running a household
 

when/if it comes time to settle down , and you are married with kids ... if it was a choice between these options of running your household what would you prefer ?

Re: running a household
 

I expect to work WHILE staying home. I'd probably prefer that she be out of the house during the day, since I really need to be alone (adult-free, anyway; I've yet to fail to get along with anyone under the age of eight) at least six hours a day or so.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
I expect to work WHILE staying home. I'd probably prefer that she be out of the house during the day, since I really need to be alone (adult-free, anyway; I've yet to fail to get along with anyone under the age of eight) at least six hours a day or so.

[/ QUOTE ]

i expected there would be people going with other = 'working from home' - are you responsible for taking care of the kids & house in this scenario ?

Re: running a household
 

eff kids. DINK is the way to go.

Re: running a household
 

i don't expect anything though i am sure we will both be working, where that is i am not for sure.

one thing i do know is that i won't be a stay at home dad b/c that is my choice, as for my wife that is her choice not mine. if she wants to work fine, if she wants to stay at home and take care of the kids then thats fine too.

Re: running a household
 

I could swing this, though I'm not sure how I'd schedule my poker.

No feedings while I'm on the bubble, kid! [img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

Re: running a household
 

Dude. "Asian-American." Please.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
Dude. "Asian-American." Please.

[/ QUOTE ]

[img]/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

Re: running a household
 

it seems it's barely an option financially for there to even be a stay at home parent for most people.

also i think a lot of people don't like the idea of being the one 'hard at work' while their husband/wife 'gets to stay at home' and it can cause resentment.

i'm sure when the time comes i will end up in a 'both working' situation, but that is also kind of scary to me.

for all the 'both working' scenarios - are you working opposite shifts ? or are you paying for child care ?

Re: running a household
 

posting on a poker player forum, your choices are really bad.

i'm making all of my money about 3 feet from my bed. if i was still doing this when i have kids, i would most likely stay at home and watch them grow, and then when they napped in the mid afternoon, i would play poker for 3-4 hours.

i'm sure many people are doing the same thing.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
posting on a poker player forum, your choices are really bad.

i'm making all of my money about 3 feet from my bed. if i was still doing this when i have kids, i would most likely stay at home and watch them grow, and then when they napped in the mid afternoon, i would play poker for 3-4 hours.

i'm sure many people are doing the same thing.

[/ QUOTE ]
so what is the wife doing ?

the worst thing about my choices is that i didn't include pizza or beer.

i'm just trying to get a general feel of how people feel about this subject.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
Also, dude, chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature. Asian-American, please.

[/ QUOTE ]

FYP

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
so what is the wife doing ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Blowing him 10x a day, cooking his food, bathing him and giving him massages, etc.

Re: running a household
 

both my parents worked and its really not that difficult, before i started school i had my grandmother around. when i started school, i would go over to friends' houses and their mother would take care of us. these are friends that i am still close with today and consider my brother.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Also, dude, chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature. Asian-American, please.

[/ QUOTE ]

FYP

[/ QUOTE ]

I still don't understand why this is applicable to this thread.

Re: running a household
 

"DINK." For God's sake, do I need to draw you a diagram? 'Cause I've been known to do that.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
"DINK." For God's sake, do I need to draw you a diagram? 'Cause I've been known to do that.

[/ QUOTE ]

Double Income No Kids.

Maybe I'm missing something here. Actually, I would appreciate if you drew me a diagram. That could be pretty funny.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
both my parents worked and its really not that difficult, before i started school i had my grandmother around. when i started school, i would go over to friends' houses and their mother would take care of us. these are friends that i am still close with today and consider my brother.

[/ QUOTE ]
yeah that doesn't sound too bad, it's cool you had your grandma and friends mom around.

i feel lucky because my mom stayed at home to raise us. i really hate the idea of paying someone else to watch my kids, or working opposite shifts just to make things work.

a coworker of mine is about to enter into the situaton of working opposite shifts full time, i can't imagine how much that would suck.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
both my parents worked and its really not that difficult, before i started school i had my grandmother around. when i started school, i would go over to friends' houses and their mother would take care of us. these are friends that i am still close with today and consider my brother.

[/ QUOTE ]
yeah that doesn't sound too bad, it's cool you had your grandma and friends mom around.

i feel lucky because my mom stayed at home to raise us. i really hate the idea of paying someone else to watch my kids, or working opposite shifts just to make things work.

a coworker of mine is about to enter into the situaton of working opposite shifts full time, i can't imagine how much that would suck.

[/ QUOTE ]

my mom was a teacher. that was a perfect situation because she had pretty much the same hours as me.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
so what is the wife doing ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Blowing him 10x a day, cooking his food, bathing him and giving him massages, etc.

[/ QUOTE ]

she sounds very lucky.

Re: running a household
 

Okay, then. I am the lone girl who responded that I would rather work than stay at home. Hmm, maybe I will feel different once little Ettie arrives in February, but I don't think so. I enjoy my job (attorney), which is pretty strictly 7-4:30 w/ every other Friday off, so I can actually have a family life.

I have never been very domestic, you can ask my husband. Just the other night I nearly poisoned him again with my cooking (over spiced the pork w/ hot pepper seasoning). He is much better at cleaning & cooking than I am.

I must note, though, that lately I have been more domestic, getting dishes done, laundry, etc. Could be those girl hormones finally kicking in now that I am expecting, we will have to see if it sticks.

Re: running a household
 

I would expect both of us to be working. Now if his "job" is playing poker, then of course by being home all day I would expect him to help around the house and maybe keep the kids at home. If we both work outside of home, I would assume the housework, cooking, laundry because I don't mind doing that... Kids can be a shared duty.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
guys: i would rather be a stay at home dad, while my wife supports the family financially.

[/ QUOTE ]

However, I'd expect both of us to be working, as that would be financially what would make the most sense (probably).

Re: running a household
 

I prefer to financially support the family while she stays home barefoot with the kids and has my dinner ready every night when I get home from the bar. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Re: running a household
 

Your husband promised more pics of your boobs but has failed to produce. Can you help us out?

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
Your husband promised more pics of your boobs but has failed to produce. Can you help us out?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes. And toward that end, "The Dangle" is the preferred pose.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
a coworker of mine is about to enter into the situaton of working opposite shifts full time, i can't imagine how much that would suck.

[/ QUOTE ]

Friends of mine have been doing the same thing, and they're always tired and never see each other. The husband would like to quit his job (which he hates) and hang out with the kids full time, but the wife has some financial paranoia and insists they both have to be earning some dough (even though they are already quite comfortable financially).

I work from home (not p*ker) and we still send the kid to daycare. Kids demand too much attention for you to get any work done at the same time.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]

also i think a lot of people don't like the idea of being the one 'hard at work' while their husband/wife 'gets to stay at home' and it can cause resentment.


[/ QUOTE ]

Staying home with kids is 'hard work', and resentment can go both ways. You obviously do not have kids, most women that do would argue that it is more work than going to an office. You need to remember that a stay at home mom works 24/7.

I have been in every situation. When we first had kids, we both worked. I worked from home for a number of years, and now my wife stays home, and I work. I would not trade with my wife, and most men would not. When she does leave me at home for a day or a weekend, she usually returns to find me curled up in a ball, begging to go back to work. Not really, but it is hard work.

Re: running a household
 

I would love to be at home everyday with my kids. My current job allows this three days a week, the other 4 I am out of town for my job.

My wife and I both make really good money, so either one of staying at home is not an option right now when there is so much in life that we desire for both us and our 3 kids. Household chores are split for the most part, though I am seriously considering a maid and a lawn service. As for the job, I work at the happiest place on Earth, so the kids do not want me to quit...ever!

Maybe in a few years one of us will stay at home full time...I know my wife as stated if it came down to this she would be the one staying home.

Re: running a household
 

i want to work and my husband stay home and NOT work...guess im weird for that

i still wanna be able to get home in time to cook dinner though...i LOVEEEEEEEEE cooking for people

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

also i think a lot of people don't like the idea of being the one 'hard at work' while their husband/wife 'gets to stay at home' and it can cause resentment.


[/ QUOTE ]

Staying home with kids is 'hard work', and resentment can go both ways. You obviously do not have kids, most women that do would argue that it is more work than going to an office. You need to remember that a stay at home mom works 24/7.

I have been in every situation. When we first had kids, we both worked. I worked from home for a number of years, and now my wife stays home, and I work. I would not trade with my wife, and most men would not. When she does leave me at home for a day or a weekend, she usually returns to find me curled up in a ball, begging to go back to work. Not really, but it is hard work.

[/ QUOTE ]

oh i know, i agree with you. that is why i put 'gets to stay at home' in quotes and worded it the way i did. i was just throwing that out for discussion. i think it is common feeling from the provider to not understand (just watch supernanny!) and maybe why a lot of people might expect both to work (other than financial needs).

Re: running a household
 

although the more i think about i am pretty sure i would still want a part time job or something. i think i'd go crazy since it's my only interaction with other people.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
although the more i think about i am pretty sure i would still want a part time job or something. i think i'd go crazy since it's my only interaction with other people.

[/ QUOTE ]

My wife has a nanny two days a week, otherwise, she might go crazy.

Re: running a household
 

just remember, you can't make a ho a housewife

Re: running a household
 

Supernanny is a great example of how people create their own problems, then either say their life is so hard or become incapable of admitting there's even a problem. They become deeply emotionally invested in their own failure, and in portraying it in their minds as something other than a major inability and a screw-up on their fault.

Re: running a household
 

[ QUOTE ]
just remember, you can't make a ho a housewife

[/ QUOTE ]

NH

Re: running a household
 

i want to make enough from this, day trading investments and so forth where i can stay at home and my wife is she wants, and if she wants to work that is fine too of course, but then teach/coach as a hobby t the age of 40-45 ish, that would be in thee "ideal" world

Re: running a household
 

Other: I want to be making money, but whether she chooses to or not isn't up to me.

GoT