NEWS ALERT # 1

[Zeno]

Oslo- Today, in a grime announcement, the King of Norway declared a Jihad against the rest of Western Europe. “We are tired of being a forgotten backwater nation and will take the necessary steps to revive our ancient and noble past”, said the King. “It is time for all Norwegians to rise up and destroy the infidel Christians that robbed us of our noble and ancient beliefs and Viking heritage”, stated the King. He is calling for an all out Jihad against the main powers of Germany, France, and England first to be followed by “the complete butchery of the rest of the morbid nations of a sick and diseased Europe”. The announcement inflamed many Norwegians who took to the streets with glee screaming, “Thor is Great” and chatting ”Odin, Odin, Odin” over and over again.

[Ulysses]

I suspect this news alert might not be 100% accurate. The last sentence is the clue. I used to live in Norway, and at this time of year almost all Norwegians would respond like so:

"Jihad? Cool, good luck to us! I must go cross-country skiing now."

Plus, Sweden would always be inluded in the first phase of any Norwegian Jihad.

[Zeno]

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Plus, Sweden would always be included in the first phase of any Norwegian Jihad.

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True, but an attack on the main powers of Europe must take precedence over more historical factors, but I admit the error, add the cursed Swedes to the first hit list.


[ QUOTE ]
I suspect this news alert might not be 100% accurate

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Really? If Noam Chomsky made this announcement it would be hailed by his slavish followers as the most accurate utterance ever spoke by God or Man.



By the way, as an interesting side note - My father (mostly Norwegian) would quote an old ditty (part of a poem?) to my mother (100% Swede) at the dinner table. After dinner the family would sit around and talk and my father would tell tales and reminisce of the "old days" etc, he is a marvelous storyteller. Anyway, the ditty went, as best I can remember:

Ten thousands Swedes laid among the reeds
In the battle of Copenhagen
Ten thousand more laid along the shore
Killed by one Norwegian.

Those herring chokers go berserk sometimes. /images/graemlins/smirk.gif

-Zeno