HUSKER'66
10-24-2003, 05:57 PM
Need to post this to get back on quota......
There are a lot of things to love about living in Texas, the following are not included on that list.
1) When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone. (good reason not to take a train through Texas)
2)You can be legally married by publicly introducing a person as your husband or wife 3 times. (Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! )
3)It is illegal to drive without windshield wipers. You don't need to have a windshield, but you must have the wipers. (apparently this doesn't apply to motorcycles)
4)It is illegal to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel. (second story of your house is ok, as well as the first, third, fourth, floor etc. of a hotel)
5)It is illegal to milk another person's cow.(that is udderly rediculous )
6)A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give thier victims 24 hour notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed. (don't ask me.....)
7)It is illegal for a person to consume an alcoholic beverage while operating a motor vehicle upon a public roadway, if the person is observed doing so by a peace officer.(guess it's ok if your spotted by the neighbors-as long as their not cops )
8)speaking of alcohol-the entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.(guess it's ok to make "moonshine"?!)
9)Abilene Tx-it is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city for the purpose of flirting or mashing (I'm never going to Abilene...)
10)Austin Tx- it is illegal to carry wire cutters in your pocket.
11)Beaumont Tx- collegiate football is banned at Lamar University
12)Clarendon Tx- it is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster (but your still allowed to tickle your better halfs a$$ with a feather )
13)El Paso Tx- Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms, railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons "of a kind and number to efficiently contain expectorations in them".(just don't spit on the sidewalk...)
14)Houston- beer may not be purchased after midnight Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday.
15)Houston- It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.
16)Jasper Tx- dogs must be on a leash at ALL TIMES. Fine of $100.00
17)LeFors Tx- It is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer while standing.
18)Lubbock county-It is illegal to drive within arm's length of alcohol-including alcohol in someone else's blood stream.(it would pay to have really, really short arms)
19)Mesquite Tx- it is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
20)Port Arthur Tx- Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in a elevator.
21)Richardson Tx- It is now illegal to place a "for sale" sign on a car if it is visible from the street.(they don't sell many cars in Richardson.....)
22)Richardson-It is illegal to do "U" turns.(but you allowed to do semi circle turns )
23)Temple Tx- No one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square.
24)You can ride your horse in the salloon however.
25)Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot.
26)Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights.(have'nt figured out if they mean the horse or rider....)
You gotta love it.......
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There are a lot of things to love about living in Texas, the following are not included on that list.
1) When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone. (good reason not to take a train through Texas)
2)You can be legally married by publicly introducing a person as your husband or wife 3 times. (Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! )
3)It is illegal to drive without windshield wipers. You don't need to have a windshield, but you must have the wipers. (apparently this doesn't apply to motorcycles)
4)It is illegal to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel. (second story of your house is ok, as well as the first, third, fourth, floor etc. of a hotel)
5)It is illegal to milk another person's cow.(that is udderly rediculous )
6)A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give thier victims 24 hour notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed. (don't ask me.....)
7)It is illegal for a person to consume an alcoholic beverage while operating a motor vehicle upon a public roadway, if the person is observed doing so by a peace officer.(guess it's ok if your spotted by the neighbors-as long as their not cops )
8)speaking of alcohol-the entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.(guess it's ok to make "moonshine"?!)
9)Abilene Tx-it is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city for the purpose of flirting or mashing (I'm never going to Abilene...)
10)Austin Tx- it is illegal to carry wire cutters in your pocket.
11)Beaumont Tx- collegiate football is banned at Lamar University
12)Clarendon Tx- it is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster (but your still allowed to tickle your better halfs a$$ with a feather )
13)El Paso Tx- Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms, railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons "of a kind and number to efficiently contain expectorations in them".(just don't spit on the sidewalk...)
14)Houston- beer may not be purchased after midnight Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday.
15)Houston- It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.
16)Jasper Tx- dogs must be on a leash at ALL TIMES. Fine of $100.00
17)LeFors Tx- It is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer while standing.
18)Lubbock county-It is illegal to drive within arm's length of alcohol-including alcohol in someone else's blood stream.(it would pay to have really, really short arms)
19)Mesquite Tx- it is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
20)Port Arthur Tx- Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in a elevator.
21)Richardson Tx- It is now illegal to place a "for sale" sign on a car if it is visible from the street.(they don't sell many cars in Richardson.....)
22)Richardson-It is illegal to do "U" turns.(but you allowed to do semi circle turns )
23)Temple Tx- No one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square.
24)You can ride your horse in the salloon however.
25)Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot.
26)Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights.(have'nt figured out if they mean the horse or rider....)
You gotta love it.......
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