Sex in the City: Season 38, Episode 11

[SammyKid11]

Okay, so the Lexington Brian stuff at the end of the first scene OP posted was verbatim what the guy who posted about the girl who wrote about him on her blog after their date said. I don't know Sex and the City very well, so either this script is BS or his post was...probably the date post? Am I missing something?

[SammyKid11]

Duh, never mind.

[Phoenix1010]

[ QUOTE ]
Okay, so the Lexington Brian stuff at the end of the first scene OP posted was verbatim what the guy who posted about the girl who wrote about him on her blog after their date said. I don't know Sex and the City very well, so either this script is BS or his post was...probably the date post? Am I missing something?

[/ QUOTE ]

Blahahahaha

[CardSharpCook]

You mean you missed the Sex and the City episode in which Carrie got penetrated in every orafice by a guy wearing ten condoms on his fingers and toes? Instant Classic. I have it on tape if you want to borrow. Freakin Fabulous

[BreakEvenPlayer]

SCENE 5:


Carrie confronts Lexington Brian in a large meeting room at his Manhattan firm. Brian believes that they are alone in the room, but Carrie has hit the speaker button on the large conference phone in the room and FRIEND 3 has gathered all of Brian’s coworkers out in the hallway to hear the confrontation.

CARRIE: I can’t believe you said that you slept with me! That’s such bull [censored]!

LEX. BRIAN: Well I didn’t mean slept as in sex clearly. But yeah I understand that you are pissed off. In fact this whole situation shows that I was kind of bummed out because I am attracted to you and I find you different than most girls I go out with.

CARRIE: Well I’m not interested. That was a total douchebag thing to do. And I wasn’t going to sleep with you, which is clearly what you are looking for.

LEX. BRIAN: No it really isn’t at all. You know I’m not one to sleep around.

CARRIE: “Stick it in her pooper.” They say romance is dead.

LEX. BRIAN: Those people are idiots. I didn’t say that stuff. I barely even know those guys.

CARRIE: Please don’t talk to me anymore.

LEX. BRIAN: Really? I really wish you would reconsider and give me a chance. Is there anything I can do?

CARRIE: I think you can borrow some of your buddies’ porn and you can stick it in their pooper… Just not with me.

Carrie gets up and walks out of the room. She opens the door to find the entire hallway lined with Brian’s coworkers, all of them had listened to the conversation.

COWORKER 1: Oh my God! You’re such a bitch. Brian is lucky this all blew up before he got any closer to you.

COWORKER 2: Wow, you totally stuck it to Brian there. But I agree, you’re a total ho-bag and he’s better off without you.

COWORKER 3: You filthy whore. Go suck down some Drain-O and then go down to the zoo and take it from a giraffe in the a$$ you slimy twat.

COWORKER 4: See this is why I hate this firm. You’re all a bunch of immature punks. Clearly this woman had every right to do what she did. You’re all a bunch of losers who need to get laid.

COWORKER 5: Shut up.

Carrie finally makes her way out of the building and heads home.

[BreakEvenPlayer]

SCENE 6:

Carrie sits on her bed, fires up her Apple iBook, and begins typing.


CARRIE VOICEOVER: Well I learned a lot today. I learned that young men are obsessed with anal sex and its vernacular. I learned that a good man is even harder to find than I previously thought. I learned that all men are essentially perverts and they will lie to get into your pants. And if they don’t manage to get into your pants they will lie to their friends anyway and say they did. I learned that Monty’s on 34th and Brookshire brews a fabulous Double Mocha Ice Blendachino. I learned that I should carry more than a couple spare condoms in my purse, in case I run into that special guy. Ah… but that’s life isn’t it? This fabulous game we play. (smiles to herself, nods head, closes iBook)


END

[CardSharpCook]

ROFL. Nice twist at the end. OOTiots.

[2+2 wannabe]

[ QUOTE ]
ROFL. Nice twist at the end. OOTiots.

[/ QUOTE ]

this was clearly the funniest part of the story

very well done

[cdxx]

everyone should read this tomorrow.

[tom441lbk]

[ QUOTE ]
You mean you missed the Sex and the City episode in which Carrie got penetrated in every orafice by a guy wearing ten condoms on his fingers and toes? Instant Classic. I have it on tape if you want to borrow. Freakin Fabulous

[/ QUOTE ]


you...ummmm.uhh..want to get together some time...and um.....watch it...?