23 very interesting Chuck Klosterman questions (LONG!)

[MrFeelNothin]

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Well that one is easy now that I look at it because of the political prisoner standpoint, which I don't really care about, but if you change it to some other group of people I could see my answer being different.

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It's easy for me because it's incredibly important that political prisoners are freed. But I won't elaborate in this forum and I hate the politics one so I just won't.

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I don't think I could kick any living creature to death, especially when they are bound, helpless to fight back. No matter the good that would come of it, I don't have it in me.

[MrFeelNothin]

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1. More interesting but less important. And it would get old quick. I'd take Einstein.


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Don't you think that all of scientific discoveries that Einstein made would have eventually been made regardless?

[RunDownHouse]

No way could I kick a healthy, standing Clydesdale to death in 20 minutes. Unpossible.

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No way could I kick a healthy, standing Clydesdale to death in 20 minutes. Unpossible.

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Break the front two legs and this is pretty easy. You're not thinking about this clearly at all. Also, if you just did a flying kick into its side with all your weight, it would collapse sideways.

I would guess I could do this in under 2 mins if necessary, but I haven't thought that hard about it.

NT

[Sooga]

Wasn't too bad with OCR software.

[Sooga]

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18. Europe, not close.


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It's funny you say this... my two friends said moon, and not close, reason being that how often do you get a chance to go to the moon? You can go to Europe pretty much whenever you want.

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You can go to Europe pretty much whenever you want.

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Maybe YOU can, it would cause serious hardship for me. I would think the moon was cool, but I doubt it would be worth giving up a couple years of doing awesome stuff that I have always wanted to do but probably won't have the chance to while still in my 20's.

NT

[RunDownHouse]

OK, looks like list format is the way to go.

1. Yes, more impressive than Einstein. Einstein wasn't unique in the sense of being utterly alien to the rest of humanity; he was simply... a little more... than anyone else, and in only one regard. Someday somebody will come along that will top Einstein. I can't say the same about a real-life frickin magician.

2. As I stated, I don't think its physically possible for me to do that. I'd have to be a cheerleader or stripper or something to even get my foot that high, let alone up there with any force. I'd have to eyeball it, but I'm not sure I'd even try.

3. Hitler. I've always thought it would be interesting and slightly amusing to have a giant, full wall mural of Tupac in my living room, just to spark conversation and get reactions (I'm very much white). Same type of thing.

4. No. No go-rill-a in my NFL. This would only bring us one step closer to the realization of the "Air Bud" movies, which would be tragic.

5. I'll take AIC for $100, Alex. I don't mind the band, but more to the point of the exercise is that for my soul mate, with all that that usually implies, I'd sacrifice the enjoyment of music for her pain.

6. Nope, no dream VCR for me. I don't mind not knowing, and it could reveal thoughts about people about which I'd rather they remain clueless.

7. Clearly, I'd run a story about the President being an alien or a robot, whichever would be easiest to pin on him. If I really have to choose between one of the options given, I'd take Bigfoot, because Harry and the Hendersons was awesome.

8. No. I'm not this petty, I don't think. It would be almost like me always bugging my girlfriend by telling her poker stuff or her bugging me with HGTV stuff. How bad could it be?

9. No way do I read that book. The implication is that people are somehow being persuaded that they are gay. I'd rather take it up the pooper because I had an epiphany on my own, thanks.

10. Don't have the book, have the album. I'd still go with the book, since I think the written word is more expressive than an instrument.

11. Go check up on moms. How am I supposed to enjoy the movie if I'm obsessing about her death?

12. I'd give him a $50, I think. What am I, poor?

13. Myself, naturally. Thinking about past relationships, I can really see where I was being immature, or unfair, or impatient, or whatever. Not that I was always at fault, but I'd like to talk about how I'd improved as a person, and thank them for helping me along the way. By the way, can we specifically exclude the current girlfriend from this dinner? She'd flip, and also probably have to sit at a table way in the back.

14. Insulting. Even the slowest human finds Garfield insulting and unamusing. This goes double since the cats are reading at a 12th grade level.

15. I'd spend those two weeks doing things like bookmarking webpages, programming my TV, organizing meals by day, you know, making my daily routine dirt simple. If Chuck expects me to say I'd spend it gathering all the wisdom of Earth and trying to achieve enlightenment in that short time, forget it. I'd rather spend it enjoying my current life and simplifying my future one.

16. Hell no. It looks like I'll have plenty of time for CFL in the future, no need to waste my life now.

17. I trust the man with a past less. The man with no past may be good, bad, whatever, but I KNOW the man with a past isn't deserving of my trust. The devil you know versus the one in the bush, and all that.

18. 10 minutes on the moon. One day I'll be able to experience Europe in a much better fashion than a measly $2k/month. I can't say the same about the moon. Plus, all that NASA training, like the spinny thing, and the gyro thing. Awesome.

19. I immediately fall over my friend, say a bee was coming after me, and I tripped over him. Any excuse you give here is going to be lame.

20. I'd rather see the indy film. Self-awareness is maybe the most important trait (skill?) one can develop, and any help in doing so is more welcome than a more fictional Hollywood flick (which would probably star Jason Alexander in any case).

21. Earlier, by maybe as much as 3 years (18 to 15). Not only would it be easier for me to accomplish, but I wouldn't think it was such a big deal. Because its not. Unless you're 40.

22. The one about adultery. First, cheating on one's SO is something that I take that seriously, more seriously than petty theft. Two, since that one is actually true, it could conceivably be proven, or I might be forced to admit it, or something. The unfounded rumor is just that, so I'd be less worried about it.

23. I guess happy? I never thought that much of John Ritter (seriously, I never heard his name mentioned more than once a year before he died; now there's no escaping him), but he seemed like a happy, funny guy. I wouldn't be moping around all day saying, "Boy, how much does it suck that my dad is like THIS." I just don't get this question.

Chuck, will you marry me?

[RunDownHouse]

RE: the horse.

It says that the horse's head is held firmly in place, that its hooves are shackled into the ground, and that its completely immobile. I took that to mean that I couldn't buckle its legs or tip it over. Given that context, do you still try to kick it? Those things stand like 7 feet at the shoulder.

And try to think about this a little more deeply. Clearly, if it was easy to kill the horse under the given parameters, the choice would be much easier. But Chuck isn't looking for easy answers, presumably.

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If the head is held that firmly in place you may be able to break the neck. Also, hard to say if you can ONLY kick, or if that's just the most obvious tool he gives you.

I dunno, I've got a very strong kick, I think it could still be done, but it would be grisly. Does the horse have to die within the 20 minutes, or can it die later of injuries sustained?

NT