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post a joke
how does the butcher introduce his wife ?
meat patty. omg haha. rolf. ok your turn!. |
Re: post a joke
it's like a puzzle with pants
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[ QUOTE ]
it's like a puzzle with pants [/ QUOTE ] why ? BECAUSE PANTS ARE LIKE A RIVER !! ! AHAHAHAHHA. i love that one too. |
Re: post a joke
Oops
A man goes into hospital for a vasectomy. When he wakes up he's surrounded by several anxious looking doctors and asks nervously "Is there a problem?" The head surgeon says gently, with tears in his eyes "I'm afraid so...I'm very sorry but your notes got mixed up and we've given you a sex change rather than a vasectomy" The patient is devastated and shockingly replies "Do you mean to say I'll never experience another erection" The surgeon pauses for a moment then says "Well, you might, but it won't be yours!" |
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Why do farts smell?
So deaf people can enjoy them too. |
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What do old people smell like?
Depends. |
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What do you call a fish without an eye?
fsh. |
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Why did the Mexican guy throw his wife off a cliff?
Tequila |
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Little Johnny is in English Class.
The teacher says "Can anyone here use the word indefinately in a sentence?" Little Suzie raises her hand and the teacher calls on her. Little Suzie says "My family vacation was put on hold indefinately when my dad lost his job at the factory." The teacher tells her that she is sorry to hear about her dad but that the sentence was very good. At this point little Johnny raises his hand and the teacher calls on him. Little Johnny says "When I heard my balls slapping against Suzies' ass; I knew that I was in, definately!" |
mine is better
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No idear What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? still no idear what do you call a deer with no eyes no legs and no dick? still no [censored]' idear |
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What does a Texas tornado and a Tennessee divorce have in common?
Someone's gonna lose themselves a trailer. |
Re: post a joke
[ QUOTE ]
how does the butcher introduce his wife ? meat patty. omg haha. rolf. ok your turn!. [/ QUOTE ] Meh.. Lawrence |
Re: post a joke
for real, are you a boy or a girl?
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Re: post a joke
A little Mexican boy goes into the kitchen where his
>>>mom is baking. He puts his hand in the flour and >>>wipes it all over his face. "Mom, look, I'm a white >>>boy." His mom slaps him in the face and says "Go >>>show your father". >>> >>>He goes to his dad in the living room and says "Look >>>dad, I'm a white boy." His dad slaps him hard in the >>>face and says "Go show your grandmother." >>> >>>The boy goes in his grandmothers room and says >>>"Mira, abuelita, I'm a white boy" His grandmother >>>slaps him in the face and sends him back to his >>>mother. >>> >>>His mother says "See. Did you learn anything from >>>that?" >>> >>>To which the boy replies, "Sure did. I have only >>>been white for five minutes and I already hate you >>>Mexicans." |
This thread is going to be so dumb, I might as well post 2
What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?
Neil Armstrong WALKED on the MOON... and Michael Jackson raped little boys. |
Re: post a joke
Why don't Mexicans ever sneak up on anyone?
Because <font color="white">you can hear a lawn mower a mile away</font>. -d |
Re: post a joke
These two guys are at the bar when the one reaches and pulls out a cigarette. His buddy quickly pulls out a 10 inch lighter and lights his cigarette for him.
"Where the hell did you get that thing?" The firend asks rather shocked. "Oh my genie gave it to me," the first replies matter of factly. "Your genie? Wtf?" "Yah, i found him while cleaning out my attic. He'll grant you a wish if you want" So the one friend nods and the other guy conjures up the genie. The genie appears and says he'll grant the friend one wish and only one wish. "I want a MILLION BUCKS!" *POOF* All of the sudden the bar is filled with a million ducks. They're quacking and [censored] 'ing all over the place. The guy who wished for the money starts screaming and hollering, "I said a million bucks! What kind of genie is this?" And the other friend goes, "you think i asked for a 10 inch bic?" |
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what sound does it make when a truck load of vinegar and a truck load of water collide on the highway ?
DOOOOSH! |
Re: post a joke
I don't mean to be results-oriented in my analysis, but maybe a better thread title would have been "post a funny joke".
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Re: post a joke
Do you know what that joke is from? Well not from, but its a famous joke, thats not really a joke. The whole point is the middle of the story, ie there is no real punch line. There is a dvd out there with a ton of famous comics doing this joke. Google the aristocrats for more answers.
This is in response to teh Carment nsfw joke. |
Re: post a joke
[ QUOTE ]
for real, are you a boy or a girl? [/ QUOTE ] Doesn't this thread make it obvious? |
Re: post a joke
[ QUOTE ]
I don't mean to be results-oriented in my analysis, but maybe a better thread title would have been "post a funny joke". [/ QUOTE ] So you post one. [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] |
Re: post a joke
[ QUOTE ]
I don't mean to be results-oriented in my analysis, but maybe a better thread title would have been "post a funny joke". [/ QUOTE ] no. i like my topic. some of the best jokes are the ones that aren't even funny. |
Re: post a joke
Shortly after her wedding, the newlywed wife is complaining to her mother about her husband's insatiable sexual appetite.
"He wants to do it 15 times a day, anytime, anyplace, anywhere -- on the table, on the stairs, on the sofa, in the car, in the morning, in the afternoon, and in the evening. I can barely walk anymore!" The mother advises her daughter to tell him that she has her period, which seems like a good idea. So that evening, when the husband comes home from work, he proceeds to undress himself and his wife, when she stops him. "I'm sorry sweetie, but it's that time of the month." The husband gets up, looks at his wife, and says, "It's all good honey. I understand." He puts on a robe and walks away. The wife is somewhat surprised at the mature reaction of her husband, until a few minutes later he returns holding two glasses and a bottle of champagne. So she asks, "What's going on, dear?" "We're celebrating!" he replies. "Celebrating? What exactly are we celebrating?" she asks. "Anal sex week." |
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Re: post a joke
What is the definition of ultimate rejection?
Your hand falling asleep while masturbating. |
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"what is E.T short for?
. . . because of his little legs." -ricky gervais from 'extras' when prompted to tell someone a joke. |
Re: post a joke
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] I don't mean to be results-oriented in my analysis, but maybe a better thread title would have been "post a funny joke". [/ QUOTE ] no. i like my topic. some of the best jokes are the ones that aren't even funny. [/ QUOTE ] Why did the chicken cross the road? Results in white below: <font color="white">To get to the other side. What, you were expecting some funny reply?</font> |
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[ QUOTE ]
What is the definition of ultimate rejection? Your hand falling asleep while masturbating. [/ QUOTE ] I thought I could trust you!?!?! [img]/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img] |
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[ QUOTE ]
for real, are you a boy or a girl? [/ QUOTE ] funny.!! |
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Two penguins are taking a bath together.
The first penguin turns to the other and politely says, "Would you please pass the soap?" The second penguin says, "HOLY SH!T A TALKING PENGUIN" |
Re: post a joke
no, no you don't get it. I'm being serious, not making funny.
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Re: post a joke
[ QUOTE ]
no, no you don't get it. I'm being serious, not making funny. [/ QUOTE ] omghahahha [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] |
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A child molester, a rapist and a priest walk in to a bar....
And then another guy walks in the bar. |
Re: post a joke
[ QUOTE ]
it's like a puzzle with pants [/ QUOTE ] Damnit Durron...we went over this! He says 'pans' while he was supposed to say 'hands.' Although for some dumb reason everyone thinks he says 'pants.' Joke: There was a big moron and a little moron walking across a bridge. Who do you think fell off the bridge first? The big moron fell of first, of course, b/c the little moron was a little more on the bridge!!! Bwahahahahahah, rolf, lmfao, pwn3d, ship it, holla, batch, 3u0, wtf, brb, afk, etc.... Yugoslav |
Re: post a joke
I think you should stick to physics jokes. Give OOT what it wants . . . nay, NEEDS.
P.S. I think your joke works much better if instead of "another guy," you use "a second guy" instead. |
Re: post a joke
[ QUOTE ]
These two guys are at the bar when the one reaches and pulls out a cigarette. His buddy quickly pulls out a 10 inch lighter and lights his cigarette for him. "Where the hell did you get that thing?" The firend asks rather shocked. "Oh my genie gave it to me," the first replies matter of factly. "Your genie? Wtf?" "Yah, i found him while cleaning out my attic. He'll grant you a wish if you want" So the one friend nods and the other guy conjures up the genie. The genie appears and says he'll grant the friend one wish and only one wish. "I want a MILLION BUCKS!" *POOF* All of the sudden the bar is filled with a million ducks. They're quacking and [censored] 'ing all over the place. The guy who wished for the money starts screaming and hollering, "I said a million bucks! What kind of genie is this?" Oh, i forgot to tell you the Genie is hard of hearing , "you think i asked for a 10 inch bic?" [/ QUOTE ] FYP Many |
Re: post a joke
no. i like my topic. some of the best jokes are the ones that aren't even funny.
[/ QUOTE ] This can't be true Many |
Re: post a joke
What happens when you give a lawyer viagra?
He grows taller |
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