Delighting in Misery
 

Lately I've been playing a lot more B&M, and I'll occasionally sit at a $1/2 NL table if they don't have anything higher. It's fun for me, and the money isn't a concern. Last night this kid sat down at my table and bought in short for $40. He then proceeded (after he sat down), to pop his collar. It took every ounce of willpower I had to not laugh. Then he waited until his first hand was dealt, and he put his sunglasses on. These were fake ray bans that cost no more than $10. To each his own on the eyewear and the cost wasn't the issue...just that they looked cheap and from the 80's.

About two hands later, he called an all in on a board with 3 spades because he had his sunglasses on and misread his hand as two spades instead of a spade/club. He flipped them over and said "flush!" and "repopped" his collar. He was dismayed when he learned the news. I laughed directly at him and for some reason just couldn't stop for over a minute. I couldn't even look away. I'm normally not an overly jovial person, and I'm working on that...but I typically take delight in this. For some reason I felt bad afterward, because it was obvious the guy caught a few episodes of WPT and was playing with most, or all of his bankroll. He seemed to be completely unaware of why I was laughing and took offense to it.

The real question here is why do I delight in other peoples' misery? I find it incredibly necessary to tell people that they look like morons. On the surface, this sounds like a self-confidence issue, but I'm reasonably self-assured. It often borders between wanting to laugh at them and wanting to inform them quietly that they look ridiculous.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

I sometimes feel like I should inform douche bags of their douche baggery. Perhaps I feel like I am a normal guy, and they are just making a scene by popping their collar and acting ridiculous. It HAS to be a weird superiority complex of some sort, but why dwell on it? Making fun of douche bags is way too fun of a problem to try to fix.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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Making fun of douche bags is way too fun of a problem to try to fix.

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Agreed. People need to learn how stupid they look and if they obviously don't own a mirror or have friends to inform them of their actions/attire, they should be mocked.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

"Delighting in Misery" = Insecure loner looking for friends who share the same affliction and want to bask in the embarrassment of others to reassure themselves of their "greatness" while only looking like even bigger jackass's then the "douchebags" they are berating.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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"Delighting in Misery" = Insecure loner looking for friends who share the same affliction and want to bask in the embarrassment of others to reassure themselves of their "greatness" while only looking like even bigger jackass's then the "douchebags" they are berating.

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Are you saying that you wouldn't have laughed at the guy?

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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"Delighting in Misery" = Insecure loner looking for friends who share the same affliction and want to bask in the embarrassment of others to reassure themselves of their "greatness" while only looking like even bigger jackass's then the "douchebags" they are berating.

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Sounds like the words of a douche bag that's been berated one too many times.

/jest

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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"Delighting in Misery" = Insecure loner looking for friends who share the same affliction and want to bask in the embarrassment of others to reassure themselves of their "greatness" while only looking like even bigger jackass's then the "douchebags" they are berating.

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Your opinion, however generalizing, is noted. I didn't seek this guy out, he came to me. For the previous 2 hours of play, everyone looked well within a stone's throw of normal. I wasn't the only one who thought he looked like an idiot, but I didn't point it out to anyone either. I didn't say a word, I just couldn't prevent myself from laughing. I didn't embarrass him at all, I never even vocalized my thoughts. I simply laughed, at him.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

It's simple, openly embarrising someone who clearly doesn't know what they're doing is simply being a jackass, enough said.

The ability to empathize doesn't need to be derived from experience it simply requires being human.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

Your post didn't quite bother me so much as the replies. It happens to everyone, guess I had to be there.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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It often borders between wanting to laugh at them and wanting to inform them quietly that they look ridiculous.

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Well, next time maybe try the latter...you will come off as a much nicer person and actually feel good about yourself. People often would rather mock than try to help someone...too many years of Saturday Night Live and bad stand up comics who can only mock others to get a laugh. Also, you don't really know how someone will react - they may get defensive or hostile - but at least you can say you tried.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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Well, next time maybe try the latter...you will come off as a much nicer person and actually feel good about yourself. People often would rather mock than try to help someone...too many years of Saturday Night Live and bad stand up comics who can only mock others to get a laugh. Also, you don't really know how someone will react - they may get defensive or hostile - but at least you can say you tried.

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Typically, I'd agree with you. But the kid was obviously full of himself and there was no way that he would take kindly to anything I said, even if I told him that the entire table was laughing at him. His opinion on the matter was obviously not changing. The collar thing, whatever...preppies will be preppies. That by itself doesn't bother me. The sunglasses at a $1/2 NL table, where entire fortunes of $100 are won and lost at the drop of a hat just makes me laugh. I'm still laughing about it, I don't know why.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

That would of been hilarious to see, wish i could of been there. I would of gotten a banana thrown it at him and told him he looked like a monkey.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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Typically, I'd agree with you. But the kid was obviously full of himself and there was no way that he would take kindly to anything I said, even if I told him that the entire table was laughing at him. His opinion on the matter was obviously not changing. The collar thing, whatever...preppies will be preppies. That by itself doesn't bother me. The sunglasses at a $1/2 NL table, where entire fortunes of $100 are won and lost at the drop of a hat just makes me laugh. I'm still laughing about it, I don't know why.

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This is seemingly lost on those who need to preach their morals in this thread. Some people who let their ego be their guide will do something stupid, and getting a good laugh out of the moment is a part of life.

I have done stupid things have had friends and stranges laughed at me for what I did. Did I think they were "Insecure loner[s] looking for friends who share the same affliction and want to bask in the embarrassment of others to reassure themselves of their "greatness" while only looking like even bigger jackass's then the "douchebags" they are berating." No. They were right, it was funny.

Life is funny. Things happen that are funny. Enjoy them.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

If an old man misreads his hand and declares a flush, I do not delight in his misery.

If a quiet, polite middle aged woman misreads her hand and declares a flush, I do not delight in her misery.

If a humble newbie sits down and misreads his or her hand and declares a flush, I do not delight in his or her misery.

If a gregarious, good-naturedly trash talking man misreads his hand and declares a flush, I do not delight in his misery, though I may give him hell for it for a few minutes.

If a young, hat and glasses wearing, collar-popping, WPT wannabe who thinks he's god's gift to the poker world by his attitude or demeanor misreads his hand and declares a flush, I will attempt to laugh at him inside, but if I outright laugh directly at him, I won't feel bad.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

[ QUOTE ]
"Delighting in Misery" = Insecure loner looking for friends who share the same affliction and want to bask in the embarrassment of others to reassure themselves of their "greatness" while only looking like even bigger jackass's then the "douchebags" they are berating.

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huh??? I don't get this from this poster,,we just play too much poker so when we step down for fun we find it hilarious how some "first time in a card room" people present themselves,,,,,straight out of TV,,,,,,but we must be nice.gotta love the fish!!!!

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

Don't feel bad. That's awesome. I wish I could have been there I would have been right next to you laughing just as hard. [censored] that kid. Like another poster said, if it's an old man who misreads his hand, then I don't laugh. This guy's asking for it. He's looking for attention by popping that collar. Give it to him.

Coolie Points!
 

When I was in college (70's) we tagged people with "Coolie Points". Coolie Points were strictly demerit, there was no way to win them back -- but they didn't accumulate. They were also awarded arbitrarily. Coolie Points were given when you tried to do something "cool" that failed spectacularly.

One time, driving through the Chicago turnpike with a car full of friends, I rolled through the toll stop, threw the change at the basket -- and missed. I had to backup, get out of the car, and pick up the money (since we had already collected all of our change). The first guy to speak up awarded me 10,000 Coolie points for the blunder. By the I had found the coins and got through the toll, the total was over a million. It was a way for everyone present to acknowledge the idiocy of the mistake.

The correct response to the flush was, "2 million Coolie Points!" -- then let it go.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

Word. We were all donks once. Doing things like that make guys like that not want to come dump their cash to you. Good work.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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Word. We were all donks once. Doing things like that make guys like that not want to come dump their cash to you. Good work.

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Life is not all about money and +EV. What good is money if you can't enjoy a highly comedic scene. I see the point of not coaching a fish online by berating him for chasing his set of 2s on an three broadway board 4 handed, but this is entirely different.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

I don't get it. The kid dresses differently than you want him to, and this makes you delight in making fun of him.

Do you also make fun of people with turbins? What about noserings or eyerings? What about someone who is goth? Gold chains? Some different ethnic group?

Perhaps he wanted to hide his neck pulse with the collar. And his pupil dilation and blink rate with the shades. So what? Just play your game, and let him play his game in peace.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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Do you also make fun of people with turbins? What about noserings or eyerings? What about someone who is goth? Gold chains? Some different ethnic group?

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Yes to all. Except the turbans and ethnicity. Unless they're Transylvanian -- you've got to make fun of that. Well, some turbans are just funny -- like the kind Arafat used to wear.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

If you have a choice to do something, and do it, you're getting made fun of.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

There's a difference between laughing at something stupid on the spur of the moment and delighting in someone's misery.

If someone misreads a hand or slips and falls or their dentures fall out or their toupee blows off, that's funny [censored].

If you go out of your way to embarrass someone, make them feel stupid, silly, or bad in any way, you're an [censored], pure and simple.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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There's a difference between laughing at something stupid on the spur of the moment and delighting in someone's misery.

If someone misreads a hand or slips and falls or their dentures fall out or their toupee blows off, that's funny [censored].

If you go out of your way to embarrass someone, make them feel stupid, silly, or bad in any way, you're an [censored], pure and simple.

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Completely disagree. Dentures or toupee falling off is only funny if the victim is an ass hole. Then they deserve it. And if they deserve it, I may not go out of my way, but I certainly won't try to hide my amusement (laughter). There are few better feelings than laughing at dousche bag that just made themself look like a jackass.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

The word is Schadenfraude. Its German which is funny enough in itself.

J

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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Do you also make fun of people with turbins? What about noserings or eyerings? What about someone who is goth? Gold chains? Some different ethnic group?


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No, yes, yes, sometimes, and no.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

Sometimes you have no control over it - it's hilarious, you laugh. That's life.

I don't want to drive away a donator, but if he comes to the table acting like a cartoon character, well, I can't help it, I find cartoons amusing.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

Hmmm. People are so good. Are we not?

Yes, we are "good". At being "bad".

Apparently, this is a common sentiment, delighting in another's misery. I notice that there is actually a specific word for this sentiment towards another:

Schadenfreude

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Taking malicious satisfaction in another person's troubles is schadenfreude. Even though there may be some guilt involved, this noun comes in handy when someone feels glee or gloats over another person's suffering.

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I would never do this, of course. [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

People and things don't change much. You may like this book.

Post deleted- posted twice
 

(poof)

This probably bound to be the most viewed post of all time !!

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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The real question here is why do I delight in other peoples' misery?

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Because you're an rswhole.

That's not necessarily a bad thing.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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The real question here is why do I delight in other peoples' misery?

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I think that "misery" is a bit of an overstatement. Should you find yourself laughing at cancer patients and hurricane victims, be concerned.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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I think that "misery" is a bit of an overstatement. Should you find yourself laughing at cancer patients and hurricane victims, be concerned.

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LOL, there's a pretty big difference between laughing at a WPT wannabe and laughing at hurricane victims and/or cancer patients.

I would have felt bad for an older guy who just misread his hand, or anyone else that didn't go out of their way to look like a tool.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

there are two possible answers here.

1. you have severe psychological problems, insecurities, etc, and you have an emotional need to ridicule others, bring them down, etc to make yourself feel better about yourself, or to selectively verify your consciously fabricated HIGH opinion of yourself, which is a defense mechanism to mask your subconscious LOW opinion of yourself.

2. you saw a goofball do something goofy and laughed like any normal person would when confronted with something amusing.

i'll go with the the assumption that the simplist answer is the more likely. so, IMO, you can relax and feel okay about yourself. have a beer, buy your girlfriend a present, move on with your life in comfort.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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The real question here is why do I delight in other peoples' misery?

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Easy. Look at your avatar. Misery loves company....

Be well.

Re: Delighting in Misery
 

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Unless they're Transylvanian -- you've got to make fun of that.

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Hey!!! [img]/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img]

-Mike

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