my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

so, we got home from the bars about two and a half hours ago, and I just woke up to my friend pissing on my carpet. He is really drunk right now, and has passed back out on my couch, murmering something about bacon [censored] in his scottish accent. basically, what I need to know right now is, should I mess with him, and how should I mess with him. He is starting a job in 3 1/2 hours

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

take his wallet

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

[ QUOTE ]
He is starting a job in 3 1/2 hours

[/ QUOTE ]

"Starting" like it's his first day? Wait until next time.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

I'd bet money that he doesn't make it to his job on time.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

I blame you for not keeping the bathroom in your place in the same place as his.

I had a buddy that did the same thing in the dorms once. Walked down the hall as normal but hooked a left one door before the bathroom. Pissed all over some poor bastards sock drawer.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

yes, as in his first day. If I had markers, I'd draw on him

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

Drag him onto the wet carpet.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

[ QUOTE ]
Drag him onto the wet carpet.

[/ QUOTE ]

winner

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

That rug really tied the room together man.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

he'll be punished enough - I started a job once with a hangover - ah mother, longest first day ever, and you can't call in sick and go home early -

RB

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

Once after a night of drinking a bunch of us were passed out on my buddy Ron's living room floor. Jay gets up, drunk, walks over to where Ron is lying in a sleeping bag, whips it out and starts to piss on Ron. Had no clue what was going on. Ron wakes up drunk, confused, and scared and cries out, then covers his head with the sleeping bag. Hilarity ensues.

Good times.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

atleast he didn't [censored] everywhere.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

Piss on him.

That way when his new boss tells him he's pissed off about his new employee showing up late, he can reply with "You're pissed off today? Well I was pissed on last night. CENSORED YOU BUDDY I QUIT! CENSORED EVERYONE!!!"

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

Last summer me and a couple of friends got trashed and my friend thought he was being funny and pissed on my leg. It took me a while to notice (I was TRASHED), but once I did I flipped out. To resolve the matter, I made my friend put his bare foot in my toilet while I pissed on it.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

[ QUOTE ]
That rug really tied the room together man.

[/ QUOTE ]

And this dude peed on it.

Re: my drunken friend just pissed on my carpet
 

[ QUOTE ]
That rug really tied the room together man.

[/ QUOTE ]

The Dude: "Walter, the chinaman who peed on my rug, I can't go give him a bill, so what the [censored] are you talking about? "

Walter Sobchak: "What the [censored] are you talking about? The chinaman is not the issue here, dude. I'm talking about drawing a line in the sand, dude. Across this line, you DO NOT... Also, dude, chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature. Asian-American, please."

The Dude: J"eez, Walter, I'm not talking about the guys who built the [censored] railroad here."