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lowroller
11-21-2004, 03:07 AM
Saw a thread awhile back where someone didn't like telling friends/family he played full-time and wanted some advice on what to tell them he was "doing". I tried to do a search, but couldn't come up with anything....so I'll start one here.

What are some clever job titles that one could use with family or friends at a cocktail party, Thanksgiving dinner, etc. that gives a true/glossy description of what a poker player "does".

Packerfan1
11-21-2004, 03:42 AM
I find "Statistical/Financial Risk Analyst" to be better received than "Moron Herder". /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Of course nowadays thanks to the WPT you're better off just telling everyone you're a poker player. Even Moms are ok with that one now... Its not like the disgust we used to get way back when, like before 2001.

Pack

Blarg
11-21-2004, 07:56 AM
Slur it a little and speak real quickly, and tell 'em you work in Asset Banishment.

Daliman
11-21-2004, 09:09 AM
I specialize in short-term investments.

Kurn, son of Mogh
11-21-2004, 01:34 PM
I told my family I was a semi-professioal poker player. Their response was "cool"

lowroller
11-21-2004, 01:47 PM
C'mon guys...I expected more creativity from this crowd!

*I claim to have no creativity, hence my post

daryn
11-21-2004, 02:56 PM
i bet on the digital representations of playing cards on the internet

beernutz
11-21-2004, 04:39 PM
I sit for long hours in front of a monitor watching my ass(et)s expand.

coffeecrazy1
11-21-2004, 05:50 PM
How about "Economic Redistribution Negotiator?"

eastbay
11-21-2004, 05:57 PM
Tax Collector. (Only mention it's a stupidity tax if pressed.)

eastbay

NJchick
11-21-2004, 06:42 PM
If you play online.

Internet Gaming Consultant

spamuell
11-21-2004, 07:43 PM
I sleep most of the day. Layabout? No, don't worry, I gamble on the internet at night.

You could say you're a "hospitality manager", basically in that it's your job to keep bad players at the table.

mostsmooth
11-21-2004, 08:58 PM
how about "fisherman"

Shilly
11-21-2004, 09:14 PM
Good one.

eric5148
11-22-2004, 01:28 PM
Why can't you say poker player? If someone gives me a dirty look after I tell them I'm a poker player, I walk away, that's not someone I want to talk to.

Philuva
11-22-2004, 01:54 PM
Game Theorist.

onegymrat
11-22-2004, 02:32 PM
Ooh, so close to what I was using when I was laid off for six months last year.

Freelance Gaming Consultant

Matt Flynn
11-22-2004, 04:34 PM
tell them you trade options. or are in risk arbitrage. or risk analyst. or a leverage investor. or, as my title once was, statistical process controller. that was at a tomato canning factory for Campbell's. $7/hr in 1987. the big bucks.

matt

Boris
11-22-2004, 05:35 PM
We need him. badly.

Talk2BigSteve
11-22-2004, 06:04 PM
Tell them you are a Computerized Rockets Statistical Multitasker for NASA and your job duties are Top Secret.

Living, Learning, and Laughing.
Big Steve /images/graemlins/cool.gif

NJchick
11-22-2004, 06:20 PM
That's good.

Or....

Independent Gaming Consultant

Personal Gaming Consultant

Table Games Administrator

the list goes on and on....

Senor Choppy
11-23-2004, 12:04 PM
I prefer telling them I'm into murders and executions.

Duke
11-23-2004, 01:20 PM
Some of my favorite lines to use:

4. I give poker lessons
3. I'm in the entertainment industry
2. I work with retards (a la Something About Mary)
1. I'm gainfully unemployed

~D

Sundevils21
11-23-2004, 02:35 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Why can't you say poker player? If someone gives me a dirty look after I tell them I'm a poker player, I walk away, that's not someone I want to talk to.

[/ QUOTE ]

even if it's your grandma? that's cold

Lafortezza
11-23-2004, 05:35 PM
"I am an Aquarium manager"

2planka
11-24-2004, 11:19 AM
Professional Bluff Inducer.

jakethebake
11-24-2004, 01:59 PM
I take advantage of gambling addicts.

jakethebake
11-24-2004, 02:00 PM
[ QUOTE ]
how about "fisherman"

[/ QUOTE ]Thats the best yet.

jakethebake
11-24-2004, 02:02 PM
[ QUOTE ]
"I am an Aquarium manager"

[/ QUOTE ]Very nice!

Wheezl
11-24-2004, 09:31 PM
-Mason-

phishfan
11-24-2004, 09:43 PM
Quality Control Field Inspector for the Random Number Generator division of ACME inc. Whenever your big pairs get cracked you know you've got a bad one.

daryn
11-24-2004, 11:40 PM
</font><blockquote><font class="small">In risposta di:</font><hr />
2. I work with retards


[/ QUOTE ]


very good duke. i got a nice laugh out of this.

Lawrence Ng
11-25-2004, 05:49 AM
[ QUOTE ]
If you play online.

Internet Gaming Consultant

[/ QUOTE ]

I like this one.

47outs
11-25-2004, 10:44 AM
I've mentioned online consultant to chicks.

For inquiring minds who want proof I sent them here,
www.tradal.net (http://www.tradal.net)


And for the chicks I really want to impress, I show them this, www.neteller.com/myfataccount (http://www.neteller.com/myfataccount) (they have to be in my room for this one.)



outs

housenuts
11-25-2004, 09:20 PM
i'll stick to what i used to call myself when i was 18 running an adult website profiting off banners and referrals.

Internet Entrepreneur

EliteNinja
11-26-2004, 01:26 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Internet Entrepreneur

[/ QUOTE ]

I like that one.

If only I could come up with something as witty as the titles I see here.