CrisBrown
01-02-2004, 03:18 AM
Hi All,
I thought I'd toss a question out to the field and see how others feel about this lovely game we play:
What do you lose when you lose?
There are obviously a lot of answers to this. Do you lose money? Digits in your bankroll? Self-esteem? Relative human worth? The grace of the poker gods? Nothing at all?
It sounds like a silly question, but if you're going to play poker seriously, it's not at all a silly question. Depending on how you answer it, you're may have serious problems when you hit a long losing streak (and if you haven't yet, you will).
I'm not saying there is any "right" answer, but I do think there are some vulnerable answers. I would include in that list any answer which involves your sense of self, or your worth as a human being. I used to wrestle with this. When I lost a few tourneys in a row, I'd inflict negative self-talk upon myself. God/The Universe/the poker gods were out to get me. The losses just proved that I shouldn't try to enjoy anything because it'll always turn sour. Etc. Etc.
That will do worse than put your game on tilt. It will put your life on tilt. I became withdrawn, hardly talking to my partner or children, not getting my writing done (I'm a novelist), and generally sinking into depression. And all because I lost a few poker tournaments.
Not good.
What changed for me (besides experience) was coming to the conclusion that I'm just playing for digits in a bankroll. It isn't "money" until I withdraw it. And that has really helped me.
A couple of weeks ago, I had a tough run for a few days, for a net loss of about $800. I wasn't happy about it, but neither was I all that worried. I didn't look at it as having lost three months' electric bill, or a month's groceries, or half a mortgage payment. And it certainly didn't make me any less worthy a person, a partner, or a mother. It was just digits in a bankroll, and I knew I'd win it back and more once things turned.
That change has made it a lot easier to play poker as a second job. It's no different from a commissioned sales job. You can do your very best work, and sometimes you just won't get the sale and the paycheck. And other times it's as if they're just shoveling money at you. Over the long run, your paycheck is a function of talent and plain hard work, in terms of study, focus, and self-analysis. But in the short term ... well, there's a reason they call it "gambling" and not "banking."
So ... what do you lose when you lose?
Cris
I thought I'd toss a question out to the field and see how others feel about this lovely game we play:
What do you lose when you lose?
There are obviously a lot of answers to this. Do you lose money? Digits in your bankroll? Self-esteem? Relative human worth? The grace of the poker gods? Nothing at all?
It sounds like a silly question, but if you're going to play poker seriously, it's not at all a silly question. Depending on how you answer it, you're may have serious problems when you hit a long losing streak (and if you haven't yet, you will).
I'm not saying there is any "right" answer, but I do think there are some vulnerable answers. I would include in that list any answer which involves your sense of self, or your worth as a human being. I used to wrestle with this. When I lost a few tourneys in a row, I'd inflict negative self-talk upon myself. God/The Universe/the poker gods were out to get me. The losses just proved that I shouldn't try to enjoy anything because it'll always turn sour. Etc. Etc.
That will do worse than put your game on tilt. It will put your life on tilt. I became withdrawn, hardly talking to my partner or children, not getting my writing done (I'm a novelist), and generally sinking into depression. And all because I lost a few poker tournaments.
Not good.
What changed for me (besides experience) was coming to the conclusion that I'm just playing for digits in a bankroll. It isn't "money" until I withdraw it. And that has really helped me.
A couple of weeks ago, I had a tough run for a few days, for a net loss of about $800. I wasn't happy about it, but neither was I all that worried. I didn't look at it as having lost three months' electric bill, or a month's groceries, or half a mortgage payment. And it certainly didn't make me any less worthy a person, a partner, or a mother. It was just digits in a bankroll, and I knew I'd win it back and more once things turned.
That change has made it a lot easier to play poker as a second job. It's no different from a commissioned sales job. You can do your very best work, and sometimes you just won't get the sale and the paycheck. And other times it's as if they're just shoveling money at you. Over the long run, your paycheck is a function of talent and plain hard work, in terms of study, focus, and self-analysis. But in the short term ... well, there's a reason they call it "gambling" and not "banking."
So ... what do you lose when you lose?
Cris