07-05-2002, 05:06 PM
You live in California when...
1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.
3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
4. You actually know how to eat an artichoke.
5. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.
6. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.
You live in New York City when...
1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.
2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.
3. You can get into a four hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.
4. You think Central Park is a good example of nature.
5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multilingual.
6. You've actually worn out a car horn.
7. You think eye contact is an extreme act of aggression.
You live in Minnesota when...
1. You only have four spices:salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.
2. All of your kids Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
3. You actually have more than one recipe for moose.
4. Sexy lingerie is anything in heavy flannel with tear away Velcro fasteners (yikes!)
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.
You live in the Deep South when...
1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
2."Ya'll" is singular and "All Ya'll" is plural.
3. After five years you still hear, "You'ins ain't from 'round here, are Y'all?"
4. "He needed a good killin' " is STILL a valid defense in court.
5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty Jean, etc.
You live in Colorado when...
1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
2. You tell your husband to pick up little "Granola" on his way home and he stops at the day care center (It's your kid's name).
3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.
You live in the Midwest when...
1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
4. You end sentences with a preposition: " Where's my coat at?"
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was REAL different!"
You live in Florida when...
1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind even houses and cars.
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people (i.e. retired old ladies so short you don't see the top of their heads.)
1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.
3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
4. You actually know how to eat an artichoke.
5. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.
6. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.
You live in New York City when...
1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.
2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.
3. You can get into a four hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.
4. You think Central Park is a good example of nature.
5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multilingual.
6. You've actually worn out a car horn.
7. You think eye contact is an extreme act of aggression.
You live in Minnesota when...
1. You only have four spices:salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.
2. All of your kids Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
3. You actually have more than one recipe for moose.
4. Sexy lingerie is anything in heavy flannel with tear away Velcro fasteners (yikes!)
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.
You live in the Deep South when...
1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
2."Ya'll" is singular and "All Ya'll" is plural.
3. After five years you still hear, "You'ins ain't from 'round here, are Y'all?"
4. "He needed a good killin' " is STILL a valid defense in court.
5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty Jean, etc.
You live in Colorado when...
1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
2. You tell your husband to pick up little "Granola" on his way home and he stops at the day care center (It's your kid's name).
3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.
You live in the Midwest when...
1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
4. You end sentences with a preposition: " Where's my coat at?"
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was REAL different!"
You live in Florida when...
1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind even houses and cars.
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people (i.e. retired old ladies so short you don't see the top of their heads.)