Worst Songs Ever

[elwoodblues]

Just found on CNN...top 10 list of worst songs ever (I assume that they had to be songs that were popular but are really horrible). From worst to best:

"We Built This City," Starship
"Achy Breaky Heart," Billy Ray Cyrus
"Everybody Have Fun Tonight" Wang Chung
"Rollin'," Limp Bizkit
"Ice Ice Baby," Vanilla Ice
"The Heart of Rock & Roll," Huey Lewis and the News
"Don't Worry Be Happy," Bobby McFerrin
"Party All the Time," Eddie Murphy
"American Life," Madonna
"Ebony and Ivory," Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder.

Thoughts? Additions?

[nicky g]

Nice list. There's currently a song popular in the UK called something like "Closest thing to crazy" (that may be wrong; the chorus goes "This is the closest thing to crazy/I have ever been..."). I think it might be a cover. The singer is being hailed as a new bright young thing; goodness knows why, it's awful. Really awful, pure solid cheese. Like the worst of mid-80s sentimentality. Worse than Roxette. I suspect it's a practical joke.

Anything by Chris de Burgh is a contender. The chicken song. Any song by a soccer team. Oh there are too many...

[HDPM]

Angel Baby. Great sax solo in that one.

[nicky g]

Oh oh oh My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion (anything by Celine Dion). Anything by Madness. Anything by hippies. But most of all:

I Believe I Can Fly by whatshisface.

[adios]

[superleeds]

The worst two ever

I just called to say I love you - Stevie Wonder

The lady in red - Chris de Urrrggghhhh

[Homer]

Some of the 80's songs are so cheesy you can't help but like them.

I mean, come on, are you telling me that if you were surfing and came across Wang Chung you wouldn't stop?

[Homer]

Anything by Madness

Does Madness do that song "Our house..in the middle of the street......father wears his sunday best...etc, etc."? If so, that song rules.

[JTrout]

Kung Fu Fighting

[Homer]

Kung Fu Fighting

Oh man, no way. What a great song.

[benfranklin]

Any Worst Songs list that doesn't include "Having My Baby" by Paul Anka has zero credibility.

[Jezebel]

How can someone not like "Don't worry Be Happy"? I mean its a simple little song he wrote. Some even sing it note for note. Not the best song in the world, but far from being on a worst song list.

[whiskeytown]

We built this city by Starship definately belongs at the top, not just because of it's cheesiness, but because it marks the final downfall/metamorphsis of an incredible band - vomit central

let's see - virtually everything 80's sucked dog balls -

"Silly Love Songs" by Paul McCartney blew big time
"Heartbeat" by Don Johnson bit

but then I'll get on this kick, and I'll wanna hear Survivor do "The Karate Kid" soundtrack or something....

I have problems....I need to drink until I wipe that whole period of time from my brain cells /images/graemlins/grin.gif /images/graemlins/grin.gif

RB

[benfranklin]

[ QUOTE ]
How can someone not like "Don't worry Be Happy"?

[/ QUOTE ]

All it takes is an ear and a functioning brain cell. It is mind-numbing audio pap. White noise has more intelligent content. I'd rather listen to fingernails on a chalk board. I'd rather listen to Al Francken and Bill O'Reilly screech at each other.

[Homer]

How can someone not like "Don't worry Be Happy"?

People are jaded these days.

I bet if EcKsbOcKs or whatever the rap star of the week is called released a remake called "Dont fukin werry be fukin happe" it would be #1.

[GWB]

[ QUOTE ]
How can someone not like "Don't worry Be Happy"? I mean its a simple little song he wrote. Some even sing it note for note. Not the best song in the world, but far from being on a worst song list.

[/ QUOTE ]
Brings back memories of my Dad's campaign in 1988 - Victory was sweet!

Them liberals at CNN probably put it on the list to get at my family, the scoundrels!

W

[hetron]

[ QUOTE ]
Just found on CNN...top 10 list of worst songs ever (I assume that they had to be songs that were popular but are really horrible). From worst to best:

"We Built This City," Starship
"Achy Breaky Heart," Billy Ray Cyrus
"Everybody Have Fun Tonight" Wang Chung
"Rollin'," Limp Bizkit
"Ice Ice Baby," Vanilla Ice
"The Heart of Rock & Roll," Huey Lewis and the News
"Don't Worry Be Happy," Bobby McFerrin
"Party All the Time," Eddie Murphy
"American Life," Madonna
"Ebony and Ivory," Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder.

Thoughts? Additions?

[/ QUOTE ]

Hardly any of the songs on here belong on this list, at least in IMHO. We Built This City is definitely not the worst pop song of all time. I actually like about 6 of the songs on the list, even if they are cheese.

Any list of worst pop songs HAS to include:

The Macarena by ???
Rock On by Michael Damian
Heading for a Heartbreak by Winger
I'm Saving All My Love (for You) by Linear
Please Don't Go by ???
The rap song from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie

And please, if you are going to have a black/white song on the list it should be Wacko Jacko's "It doesn't matter if you're black or white" vs Ebony and Ivory.

[Phat Mack]

Hey, Jude (In fairness, I will limit myself to one McCartney song.)
Roxanne
Stairway to Heaven
anthing by Tool
Fire and Rain by that guy who was married to Carly Simon
OK, anything by Carly Simon
Family Tradition, Hank Williams Jr.
I don't know the name of it, but it has "Euro Trash girls" in the lyrics.
Piano Man
I Am Woman
YMCA
MacArthur Park

[hetron]

[ QUOTE ]


I Believe I Can Fly by whatshisface.

[/ QUOTE ]

If the song hadn't been so overplayed, nobody would think it is so bad. The first 150 times I heard it on the radio, I actually thought it was pretty good. It doesn't deserve a spot on a top 10 worst all time pop list.

[elwoodblues]

I still remember the SNL parody of Ebony and Ivory...

I am dark and you are light
You are blind as a bat and I have sight
Side by side you are my amigo, negro
Let's not fight

[hetron]

"If you want to be my lover" by The Spice Girls
The first backstreet boys single (don't ask me for the name)
Summer Bunnies by R Kelly (R Kelly's cheesiest lyrics ever +plus R Kelly rapping =the worst)

[snakehead]

horse with no name~america

in the year 2525~I don't remember

[blackaces13]

[ QUOTE ]
Hey, Jude (In fairness, I will limit myself to one McCartney song.)
Roxanne
Stairway to Heaven
anthing by Tool
Fire and Rain by that guy who was married to Carly Simon
OK, anything by Carly Simon
Family Tradition, Hank Williams Jr.
I don't know the name of it, but it has "Euro Trash girls" in the lyrics.
Piano Man
I Am Woman
YMCA
MacArthur Park

[/ QUOTE ]

You're kidding right? I like almost every song you put up there, and I think Tool kicks ass too. Who doesn't like Piano Man? You ever been to a bar? Stairway to Heaven, c'mon most of the songs you have there are great.

I'll give you I Am Woman but that song is not meant for guys, never heard of that Hank Williams song or the Euro Trash one, YMCA is pretty bad but at least its pretty funny and everyone can dance to it. Other than that, and MacArthur Park which I can't recall this list is all classics and good ones at that.

[Homer]

Wow, seriously. Stairway, Roxanne, Hey Jude, Piano Man are all in the good-great range.

[imported_Chuck Weinstock]

Absolutely no contest for first place...that piece of treacle
they call "You Raise Me Up".

Far behind second "You Are My Sunshine".

[Six_of_One]

[ QUOTE ]
Hey, Jude (In fairness, I will limit myself to one McCartney song.)
Stairway to Heaven
anthing by Tool
Piano Man


[/ QUOTE ]

This is a joke, right? Please tell me it's a joke, so my faith in humanity can be (temporarily) restored.

[Oski]

Mr. Roboto and Dust in the Wind

[Phat Mack]

You're kidding right?

Because there's no Elton John song on my list? I spent 30 minutes trying to think of an Elton John song that slouched head and shoulders below the rest. I just couldn't come up with one.

Who doesn't like Piano Man? You ever been to a bar?

You may be just the man for the job. What's your favorite Elton John song?

[scotnt73]

ok ill be the first to admit that if im flipping through the channels ill stop on ice ice baby. vanilla ice is a complete loser but hell i still like that song and it reminds me of cruising for girls with my friends back in high school. but i liked under pressure alot before i ever heard about vanilla.

YO WE OUT....WORD TO YA MOTHA /images/graemlins/wink.gif

[Chris Daddy Cool]

Dude, those songs are classic. He doesn't know what he's talking about.

[Rushmore]

[ QUOTE ]
anthing by Tool


[/ QUOTE ]

Dear Monkey-boy,

You are an absolute moron.

Yours,
David E. Talbot

[Rushmore]

My understanding of the question was that it was intended to elicit responses that exist in the Wester Vernacular.

Therefore, I nominate I Wanna Know What Love Is by Foreigner, Wind Beneath My Wings by Bette Midler, and Some Like It Hot (Feeeeel the heeeat!) by Robert Gordon.

How stupid ARE we, anyway?!

[Rushmore]

[daryn]

yeah under pressure is maybe on the top 10 list!

[andyfox]

Ever see Joe Piscopo doing his Frank Sinatra impression siniging "Ebony and Ivory," with Eddie Murphy as Stevie Wonder? Hilarious.

It's going to be tough to top Achy Breaky Heart.

[andyfox]

Billy Joel says that whenever he goes into a bar or restaurant where there's a piano player, when he is recognized, the piano player immediately goes into Piano Man and after playing for about 15 seconds, realizes there's no more to the song than he's already played. And that he (Joel) ran out of ideas for the lyrics, so that's where the "la-la-la-la-la-laaa" came in.

[andyfox]

. . .are played at baseball games.

The Star Spangled Banner: it starts out with a one-syllable word on the first two notes and gets worse from there; "what so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming." What is that?

Take Me Out to The Ballgame: Why say "take me out to the ballgame" when you're already there? "I don't care if I ever get back." Really?

[andyfox]

Didn't see this before I asked about it. Good memory.

Whatever happened to Joe Piscopo? Best Sinatra impression ever.

[Ed Miller]

"Africa" by Toto. That song drives me nuts.

[John Cole]

"Imagine" by John Lennon Give me a break. The guy's living in the Dakota. Anybody who takes this seriously needs a lobotomy--or worse.

"My Way" by Frank Sinatra Again, pure crap. A song especially written for idiots to request from smarmy lounge singers. Consider that the person most identified with this worthless lyric surrounded himself with yes-men, henchmen, and sycophants.

Last, but certainly not least least, that Indian song by Paul Revere and the Raiders. Not only does it include laughable sentimentality, but it features atrocious lyrics and relentlessly bad timing. A piece of crapola that smacks of every bad Hollywood composers' idea of what Indian music might sound like.

[John Cole]

Phat,

Stairway to Heaven sounds like Cole Porter compared to the three I named, but I'd put it in my top ten.

[Phat Mack]

compared to the three I named

The three you came up with are going to kill the discussion; unless, of course, we are allowed to introduce John Denver. I refuse, however, to escalate the discourse to that level.

[youtalkfunny]

[ QUOTE ]
Really awful, pure solid cheese...Worse than Roxette.

[/ QUOTE ]
Roxette is horrible, but they're one of my guilty pleasures.

The tunes are catchy, but mostly, it's the simplistic lyrics (I don't think English is their native language), and the use of about three chords. It reminds me of playing with garage bands in high school, right down to doing letting a chick sing, just because she's a chick.

As for Billy Joel, if HE'S getting sick of some of his songs, we can be excused for the same thing.

Why Billy no longer performs "Just the Way You Are", from a 60 Minutes interview:

"DON'T GOOOOOO CHANGING....i wonder what i'll have for supper...

TO TRY TO PLEASE ME...maybe i'll get a club sandwich from room service....

YOU NEVER LET ME DOWN BEFORE...but they always come soggy..."

[andyfox]

Rich Little used to do a great John Denver impression singing: "Sunshine on my shoulders makes me sunburned; and sunshine in my eyes will make me blind."

[TJSWAN]

I'm Too Sexy for My Shirt, by Right Said Fred.

And that song by Chumawaumba, I get knocked down, I get up agian blah blah blah ...... /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

Tim



Tim

[M2d]

Barbie Girl

[andyfox]

1) Debby Boone with You Light Up My Life

2) Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes with Up Where We Belong

3) Barbra Streisand with Love Theme form a Star Is Born (Evergreen)

4) Celine Dion with My Heart Will Go On

5) Stevie Wonder with I Just Called To Say I love You

6) Christopher Cross with Arther’s Theme (Best That You Can Do)

7) Barbra Streisand with The Way You Were

8) Peabo Bryson and Regina Belle with A Whole New World

9) B.J. Thomas with Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head

10) Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes with I’ve Had The Time Of My Life


You Light Up My Life and Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head stand out as particularly lame.

Dionne Warwick, who, because of early kindnesses shown to Burt Bachrach, was always given first shot to record any of his songs. And of course she had a long string of hits. She turned down Raindrops because, well, it's pretty lame.
Big mistake, of course.

[Ray Zee]

the answer is simple. all rock and roll from the 50's thru early 70's was great. then came acid rock. all music went to hell. except for certain singers who were leftovers from earlier times.
then came the crap in the 80's and 90's. including the junk i hear coming blasting out car windows thumping along. all that hip hop and crap.
in the new millenium i see some limited hope. but likely i wont find out as i listen to oldies and still have my hearing that most of you wont have when you hit 50 or more.

[Gamblor]

You got a diamond
You got nine men
You got a hat, a bat, and that's not all
You got the bleachers, got 'em from Spring 'til Fall
You got a dog, and a drink, and the umpire's call

Whattaya want? (at this point, some fans have taken to shouting, in unison, "Free Beer!")

Let's play ball!

O-K, Blue-Jays, Let's (Let's) play (play) Ball.
O-K, Blue-Jays, Let's (Let's) play (play) Ball.

Good lord.

[Tyler Durden]

[ QUOTE ]
anthing by Tool


[/ QUOTE ]

I don't know what you're smoking but I'm sure it's illegal. 'Schism' is an excellent song.

[HDPM]

I was wondering when somebody was going to drop the MOAB.

[Phat Mack]

Nobody has dropped the MOAB. No one has threatened to drop the MOAB. I merely mentioned the MOAB.

He was born when his mother drank her 27th beer
In a bar where she had never been before.
She tried to find the bathroom,
but instead he hit the floor.............

Colorado Rocky Mountain Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh

[John Cole]

I can't wait to hear My Heart Will Go On again. Dorothy Fields and Jerome Kern must be sick--whereever they are.

[kdog]

Anything by Barry Manilow.

[Rushmore]

This really says a LOT. These are awful songs, just offensively bad.

But hey--they taught me how to love again and all, so I guess they're all OK.

More evidence that this civilization is on the way out.