabilities of the human body... that's all.

Plus, b*s*ball season is over so I'm bored.

Are you just jealous b/c your logs fall apart or something?

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't poop.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

It's not noteworthy unless it has to curve around the bowl to fit.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]


btw why is "Log" capitalized?

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh, you capitalize things that demand respect...

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
It's not noteworthy unless it has to curve around the bowl to fit.

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Oh, it would have. It def. would have donned the C-shape, but for whatever reason, I was dumping into an unusually large water closet that day. It was pretty straight. And I believe the first flush merely sheared (broke) it in half. 2nd flush made piece "A" disappear, and the third flush made piece "B" disappear.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

get yourself an icecream cone and you've got yourself a tasty recycled treat for when your finished.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
get yourself an icecream cone and you've got yourself a tasty recycled treat for when your finished.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wrong thread. This post belongs in the "would you eat crap for 6 months for a million dollars?" thread.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

True High School Story:

All boys, catholic high school, so you can get the sense of decorum. Sitting at lunch, and there is a rumbling from table to table about this poop some kid took in the fourth floor bathroom. I dismissed it, went back to eating. First period after lunch, I hear someone talking about it, next period, the whole class is buzzing. Last period of the day, my TEACHER mentioned something about it...we then proceeded to go nuts, and got to take field trips of 4-5 people at a time to look at this massive dump. Now, by this time, the whole school had gotten wind of this (intentional..) and as our group approached the bathroom, we could see a mini-shrine erected from looseleaf and old notebook cardboard. Over the doorway was a huge sign that said HOME OF THE LOG. I seriously doubted that it could be nearly as big as the hype. We walked in, opened the door, and looked...it was as big as a football. Literally. All it was missing was the laces....just a big stinky unreal mess. Ill never forget it. Ill never speak of this again, I just had to get it off my chest.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

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Ill never speak of this again, I just had to get it off my chest.

[/ QUOTE ]

DUDE! You got a Cleveland Steamer at school!!!

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

I laid one so thick it wouldn't even move down the tube. It just sat there like a loaf of bread. It was at a Jack in the Box and my friend went into the bathroom and saw it and claimed it was proof that I take it up the ass.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
I laid one so thick it wouldn't even move down the tube. It just sat there like a loaf of bread. It was at a Jack in the Box and my friend went into the bathroom and saw it and claimed it was proof that I take it up the ass.

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, it's not PROOF, per se. But it's not looking too good for you, pal. It's definitely not helping your case. I never said how thick mine was. Just long. Of course you can imagine it had to be pretty thick to support over a foot of processed food.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
True High School Story:

All boys, catholic high school, so you can get the sense of decorum. Sitting at lunch, and there is a rumbling from table to table about this poop some kid took in the fourth floor bathroom. I dismissed it, went back to eating. First period after lunch, I hear someone talking about it, next period, the whole class is buzzing. Last period of the day, my TEACHER mentioned something about it...we then proceeded to go nuts, and got to take field trips of 4-5 people at a time to look at this massive dump. Now, by this time, the whole school had gotten wind of this (intentional..) and as our group approached the bathroom, we could see a mini-shrine erected from looseleaf and old notebook cardboard. Over the doorway was a huge sign that said HOME OF THE LOG. I seriously doubted that it could be nearly as big as the hype. We walked in, opened the door, and looked...it was as big as a football. Literally. All it was missing was the laces....just a big stinky unreal mess. Ill never forget it. Ill never speak of this again, I just had to get it off my chest.

[/ QUOTE ]

A football? Intact? Jesus...

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

In all honesty the longest log I ever laid was the one inside yo momma!

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
True High School Story:

All boys, catholic high school, so you can get the sense of decorum. Sitting at lunch, and there is a rumbling from table to table about this poop some kid took in the fourth floor bathroom. I dismissed it, went back to eating. First period after lunch, I hear someone talking about it, next period, the whole class is buzzing. Last period of the day, my TEACHER mentioned something about it...we then proceeded to go nuts, and got to take field trips of 4-5 people at a time to look at this massive dump. Now, by this time, the whole school had gotten wind of this (intentional..) and as our group approached the bathroom, we could see a mini-shrine erected from looseleaf and old notebook cardboard. Over the doorway was a huge sign that said HOME OF THE LOG. I seriously doubted that it could be nearly as big as the hype. We walked in, opened the door, and looked...it was as big as a football. Literally. All it was missing was the laces....just a big stinky unreal mess. Ill never forget it. Ill never speak of this again, I just had to get it off my chest.

[/ QUOTE ]

Jesus Christ, did you go to Chaminade?! Was this Pat Bolans arms length crap?

Just sorted out via PM. This exact same thing happened at my all boys catholic high school in New York, except it was the size of a massive forearm and it was on the second floor. Everything else is exactly the same. Very weird. Obviously the pope endorses scat.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

what a sweet story.

once on a comping trip a guy showed everyone a disgusting probably 18" turd (terd?). it was a sick bright orange hue.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
True High School Story:

All boys, catholic high school, so you can get the sense of decorum. Sitting at lunch, and there is a rumbling from table to table about this poop some kid took in the fourth floor bathroom. I dismissed it, went back to eating. First period after lunch, I hear someone talking about it, next period, the whole class is buzzing. Last period of the day, my TEACHER mentioned something about it...we then proceeded to go nuts, and got to take field trips of 4-5 people at a time to look at this massive dump. Now, by this time, the whole school had gotten wind of this (intentional..) and as our group approached the bathroom, we could see a mini-shrine erected from looseleaf and old notebook cardboard. Over the doorway was a huge sign that said HOME OF THE LOG. I seriously doubted that it could be nearly as big as the hype. We walked in, opened the door, and looked...it was as big as a football. Literally. All it was missing was the laces....just a big stinky unreal mess. Ill never forget it. Ill never speak of this again, I just had to get it off my chest.

[/ QUOTE ]

Jesus Christ, did you go to Chaminade?! Was this Pat Bolans arms length crap?

Just sorted out via PM. This exact same thing happened at my all boys catholic high school in New York, except it was the size of a massive forearm and it was on the second floor. Everything else is exactly the same. Very weird. Obviously the pope endorses scat.

[/ QUOTE ]

Dude, your pm's are maxed out. But what is really [censored] up, is that when you said Chaminade, I automatically assumed you were talking about the Chaminade in my town, about 8 states west of you. They are obv all male catholic school, and our "rivals" or whatever you want to call it.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[quoteDude, your pm's are maxed out. But what is really [censored] up, is that when you said Chaminade, I automatically assumed you were talking about the Chaminade in my town, about 8 states west of you. They are obv all male catholic school, and our "rivals" or whatever you want to call it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Weird. This is so lame, theres not even a message saying my PMs are maxed out. I don't even want to get into how [censored] up it is, that PMs are also censored.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

The most uncomfortable thing though is when you're readin, everything's coming out fine, then something's wrong... you think about it for a moment, and you realize that your long solid log'o'filth has extended all the way to the bottom of the toilet, and is still attached to your bum... you literally have to raise up and hover to get the rest of it out.

ugh.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

PM's between friends you'd think would be fine to be uncensored, but I think the site doesn't want people sending horribly profane messages to people who they are (a) flaming or (b) trolling.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

I think this thread has quality.

Anyway, the problem with my monster dumps is that they always go halway down the hole instead of coiling up like a snake in the bowl. It's impossible to tell how much is hidden. I usually keep my records in terms of flushes: I've had too many cloggers to count.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

[ QUOTE ]
The most uncomfortable thing though is when you're readin, everything's coming out fine, then something's wrong... you think about it for a moment, and you realize that your long solid log'o'filth has extended all the way to the bottom of the toilet, and is still attached to your bum... you literally have to raise up and hover to get the rest of it out.

ugh.

[/ QUOTE ]

OMG, you're my hero. I've yet to have this happen.

You could also flush mid-dump to sort of...pull it out of your a**hole. Nasty.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

Yes, this is disappointing, and it happens to all of us.

There is no way to know how long these are. I may have laid one in excess of 13", 20 oz. But I'll never know. I can only speculate amongst friends.

I don't understand how someone sh*ts out a football though. I'm thinking it was just a styrofoam football that was layered in sh*t.

Did anyone verify if this was solid waste? It could have been papier mache.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3...oredsignal.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3...oredsignal.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3...oredsignal.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3...oredsignal.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3...oredsignal.jpg

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

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In all honesty the longest log I ever laid was the one inside yo momma!

[/ QUOTE ]
I bet you're not being honest at all.

and this is gross.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

I took this nearly 2 months ago. I have been waiting for this moment since then.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v2...0007Medium.jpg

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

Perhaps [censored] went camping. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

That is gross. It is pokin out of the water though, nice.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3...oredsignal.jpg

For christ's sake. I nearly threw up.

Re: Longest Log you\'ve ever laid..
 

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It's not noteworthy unless it has to curve around the bowl to fit.

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my friend has one that coiled around like 2 or 3 times. We took a picture. I'll try to track it down.