Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

I know of a bouncer (working in the states) who had a knife pulled on him. the knifer was clearly nervous, so the bouncer did a karate stance (he didn't know karate) and said "all right, let's see what you got." dude dropped the knife and ran. I imagine something like this could work, but you never know with those crazy phillipenes.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

That was a much slicker move than I would have pulled off, while still being very intelligent.

To the people who think OP's a pussy: You're morans, and probably will die very, very soon.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
I know of a bouncer (working in the states) who had a knife pulled on him. the knifer was clearly nervous, so the bouncer did a karate stance (he didn't know karate) and said "all right, let's see what you got." dude dropped the knife and ran. I imagine something like this could work, but you never know with those crazy phillipenes.

[/ QUOTE ]

Now that is the right move if you have the gusto to pull it off.

Some other options
 

1. Reach a hand up to one ear and look down and to the side. Say, "abort! Abort!" Then look confused. Say, "No, no... Wait! No, Thursday..... Pause.... wait... OK, chicken.. Well no wait. operation gopher meatball? No, ok, Thursday." (put your hand up as in "please hold on") continue your insanity on your mike until something interesting happens or it dissipates.

2. When he pulls his butterfly knife out, you make with the pantomime butterfly knife. Then pantomime every action he makes until you get stabbed, and then pantomime stabbing him too, which won’t actually hurt him, since you have a fictitious knife.

3. Grab an onlooker on either side and smash their heads together knocking both unconscious, then regain eye contact with short knife wielding dude…. See what happens. If nothing happens, go to plan 1.

4. Poo and fling it at him. If you score a hit, you should run because he will stab you. You could also drop trow and just start pooing. This will make it too weird to stab you.

5. Run up and grab his hand and force the knife into some non-lethal part of your body. This will freak him out… Say, “finish me….. …. …. FINISH ME!!!!!!!!” And he will run away. This will actually work I feel sure of it!

6. He started speaking some other language? You start speaking another language. Booyah! what’s up now, little philipino dude? You gonna stab a dude that speaks Japanese? HAHAHHAHAHA, oh [censored], yes you are.

7. Make out with a nearby dude. This will make him confused about the fact that you were making out with his girl. Tell him you thought his girl was a dude. Reach for his girls crotch to verify.

8. Pantomime “stuck behind an invisible wall”

9. Say, I’m so sorry…. I’m so sorry. Then breakdance. If you can do the moonwalk, then do it. Because it’s like backing up, but better because no one REALIZES you’re backing up.

Re: Some other options
 

Ahahhahaha - My stomach actually hurts but that could be from the food poisoning too. Wow - the first 1 reminds me of an episode of hey arnold I saw a long time ago.

Re: Some other options
 

You owe me a new monitor. I woke my wife and kids up with my laughing!

Re: Some other options
 

beetz, that was amazing. there should be a rewards system for awesome posts like this.

Re: Some other options
 

This brought images to mind of the self-beating-up in Fight Club. Nice post.

Re: Some other options
 

[ QUOTE ]
This brought images to mind of the self-beating-up in Fight Club. Nice post.

[/ QUOTE ]

Honestly, I'd run. But, if that wasn't an option, then really beating yourself up is the next best thing. Remember, he might not believe you if you just slug yourself in the gut, but if you punch yourself hard in the face and are spitting blood, he's gonna be pretty put out.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

shoot him in the dick?

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

I'm surprised you didn't get his V-card.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

yeah man call the girl

she probably broke up with him that night.... if not he aint gonna find out.

Re: Some other options
 

[ QUOTE ]
1. Reach a hand up to one ear and look down and to the side. Say, "abort! Abort!" Then look confused. Say, "No, no... Wait! No, Thursday..... Pause.... wait... OK, chicken.. Well no wait. operation gopher meatball? No, ok, Thursday." (put your hand up as in "please hold on") continue your insanity on your mike until something interesting happens or it dissipates.

2. When he pulls his butterfly knife out, you make with the pantomime butterfly knife. Then pantomime every action he makes until you get stabbed, and then pantomime stabbing him too, which won’t actually hurt him, since you have a fictitious knife.

3. Grab an onlooker on either side and smash their heads together knocking both unconscious, then regain eye contact with short knife wielding dude…. See what happens. If nothing happens, go to plan 1.

4. Poo and fling it at him. If you score a hit, you should run because he will stab you. You could also drop trow and just start pooing. This will make it too weird to stab you.

5. Run up and grab his hand and force the knife into some non-lethal part of your body. This will freak him out… Say, “finish me….. …. …. FINISH ME!!!!!!!!” And he will run away. This will actually work I feel sure of it!

6. He started speaking some other language? You start speaking another language. Booyah! what’s up now, little philipino dude? You gonna stab a dude that speaks Japanese? HAHAHHAHAHA, oh [censored], yes you are.

7. Make out with a nearby dude. This will make him confused about the fact that you were making out with his girl. Tell him you thought his girl was a dude. Reach for his girls crotch to verify.

8. Pantomime “stuck behind an invisible wall”

9. Say, I’m so sorry…. I’m so sorry. Then breakdance. If you can do the moonwalk, then do it. Because it’s like backing up, but better because no one REALIZES you’re backing up.

[/ QUOTE ]

POTY

Re: Some other options
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
1. Reach a hand up to one ear and look down and to the side. Say, "abort! Abort!" Then look confused. Say, "No, no... Wait! No, Thursday..... Pause.... wait... OK, chicken.. Well no wait. operation gopher meatball? No, ok, Thursday." (put your hand up as in "please hold on") continue your insanity on your mike until something interesting happens or it dissipates.

2. When he pulls his butterfly knife out, you make with the pantomime butterfly knife. Then pantomime every action he makes until you get stabbed, and then pantomime stabbing him too, which won’t actually hurt him, since you have a fictitious knife.

3. Grab an onlooker on either side and smash their heads together knocking both unconscious, then regain eye contact with short knife wielding dude…. See what happens. If nothing happens, go to plan 1.

4. Poo and fling it at him. If you score a hit, you should run because he will stab you. You could also drop trow and just start pooing. This will make it too weird to stab you.

5. Run up and grab his hand and force the knife into some non-lethal part of your body. This will freak him out… Say, “finish me….. …. …. FINISH ME!!!!!!!!” And he will run away. This will actually work I feel sure of it!

6. He started speaking some other language? You start speaking another language. Booyah! what’s up now, little philipino dude? You gonna stab a dude that speaks Japanese? HAHAHHAHAHA, oh [censored], yes you are.

7. Make out with a nearby dude. This will make him confused about the fact that you were making out with his girl. Tell him you thought his girl was a dude. Reach for his girls crotch to verify.

8. Pantomime “stuck behind an invisible wall”

9. Say, I’m so sorry…. I’m so sorry. Then breakdance. If you can do the moonwalk, then do it. Because it’s like backing up, but better because no one REALIZES you’re backing up.

[/ QUOTE ]


Wow, that is the meaning of LMAO

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
butterfly knife and loads it up

[/ QUOTE ]

How big a knife are we talking here?

[/ QUOTE ]
http://www.newgraham.com/images/42_MC_LARGE.jpg

I'm thinking he just meant to scare OP since he actually brandished the knife. If he really meant to stab OP, he probably would have got into a fight and then pull the knife where OP can't see it. It's still a good idea to back off when you have a knife pulled on you unless you're carrying.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

Either way, I'm still running like a bitch.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

Rush anyone reaching into a pocket because it's a death sentence if he gets there.

Once it's out, if you have room to run before he can get a stab in on your back, do it. Better he laughs at your "cowardly" ass than that you wind up dead or disfigured. If I were that dude with a knife getting out-angled by a pretty boy, I'd go for the face, by the way. That'd put you right back down here with the rest of us. And solve the problem with the girlfriend at the same time.

Note: I'm not that guy and never would be.

This sounds like a set-up with the chick, by the way. What did you do, walk out the door and start sucking her face right away? If you were jumped as soon as you made an appearance, she had every reason to suspect he might be around, and probably wanted to be fought over. If not, she's pretty dumb. If so, she's even more dumb. You lose both ways.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
stall him until the cops show up?

if he charges you before they get there, side step him, wrap your shirt around his knife arm, grap his forearm and twist/snap it backwards at the elbow, he will fall to his knees, then you put your foot on his neck and press it to the ground while making out with his girlfriend.

[/ QUOTE ]

If there aren't sharks with lasers in here somewhere, try to move the fight to the water so you can enlist their aid.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Drinking age is 16 here Skip. I'm not going to pursue it anymore but yea, next time I'll know how to defend myself better. It was just sad that I was so much bigger than the guy yet I couldn't get the balls to fight him because of the knife. The thought of being gutted wasn't very appealling.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wishing you had fought a guy with a knife who seems intending to use it isn't about not having balls. It's about not having brains.

[/ QUOTE ]

Good review, diebitter.

I think we should start applying our movie ranking stars to situations like this.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Call his bluff, he cant kill you with a knife, besides, its not like he had a gun, break his [censored] arm and then take it from him

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, no one has ever died from being stabbed. Especially in a 3rd world country. Whenever I am attacked outside of a bar and have a knife drawn on me I figure the guy is bluffing.

[/ QUOTE ]

Anyone who's fought a lot have any type of predictions? I do have a good 8 inches on him... I'm just curious - I'm now pretty confident that saving my ass was the right move even if I was a 99% sure thing.

[/ QUOTE ]

Since you have such a size advantage over him, you need to let him have a few courtesy stabs before you start fighting back. It's totally worth it to get stabbed over some strange chick you just met in a bar. Anything less is being a pussy.

[/ QUOTE ]

LOL

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
Yeah I am sure that his chancing of surviving a stab wound in Manilla are really good since they have such great healthcare.

[/ QUOTE ]

And since Filipinos are not known for their knife fighting.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
Easy.

When you're squared off with the dude with the knife, remove your shirt.

This will let him know that you are seriously getting ready to throw down. No one stabs you in a ring like this if you're "getting ready"

Next... and this is the key part, remove your shoes. This makes it looks like your some martial arts master, and buys you more time

finally, remove your pants and underwear. No one will stab a naked dude, it's just too weird. People will probably just slowly turn away.

[/ QUOTE ]

This thread is turning into a good one.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
Tai-Kwan Do or whatever comes from some part of Asia but it doesn't mean everyone in Asia knows it [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

You're correct though - Running away was the best move. I just hope there are other Jessica Alba look alikes without boyfriends out there.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wrong. Knives are cultural there in a way much greater than say boxing or wrestling is cultural here. In Guam I got threatened by Filipinos with knives many times even as a young kid, and pretty much every Filipino carried one. Think of the likelihood of a Filipino back in his homeland having a clue to how to knife fight more like the chance of an American having played basketball, football, or baseball.

And compound that with the fact that even a guy who isn't good with a knife doesn't really have to be. He just has to have the knife.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Easy.

When you're squared off with the dude with the knife, remove your shirt.

This will let him know that you are seriously getting ready to throw down. No one stabs you in a ring like this if you're "getting ready"

Next... and this is the key part, remove your shoes. This makes it looks like your some martial arts master, and buys you more time

finally, remove your pants and underwear. No one will stab a naked dude, it's just too weird. People will probably just slowly turn away.

[/ QUOTE ]

This thread is turning into a good one.

[/ QUOTE ]

keep going to B.B.'s other posts here. It turns awesome [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
butterfly knife and loads it up

[/ QUOTE ]

How big a knife are we talking here?

[/ QUOTE ]
http://www.newgraham.com/images/42_MC_LARGE.jpg

I'm thinking he just meant to scare OP since he actually brandished the knife. If he really meant to stab OP, he probably would have got into a fight and then pull the knife where OP can't see it. It's still a good idea to back off when you have a knife pulled on you unless you're carrying.

[/ QUOTE ]
thats not very big, the blade is smaller than my thumb.
also, that knife doesnt look anything like a butterfly.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
thats not very big, the blade is smaller than my thumb.

[/ QUOTE ]
That's probably not life-size, but it's not that much longer. It's a concealed weapon. It's not supposed to be a claymore you strap to your back.

[ QUOTE ]
also, that knife doesnt look anything like a butterfly.

[/ QUOTE ]
I believe it's named that for the way it looks when you're twirling it open and shut. There's videos all over if you look hard enough

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]

I believe it's named that for the way it looks when you're twirling it open and shut. There's videos all over if you look hard enough

[/ QUOTE ]
if theyre all over, why would i have to look hard?

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

I don't know. Here's some: http://balisong.theasylum.org/

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

They're illegal now in a lot of places. Stupid gov't. One day it will be illegal to have hands.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
They're illegal now in a lot of places. Stupid gov't. One day it will be illegal to have hands.

[/ QUOTE ]theres already a bill getting passed to regulate the length/sharpness of fingernails.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

kick his ass like a total badass and wake up with your spiderman sheets all touseled up. you're a real superhero now

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

I think he at least has the sense to get out when the knife shows up. I'd take the over easily, and in fact, I am so confident, I'd take it at -125. I won't give more than that, but I think he can make it way past 28.

Re: Scary Bar Situation
 

[ QUOTE ]
If I were that dude with a knife getting out-angled by a pretty boy, I'd go for the face, by the way.

[/ QUOTE ]

There is a commonly used S cut. Imagine a quick s movement performed infront of your face. It starts on the right hand side slicing across the forehead causing blood to flow into the eyes, then the blade turns and travels diagonally taking out the left eye followed by cutting a piece off the nose and upper lip, it then makes another turn and ends on your chin. If your lucky he leaves you like this, I'm sure plastic surgery is great there, if your unlucky he finishes by stabbing you a few times and leaves you to bleed out. With the blood loss / trauma coupled with the lack of emergency services you don't have much chance.

So best case you are disfigured and blinded, worst case you die slowly and painfully! Evaluate this situation and see if it's worth it for some random bar tart?