# of Views says you like jokes better OK, Joke 1

Tarzan & Jane


When Jane initially met Tarzan of the jungle, she was attracted to him, and during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex. "Tarzan not know sex," he replied. Jane explained to him what sex was. Tarzan said, "Oh,...Tarzan use hole in trunk of tree." Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have it all wrong,...but I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothing and laid down on the ground. "Here" she said, "you must put it in here." Tarzan removed his loincloth showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped closer, and then gave her a mighty kick right in the crotch! Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually she managed to gasp for air and screamed: "What did you do that for?" "Tarzan check for squirrel!"

Airline ticket


A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."

On the bus


A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following: "Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."


"You foul-mouthed swine, " retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!" "Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' about a sexa? I'm a

justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."


I BET YOU'LL READ IT TWICE!!!