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12-05-2005, 10:04 PM
I thought you OOTers might find this interesting.

Quote from a thread in the Psychology forums:

[ QUOTE ]
I'm a caucasion American in college and my new girlfriend is Japanese -- she's here for college and has been here about 5 years. I made her my girlfriend but neither of us are really sure what that means. Anyway I like her and I'm pretty sure she likes me, but she's very cautious when it comes to relationships. I think this has to do with her being a traditional Japanese girl. So, to make a long story short, she always wants to spend time with me but I can't get physical with her at all. I'm embarrassed to say that after 3 weeks of dating the most I've done was kiss her on the cheek. Am I wrong for wanting too much too soon?

The thing is, she is a quality girl and I like that - I could dump her and get a girl who would be easier, but she wouldn't be of the same pedigree. But the problem is I can't let this go on forever and I don't want a platonic relationship.

Any general advice or information on Japanese customs would be appreciated. I'll post more details upon request.

[/ QUOTE ]

Link (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=0&Number=4109762&page=0&fpart=all &vc=1) to the thread.

BTW, I'm new here, so if linking to someone else's post in another forum is inappropriate, then I'm sorry and I won't do it again /images/graemlins/grin.gif.

miajag81
12-05-2005, 10:06 PM
Tell him to do a google search for "tubgirl" for some clues as to what Japanese girls are into.

daryn
12-05-2005, 10:08 PM
dude, 3 weeks is nothing. why do people think you gotta be banging right away or else you're done for?

i need a japanese gf

miajag81
12-05-2005, 10:09 PM
as for a serious response....

darynisright

TheMainEvent
12-05-2005, 10:11 PM
This is certainly the first I've heard of this 'Japanese girls being prudes' business. Anyone have more insight here?

soko
12-05-2005, 10:13 PM
[ QUOTE ]
dude, 3 weeks is nothing. why do people think you gotta be banging right away or else you're done for?

i need a japanese gf

[/ QUOTE ]

If a chick won't let you get past a cheek kiss after 3 weeks there is something WRONG. that is not waiting, that is repressing, unnatural.

EDIT: It would be different if the feeling was mutual but the physical aspect of a relationship is just as important as the physical, if one partner is not being fulfilled in all the ways they feel they deserve it is not healthy.

miajag81
12-05-2005, 10:16 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
dude, 3 weeks is nothing. why do people think you gotta be banging right away or else you're done for?

i need a japanese gf

[/ QUOTE ]

If a chick won't let you get past a cheek kiss after 3 weeks there is something WRONG. that is not waiting, that is repressing, unnatural.

[/ QUOTE ]

It could just as easily be him being afraid to make any other sort of move for fear of offending her or whatever. I think we need more information before we can make that judgment.

daryn
12-05-2005, 10:19 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
dude, 3 weeks is nothing. why do people think you gotta be banging right away or else you're done for?

i need a japanese gf

[/ QUOTE ]

If a chick won't let you get past a cheek kiss after 3 weeks there is something WRONG. that is not waiting, that is repressing, unnatural.

[/ QUOTE ]

It could just as easily be him being afraid to make any other sort of move for fear of offending her or whatever. I think we need more information before we can make that judgment.

[/ QUOTE ]

exactly

Colonel Kataffy
12-05-2005, 10:19 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
dude, 3 weeks is nothing. why do people think you gotta be banging right away or else you're done for?

i need a japanese gf

[/ QUOTE ]



If a chick won't let you get past a cheek kiss after 3 weeks there is something WRONG. that is not waiting, that is repressing, unnatural.

[/ QUOTE ]

It could just as easily be him being afraid to make any other sort of move for fear of offending her or whatever. I think we need more information before we can make that judgment.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is very true. More info please. Chances are he isn't aggressive/willing-to-walk enough for her to want to want to be kissed. Hopefully he isn't asking for permission.

johnnybeef
12-05-2005, 10:42 PM
[ QUOTE ]
dude, 3 weeks is nothing. why do people think you gotta be banging right away or else you're done for?

i need a japanese gf

[/ QUOTE ]

because we are horny.

imitation
12-05-2005, 11:26 PM
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.

Colonel Kataffy
12-05-2005, 11:31 PM
[ QUOTE ]
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.

[/ QUOTE ]

I love how OOT is completely devoid of feminists.

12-06-2005, 12:53 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.

[/ QUOTE ]

I love how OOT is completely devoid of feminists.

[/ QUOTE ]

Here is a group I am a member of that might interest you if you like feminists. ( I don't know if you have to be a member of facebook or not...)

here (http://loyola.facebook.com/group_profile.php?gid=2658)

Colonel Kataffy
12-06-2005, 12:56 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.

[/ QUOTE ]

I love how OOT is completely devoid of feminists.

[/ QUOTE ]

Here is a group I am a member of that might interest you if you like feminists. ( I don't know if you have to be a member of facebook or not...)

here (http://loyola.facebook.com/group_profile.php?gid=2658)

[/ QUOTE ]

Oops, I wasn't trying to be sarchastic. I actually love how you can type someting, like above, and not immediately get hounded by feminists. As far as I can tell, this is unique to twoplustwo and football practice.

12-06-2005, 01:00 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.

[/ QUOTE ]

I love how OOT is completely devoid of feminists.

[/ QUOTE ]

Here is a group I am a member of that might interest you if you like feminists. ( I don't know if you have to be a member of facebook or not...)

here (http://loyola.facebook.com/group_profile.php?gid=2658)

[/ QUOTE ]

Oops, I wasn't trying to be sarchastic. I actually love how you can type someting, like above, and not immediately get hounded by feminists. As far as I can tell, this is unique to twoplustwo and football practice.

[/ QUOTE ]

I know, isn't it great? I don't have to worry about pc police as much here.

pokerjoker
12-06-2005, 01:41 AM
I am dating a japanese girl...born in japan...raised in japan. I lived in Japan with her this summer. The reason ur girl is not having sex with u is definately not cause she it japanese.

It could just be her own family or moral values. I would have to know the individual girl to give you advice but as a general read I would treat her just like any american (or whereever u want) girl that doesnt want to have sex right away.

pokerjoker
12-06-2005, 01:42 AM
[ QUOTE ]
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.

[/ QUOTE ]

yup.

Mr_J
12-06-2005, 01:44 AM
FWIW the japanese girls I've met have been freaks.

craig r
12-06-2005, 01:47 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I made her my girlfriend but neither of us are really sure what that means.

[/ QUOTE ]

What does he mean, I "made her" his girlfriend? You can do that?

craig

craig r
12-06-2005, 01:48 AM
[ QUOTE ]
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.

[/ QUOTE ]

How old are these girls? What do you mean "push yourself on them?"

craig

Escape
12-06-2005, 03:09 AM
Most likely <13

ChipWrecked
12-06-2005, 03:13 AM
Wonders never cease, I'm actually waiting for KKF to weigh in on this.

craig r
12-06-2005, 03:14 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Most likely <13

[/ QUOTE ]

Before junk mail filters were semi "decent", I got an email from some site that said something to the effect: "If you can suck it, fck it, eat it, or beat it, then Thailand is the place for you." It then went on to tell me that I can (once again this is from memory), "choose ANY (bold was theirs) sex or age that I want."

I don't think this is "PC" to think this is fcked up.

craig

ChipWrecked
12-06-2005, 03:18 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Most likely <13

[/ QUOTE ]

Before junk mail filters were semi "decent", I got an email from some site that said something to the effect: "If you can suck it, fck it, eat it, or beat it, then Thailand is the place for you." It then went on to tell me that I can (once again this is from memory), "choose ANY (bold was theirs) sex or age that I want."

I don't think this is "PC" to think this is fcked up.

craig

[/ QUOTE ]

Sounds right. IIRC, Australian single men wanting to travel to Thailand must prove a legitimate reason before being granted a visa. This was Oz' way of throwing the Thais a bone because their men were ruining Bangkok.

Blarg
12-06-2005, 03:22 AM
That's strange. Tourism is no longer a valid reason?

It's hard to even picture tourism being either valid or invalid. It just doesn't seem to fall into that kind of category.

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 06:15 AM
[ QUOTE ]
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.

[/ QUOTE ]

Holla.

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 06:17 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I would treat her just like any american (or whereever u want) girl that doesnt want to have sex right away.

[/ QUOTE ]

Im guessing OP would have a hard time if this situation arose with an american girl.

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 06:20 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Most likely <13

[/ QUOTE ]

Before junk mail filters were semi "decent", I got an email from some site that said something to the effect: "If you can suck it, fck it, eat it, or beat it, then Thailand is the place for you." It then went on to tell me that I can (once again this is from memory), "choose ANY (bold was theirs) sex or age that I want."

I don't think this is "PC" to think this is fcked up.

craig

[/ QUOTE ]

Sounds right. IIRC, Australian single men wanting to travel to Thailand must prove a legitimate reason before being granted a visa. This was Oz' way of throwing the Thais a bone because their men were ruining Bangkok.

[/ QUOTE ]

i-g-n-o-r-a-n-t a-m-e-r-i-c-a-n ?

ChipWrecked
12-06-2005, 06:55 AM
[ QUOTE ]
That's strange. Tourism is no longer a valid reason?

It's hard to even picture tourism being either valid or invalid. It just doesn't seem to fall into that kind of category.

[/ QUOTE ]

An Australian male travelling abroad is often not a 'tourist' (though it appears visa regs have lightened since the 'sex travel' laws started in Oz in '94):

McMenamin says Australian men are among the world's worst child sex offenders. Australians hold the dubious honour of being the first Westerners charged with sex abuse of minors in several countries including Thailand, the Philippines, Fiji, Samoa and East Timor. Australian child sex offenders have been identified in a further 20 countries.

Wherever child prostitution occurs as an industry, McMenamin says, large numbers of Australian men can be found. And it is not just the traditional fleshpots such as Thailand and the Philippines where men travel to have sex with children.

"What's notable about Australians is the sheer number of destinations they turn up in. Americans tend to appear in central America, while Germans and European paedophiles seem to turn up in pockets of Asia," McMenamin says. "But Australian men turn up everywhere. They operate underage brothels in the Philippines. They even get caught in First World countries such as the US."


link (http://www.ecpat.org.nz/whatsnew-pacific10122003.html)

*******************************
To combat child sex tourism, Australia introduced laws that provide for jail terms for Australian citizens and residents who engage in sexual activity with children in foreign countries. The laws are contained in the Crimes (Child Sex Tourism) Amendment Act 1994 that came into force on 5 July 1994.




link (http://www.smartraveller.gov.au/zw-cgi/view/TravelBulletins/Helping_to_Fight_Child_Sex_Crimes_Abroad)

imitation
12-06-2005, 07:06 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Most likely <13

[/ QUOTE ]

Before junk mail filters were semi "decent", I got an email from some site that said something to the effect: "If you can suck it, fck it, eat it, or beat it, then Thailand is the place for you." It then went on to tell me that I can (once again this is from memory), "choose ANY (bold was theirs) sex or age that I want."

I don't think this is "PC" to think this is fcked up.

craig

[/ QUOTE ]

Sounds right. IIRC, Australian single men wanting to travel to Thailand must prove a legitimate reason before being granted a visa. This was Oz' way of throwing the Thais a bone because their men were ruining Bangkok.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not true, all Australians get an immediate 1month visa with for no fee at the border, UNLIKE Americans.

These girls were all 21+, I was 21 at the time (I am 22 now). Foreigners represent less than 5% of the sex trade in Thailand which has a long long established instituition of sex trade.

I have 2 friends in long term relationships with japanese girls here in china, and one friend who has married at thai girl all of them are in there 20s. And the girls all echo the same comment, asian girls often need to be pushed a lot. I know it sounds strange, but remember these are girls who have willingly invited you into their houses, bedrooms then suddenly freeze up, so i'm not implying some kind of miscommunication or the like as they'll be more than into it once the action gets going.

FWIW I didn't [censored] 80% of the girls I brought home because it felt wrong to me to push them like that....and I have a girlfriend in another country but that's another story.

In China there is hookers, sly massage places everywhere, Asian culture is really very blase about prostitution and very very few of their clients (I would guess less than .01% are foreigners). Remember that before the 1911 revolution in China when they were under feudal rule, women were considered almost possesions of men.

This is not a judgement on China or Asian culture, because I think it is far superior to American culture.

Beer and Pizza
12-06-2005, 07:17 AM
There may be a big dose of racism in this girl. Many Americans don't realize just how much racism there is in Japan towards non-Japanese cultures. Many parents would fall over dead if their daughter ever married a non-Japanese.

There are people in Japan whose ancestors came from Korea 5 generations ago who are still considered foreigners and unclean for a Japanese girl to marry. The same rules apply to Chinese, Philipinos and all Western cultures.

Now, as in all societies, there are young people who reject the racism of their parents, and they will intermarry, but a large segment of the society continues to abide by the "pure Japanese only" standard.

In all likelihood, your girl comes from a purist family, but she must adapt to being surrounded by non-Japanese. So she allows herself to have a close male friend, but he (the 2+2er mentioned in your story) will never violate her Japanese purity.

He should move on.

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 07:18 AM
A westerner was recently arrested in Thailand for sleeping with a 17 year old girl. I am sure that child prostitution exists in Thailand, because it exists everywhere in the world. And of course, its more of a problem in poorer countries. But it certainly is not out in the open. The media exagerates it greatly, and always uses Thailand because it gets the most tourists. Its well known that this is a bigger problem in Cambodia, but Cambodia in the headline doesnt sound as good, does it?

also, americans get free visa at border too.

diebitter
12-06-2005, 07:18 AM
[ QUOTE ]
violate her Japanese purity

[/ QUOTE ]

I just have to work this phrase into a conversation today...

craig r
12-06-2005, 07:21 AM
[ QUOTE ]
being one who is living in china, and travelled a little in asia though not specifically in japan. I can tell you, you have to force yourself onto the girl. I brought a girl back every night I was in thailand, but they'd just lie there and giggle and act all prude, you really have to just push yourself onto them. They just don't want to seem like sluts, but they love the cock that's for sure.


[/ QUOTE ]

You used the words "force yourself onto the girl." I don't know how, in any context, using those exact words, that does not qualify as rape. I am honestly trying real hard right now, but I can't.

[ QUOTE ]
And the girls all echo the same comment, asian girls often need to be pushed a lot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Here, you use the words "pushed a lot". Now, that seems a little bit better than "force yourself on", but it still seems very strange to me. If by "push a lot" you mean kissing, touching, foreplay, etc...to get them into the mood, then I think you need to use different words. If you mean "push a lot" or "force yourself upon" by basically throwing them on the bed, and fcking them, I don't see how this is not "rape".

FWIW, women have been known to be raped and not fight it at all and just lay there and hope it will end soon. Some of these girls will even go as far as cum (though that is rare). I don't see how these girls can be shy/prude, then you start fcking them, and then they are "getting into it." Do you mean they get on top and fck you? Do you mean they make noise? What do you mean by "more than into it?"

I don't know if it is just the language you are using and I am completely misunderstanding what you are saying or if you are in some fcked up way justifying rape. I am also not passing any type of judgement on you, but, I am also having a hard time understanding this.

craig

craig r
12-06-2005, 07:29 AM
[ QUOTE ]
A westerner was recently arrested in Thailand for sleeping with a 17 year old girl. I am sure that child prostitution exists in Thailand, because it exists everywhere in the world. And of course, its more of a problem in poorer countries. But it certainly is not out in the open. The media exagerates it greatly, and always uses Thailand because it gets the most tourists. Its well known that this is a bigger problem in Cambodia, but Cambodia in the headline doesnt sound as good, does it?

also, americans get free visa at border too.

[/ QUOTE ]

FWIW, when I mentioned Thailand, I was just using that as one example of a place that enslaves young girls/boys. I also don't think that it is limited to just Asia. Mexico and South American countries have fairly large sex slaves and sex trades (I feel there is a difference since "trade" somehow conjures up the idea of the "slave" not staying in his/her country).

When you say the media exaggerates it greatly, did you mean Thailand or the sex trade/slave trade in general. If it is the later, I don't think it is mentioned enough. The figures of underage boys/girls that are forced into sexual acts with numerous partners for payment is sickening. The true numbers will never be known, because no country wants to be known for in anyway condoning something like this. I remember reading estimations and the numbers were large. I just don't understand why there isn't more being done about this.

craig

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 07:30 AM
i think imitation just used bad wording.

craig r
12-06-2005, 07:33 AM
[ QUOTE ]
i think imitation just used bad wording.

[/ QUOTE ]

Like I said, I have not passed any type of judgement. But, that would be twice he used bad wording. He also mentioned that he felt strange pushing them. The guy in no way has to justify himself to me, but if he is going to come on a message board and say that asian women need to be "forced upon" then he should have to explain himself. He is taking an entire culture and saying this about them. Personally, I think it is a euphemism "forced upon" or "pushing them", but I am really trying to give him the benefit of the doubt here.

craig

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 07:42 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
A westerner was recently arrested in Thailand for sleeping with a 17 year old girl. I am sure that child prostitution exists in Thailand, because it exists everywhere in the world. And of course, its more of a problem in poorer countries. But it certainly is not out in the open. The media exagerates it greatly, and always uses Thailand because it gets the most tourists. Its well known that this is a bigger problem in Cambodia, but Cambodia in the headline doesnt sound as good, does it?

also, americans get free visa at border too.

[/ QUOTE ]

FWIW, when I mentioned Thailand, I was just using that as one example of a place that enslaves young girls/boys. I also don't think that it is limited to just Asia. Mexico and South American countries have fairly large sex slaves and sex trades (I feel there is a difference since "trade" somehow conjures up the idea of the "slave" not staying in his/her country).

When you say the media exaggerates it greatly, did you mean Thailand or the sex trade/slave trade in general. If it is the later, I don't think it is mentioned enough. The figures of underage boys/girls that are forced into sexual acts with numerous partners for payment is sickening. The true numbers will never be known, because no country wants to be known for in anyway condoning something like this. I remember reading estimations and the numbers were large. I just don't understand why there isn't more being done about this.

craig

[/ QUOTE ]

The media exaggerates the role westerners play. For every western child sex offender abroad, there are thousands of local offenders. Its sick and disgusting that westerns particapate in this crap, but stopping the westerners doing it is only a microscopic piece of the puzzle.

So then why do these articles all focus on the westerners who get caught doing this crap? For the most part, I find the articles written mostly for shock value, which is why Thailand or Mexico makes a stronger headline than Cambodia or Bolivia.

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 07:49 AM
Traditional Asian familes are much much much much more conservative then your typical American family. I think this is obvious. Also, for a girl to lose her virginity is a big thing to them. Asian men absolutely obsess over a girl being a virgin or not. If she gives herself to you, she is expecting alot in turn. You dont want to hurt some sweet girl, so often youll end up just watching TV. No big deal.

craig r
12-06-2005, 07:56 AM
I don't know if Westerners make up a smaller % than what is discussed in the media. The media might discuss it more because these are business men (sometimes very wealthy) who fly half-way around the world to fck young kids. And it isn't just business men either. Getting to Thailand isn't expensive (relatively) and staying there is cheap. You can have access to almost anything for relatively cheap and get away with it (just like most other Asian countries that are friendly towards the West). These men know they can get away with it in these countries much easier than they can in the states (I also am certain that the sex trade happens in the U.S.; sometimes the children are foreign and other times they are Americans). Prostitution is huge in all major cities in the U.S., but why is it talked about the most in regards to Nevada? Because it is legal in some parts. And in places like Vegas, where it isn't legal, cops definitely turn a blind eye much more than other cities.

Also, rape/molestation in general is always discussed incorrectly with the media in the U.S. Most people are raped/molested by people they know somehow, not the stranger on the street. Most boys are raped by straight men, but certain groups don't want homosexuals around boys in a teaching type of setting (I am not saying that homosexuals never rape young boys, I am just saying that straight men rape young boys more often).

But, the media misconstruing of Thailand and other parts of Asia wasn't necessarily my concern with this thread. It was more the wording used by one of the posters of "forcing himself" on a girl.

craig

craig r
12-06-2005, 08:23 AM
Also, this will be my final post on this before Imitation or somebody else responds, but I know I am always a smartass on here, especially when it comes to drugs and what not. And most of the time I am completely joking, but it truly does bother me to hear or know about anybody being in a situation that is truly traumatic that they can't get out of (and in some cases just feel like they can't get out of, but actually can; i.e. drug abuse and the like). So, things like the sex trade, slave trade, rape, battered women (though this could qualify as a situation that they feel like they can't get out of), torture, child abuse, etc... truly bother me a lot. I don't consider disdain for these things "PC" or "bleeding heart liberalism". I feel that most people are truly sickened by these types of things, but just block them out or do not know about them.

There is also a bit of guilt involved for me as well. When I first went to college I was going to get a philosophy degree, but then decided I wanted to counsel abused (sexually, physically, and emotionally) abused children and adults. I found that I could not disassoicate myself enough from the situation in order to be effective at something like this. I don't know how sex crimes police and other types of counselors are able to do this. So, other than studying these types of things in great detail, I basically have no support (other than monetary) to give to any types of abused victims. But, if I think that something like this may be happening, I do not hesitate to try to find out. </end rant and personal quibble>

craig

ChipWrecked
12-06-2005, 08:25 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I don't know how sex crimes police and other types of counselors are able to do this.

[/ QUOTE ]

Often they have been victims themselves.

craig r
12-06-2005, 08:31 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I don't know how sex crimes police and other types of counselors are able to do this.

[/ QUOTE ]

Often they have been victims themselves.

[/ QUOTE ]

Other than an alcoholic father, I know nothing of abuse, so maybe this is why. But, wouldn't you think that a victim would have an even harder time seperating him/herself from the crime/victim.

My theory on police officers that handle sex crimes is that they might be unfeeling towards the victims. Almost to the point of a sociopath/psychopath. This is just a theory, but I don't know how one can see what they see and not lose their minds (of course, maybe many do). Soldiers are taught not to think of their enemies as humans, because it is very tough for human beings to kill other human beings, so maybe sex crimes police are taught some of the same methods. They don't look at the victims as human beings, but crimes that need to be solved. This is all conjecture though. Maybe I am just a pssy and couldn't handle it without my emotions getting in the way.

craig

edit for: Maybe you are right that a lot of them were victims. Since I somewhat know what it is like to be an addict, I can talk to them and feel compassion and want to help them, but not let my emotions get the best of me. Maybe it is the same type of thing (of course there is a difference between seeing someone strung out and seeing some of the things sex police see).

ChipWrecked
12-06-2005, 08:33 AM
Victims identify with other victims; and if they have been successful at 'getting over it' they often want to help others who are in their prior situation.

craig r
12-06-2005, 08:35 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Victims identify with other victims; and if they have been successful at 'getting over it' they often want to help others who are in their prior situation.

[/ QUOTE ]

I was editing my statement as you posted your's.

craig

imitation
12-06-2005, 08:57 AM
I'm sorry can't find the right words to describe what I'm trying to say other than that they certainly aren't as forwarded as western girls i've been with and need a certain amount more pushing/coaxing into it, I can't think of better words to use, and obviously i'm not raping girls, these are girls who invited me back to their places or drove me home on their motorbikes and came into my house and lay down beside me. I'm just saying they get naked in your bed and guy quite peculiar, similarly these girls weren't virgins. Also thai girls don't kiss in public, and many chinese girls in most of the smaller citys show very little public affection.

But I will assure you they get into it once it's on, I don't really know how to describe it and since in Australia I generally only dated girls as opposed to picking them up in clubs i'm limited in my comparison.

I think my intial wording was a little misleading, it was ofcourse said with the pashion and masculine fevor so inclined for OOT.

OH and Asian girls (real ones born in asia, i've [censored] ABCs in the ass) never ever ever let you PIIHB, they think it's for faggots.

craig r
12-06-2005, 09:10 AM
Fair enough. I know nothing of that culture. I still can't imagine a girl getting naked in my bed (or hers) and it not be pretty much implied that we were going to have sex (or at least fool around pretty heavily). I can't remember having to coax a girl into doing it when her clothes were already off. And I definitely don't have any times where they said "no" or started acting prudish in anyway in a situation like that.

craig

p.s. You also have to understand that I have usually paid good money by that point and my hour is usually up, so it would be weird for them to say "no". /images/graemlins/smile.gif (a dumb joke to show there are no hard feelings).

craig

InchoateHand
12-06-2005, 10:30 AM
Asia a big place. I'm really curious what a "traditional Asian" family looks like, and where I might find these "traditional Asian values"...

imitation
12-06-2005, 10:33 AM
This is very true inchoate, I must emphasise this is only one very small part of multiple asian cultures i've experience or been recounted that seems to ring true. Apart from that they are all VERY VERY different in most respects.

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 10:39 AM
Asia is a big place but the culture is similar.

"Traditional Family"

Mom+Father=Daughter=No Sex before Marriage=Listens to Parents=Stays at home until she is married.

From what Ive read, this is pretty common. If you can provide anything that disputes this that would be interesting.

ChipWrecked
12-06-2005, 10:51 AM
A longtime bro was in the Navy back when Subic Bay naval base was still open. He told me about the huge cultural difference between the 'traditional' village Filipinos and those around the base (whores trying to make a living). While lots of Americans loved the PI and went native, he got to where he didn't even leave the ship there.

InchoateHand
12-06-2005, 12:03 PM
""Traditional Family"

Mom+Father=Daughter=No Sex before Marriage=Listens to Parents=Stays at home until she is married."


Thats a specific element of a really, really vague term. And yes, I could provide you with a host of data that would dispute that--anthropological data collected across the archipelago, primarily, as my interests in "Asia" are focused in SEA and rarely enroach on the mainland.

I just think its odd that someone would claim one value system or one culture that somehow applies to the MULTIPLE cultures and ethnicities living within the territorial boundaries of contemporary Uzbekistan, Burma/Myanmar and say, Indonesia.

I'm really, really curious how the "culture" is similar. The many years I have spent living in "Asia" would suggest anything but.

Lazymeatball
12-06-2005, 12:20 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Most boys are raped by straight men,

[/ QUOTE ]
Men who rape boys are not straight. Do you mean men who normally sleep with women but occasionally rape boys? Because there is nothing straight about that.

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 01:01 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Most boys are raped by straight men,

[/ QUOTE ]
Men who rape boys are not straight. Do you mean men who normally sleep with women but occasionally rape boys? Because there is nothing straight about that.

[/ QUOTE ]

I dont think you understand rape.

KaneKungFu123
12-06-2005, 01:05 PM
Come on, this is OOT. No one is thinking/speaking about Indonesia or Uzbekistan when they say Asia. They are talking about japan, china, korea, etc.

yeah, you are correct there are 100 million tribes and different peoples and cultures in asia.

Boris
12-06-2005, 01:09 PM
I've conquered Japan. It was pretty easy. She was kinda drunk at a party. I think the issue is he's dating a prude and not that she's Japanese.

imitation
12-06-2005, 01:46 PM
There's something like 60+ ethnicities in China alone, and southern mind is sooo different to north mind it's uncanny. But this girl thing is pretty true throughout.