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View Full Version : "No, I am... crazy, and I need a menthol cigarette."

bisonbison
12-31-2005, 12:33 PM
This story made me incredibly happy this morning.

http://www.pennlive.com/news/patriotnews/index.ssf?/base/news/1135851671239760.xml&coll=1

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A Central Dauphin School District teacher... Curtis Lofton, 23, of Springford Terraces, Lower Paxton Twp., was arrested early in the evening of Dec. 10 after a neighbor called police to report a disturbance, court documents say.

Lower Paxton Twp. police said that when they arrived to investigate the disturbance, they found Lofton standing stark naked in the snow...

According to court papers, when Lofton was asked if he was okay, he responded, "No, I am ... crazy, and I need a menthol cigarette."

When asked where he lived and why he was naked, Lofton is alleged to have said that he was "Jesus Christ" and that the officer must be "God," court papers say.

A scuffle broke out between the two men during which Lofton is alleged to have hit the officer over the head with a long plastic toy trumpet which he scooped up from nearby.

The officer used his pepper spray on Lofton, at first to no avail. Then a cursing Lofton advised the officer that "'Jesus' is now blind," court papers say...

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Larimani
12-31-2005, 12:49 PM
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don't think it affects his ability to be a French teacher and it wasn't school-related, so we're hoping we can get him back to work," McGowan said.

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WTF?
12-31-2005, 01:16 PM
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don't think it affects his ability to be a French teacher and it wasn't school-related, so we're hoping we can get him back to work," McGowan said.

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WTF?

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The school can't discriminate against / fire you just because you think you're Jesus. Many schizophrenics lead very successful lives with the right care.
Larimani
12-31-2005, 01:18 PM
W00t?? Are you serious??! That's mad! I mean the guy was dancing around naked in the snow saying he's jesus... I wouldn't want my kid to be taught by this teacher.
CallMeIshmael
12-31-2005, 01:18 PM
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The school can't discriminate against / fire you just because you think you're Jesus.

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WTF?

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asofel
12-31-2005, 01:23 PM
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The school can't discriminate against / fire you just because you think you're Jesus.

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WTF?

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Its a matter of who you THINK you are. If you think you're Jesus, well, he was a pretty groovy guy. Now, if you think you're Hitler, you can kiss that job goodbye.
Los Feliz Slim
12-31-2005, 01:30 PM
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The school can't discriminate against / fire you just because you think you're Jesus.

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WTF?

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Its a matter of who you THINK you are. If you think you're Jesus, well, he was a pretty groovy guy. Now, if you think you're Hitler, you can kiss that job goodbye.

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You can teach Hitler but you can't be him, you can BE Jesus, but you can't teach him. That's a good motto for life I think.
12-31-2005, 01:30 PM
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Then a cursing Lofton advised the officer that "'Jesus' is now blind,"

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this is just too funny really



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well, he was a pretty groovy guy.

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you crack me up
Yeti
12-31-2005, 02:32 PM
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Lofton is alleged to have hit the officer over the head with a long plastic toy trumpet which he scooped up from nearby.


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Wow, you could not write this. Excellent!
shant
12-31-2005, 02:39 PM
Really rad article.
asofel
12-31-2005, 03:03 PM
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Then a cursing Lofton advised the officer that "'Jesus' is now blind,"

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this is just too funny really



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well, he was a pretty groovy guy.

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you crack me up

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Inside?
asofel
12-31-2005, 03:07 PM
[ QUOTE ]
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The school can't discriminate against / fire you just because you think you're Jesus.

[/ QUOTE ]

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WTF?

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

Its a matter of who you THINK you are. If you think you're Jesus, well, he was a pretty groovy guy. Now, if you think you're Hitler, you can kiss that job goodbye.

[/ QUOTE ]

You can teach Hitler but you can't be him, you can BE Jesus, but you can't teach him. That's a good motto for life I think.

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Word, man. Word.
Lazymeatball
12-31-2005, 04:21 PM
maybe this guy drinks Yuengling