1st date: her neighborhood or yours?

[kenberman]

I met this girl Saturday night at a party; things went well and she gave me her #. So, I'll gonna take her our this weekend, but need some strategic advice.

should I go to a restaurant in her neighborhood, or mine? we only live 2 miles from one another. my neighborhood is pretty cool, w/ a few good date restaurants, plus bars we can go to afterwards if things go well.

her neighborhood is more industrial, w/ basically 1 good restuarant/bar to go. if dinner goes well there, there wouldn't really be a good place to go afterwards. except her place of course.

normally, I think it's better to take a girl out in her neighborhood, b/c you should up at her door, leave her in her comfort zone, etc. But I think this may be a case where I suggest a place on my home turf.

opinions?

[Shajen]

go where you know.

Unless you're on foot, I don't really see the problem with going to either since they're so close together. If you're going to pick her up, you may want to go to the place closer to her...but if you're meeting up somewhere, doesn't seem to matter. Things should go well if you hit it off wherever you go.

Go get'er Mav!

ScottieK

[kenberman]

[ QUOTE ]
go where you know.

[/ QUOTE ]

I actually work in her neighborhood, so I know them both pretty well.

[Aloysius]

Which city? Picking her up by car, or just taking the train to her place? If the latter, I'd do her neighborhood as it's annoying to go back to your neigborhood after "picking her up".

If car - your neighborhood is much better, as the "post-dinner" options are much greater. Also you get to be in control of the date and make all the desination decisions. Women like guys who can take control and know their [censored]. Good luck!

-Al

[Autocratic]

Take her where she is out of her element and uncomfortable. It forces her to latch on to whatever is even slightly familiar (i.e. you). When she's at her most vulnerable, start taking off her pants.

[kenberman]

[ QUOTE ]
OP- Which city?

[/ QUOTE ]

Cambridge/Somerville (Boston, basically).

[ QUOTE ]
Picking her up by car or just taking the train to meet her at her place?

[/ QUOTE ]

by 'picking her up', I basically mean driving to her neighborhood, knocking on her door, and walking to the restaurant together.

[ QUOTE ]
If the latter, I'd do her neighborhood as it's annoying to go back to your neigborhood after "picking her up".

[/ QUOTE ]

yep. but, I think it's annoying regardless of if I take the train, or drive.

[ QUOTE ]
Women like guys who can take control and know their [censored].

[/ QUOTE ]

agreed. this would be my main reason for suggesting my hood.

[slickpoppa]

[ QUOTE ]
Take her where she is out of her element and uncomfortable. It forces her to latch on to whatever is even slightly familiar (i.e. you). When she's at her most vulnerable, start taking off her pants.

[/ QUOTE ]

lol

[jba]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
OP- Which city?

[/ QUOTE ]

Cambridge/Somerville (Boston, basically).

[/ QUOTE ]


what neighborhoods

one is bound to be cooler than the other.

[OtisTheMarsupial]

Whenever possible, make the first few dates more about her than about you. So, if that means her neighborhood, sure. Just don't show up at her place to pick her up without a plan.

[Hornacek]

What restaurants are you thinking of? I just moved from Boston to NYC this summer after 5 years in Boston (4 in Back Bay and one in Medford).

If you have a car, I don't understand why this should be a big issue. Aren't there plenty of good restaurants in Somerville? Which one are you thinking of?

[kenberman]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
OP- Which city?

[/ QUOTE ]

Cambridge/Somerville (Boston, basically).

[/ QUOTE ]


what neighborhoods

one is bound to be cooler than the other.

[/ QUOTE ]

Inman Square vs Alewife, which isn't really a neighborhood at all

[kenberman]

[ QUOTE ]
What restaurants are you thinking of? I just moved from Boston to NYC this summer after 5 years in Boston (4 in Back Bay and one in Medford).

If you have a car, I don't understand why this should be a big issue. Aren't there plenty of good restaurants in Somerville? Which one are you thinking of?

[/ QUOTE ]

in Inman Square, my choices would be East Coast Grill (seafood, raw bar) or Dali (tapas). there are a couple drinks options, like the Druid or Thirty Scholar.

In Alewife, the only real option is Summer Shack.

[DMBFan23]

I usually pick neutral ground for the first date

Call me a cynic, but it doesn't matter. You'll meet at the restaurant or maybe some bar. You'll have a few drinks, have a nice meal. You'll have a great time. Everything will click and you'll think she's perfect. You may or may not have great sex. If not, you will on the next date. But after a couple of months, she'll pull a Bruce Lee. She'll rip your heart out of your chest, eat it in front of you and leave you bleeding to death in the middle of the floor.

[Aloysius]

Resident Cynic - what about OP's post indicates this may happen? Being blindly cynical = not cynical, just pessimistic / doomsayer / negative.

Gimmick accounts should do a better job of picking their spots!

Trusting You Will Choose More Wisely In The Future,
-Al

[jba]

go with inman sq. east coast and Dali's are both terrific. I wouldn't even consider taking a date to fresh pond my friend, I'd at least go to arlington or newton or something.

[ QUOTE ]
Resident Cynic - what about OP's post indicates this may happen?

[/ QUOTE ]

Nothing. Just pointing out the obvious I suppose.

[Hornacek]

What's wrong with taking her to Lexington or Allston or even downtown? None are that far away from Alewife...

People live in Alewife? teehehehehe

[Ed Miller]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
OP- Which city?

[/ QUOTE ]

Cambridge/Somerville (Boston, basically).

[/ QUOTE ]


what neighborhoods

one is bound to be cooler than the other.

[/ QUOTE ]

Inman Square vs Alewife, which isn't really a neighborhood at all

[/ QUOTE ]

I say take her to Back Bay. Dunno if Boston isn't an option for some reason, but it's neutral and fun.

[WackityWhiz]

[ QUOTE ]
Call me a cynic, but it doesn't matter. You'll meet at the restaurant or maybe some bar. You'll have a few drinks, have a nice meal. You'll have a great time. Everything will click and you'll think she's perfect. You may or may not have great sex. If not, you will on the next date. But after a couple of months, she'll pull a Bruce Lee. She'll rip your heart out of your chest, eat it in front of you and leave you bleeding to death in the middle of the floor.

[/ QUOTE ]

I thought it was funny

[jaydub]

zod,

1. Don't do dinner for a first date.
2. Don't do a fri / sat night for a first date.
3. Get a drink at a bar / coffee shop / whatever in a trendy, cool neighborhood.
4. Don't pick her up, have her meet you there.

J

[bad beetz]

And I'm quoting....

"The P ussy's good, especially when it's from a whole 'notha neighborhood."

[sam h]

[ QUOTE ]
Dali (tapas)

[/ QUOTE ]

then

[ QUOTE ]
Druid

[/ QUOTE ]

then your place.

[BoogerFace]

[ QUOTE ]
I wouldn't even consider taking a date to fresh pond

[/ QUOTE ]

Alewife is teh suck. Just about anywhere else in Cambridge would be 1000 times better.

[Aloysius]

WWhiz - yeah, I'm being a little nitpicky. When are you posting your next face the jury pics?

Looking Forward To Hot Girl Pics #3 From Whiz,
-Al

[craig r]

What is the roommate situation for each of you?

craig

[kenberman]

[ QUOTE ]
zod,

1. Don't do dinner for a first date.
2. Don't do a fri / sat night for a first date.
3. Get a drink at a bar / coffee shop / whatever in a trendy, cool neighborhood.
4. Don't pick her up, have her meet you there.

J

[/ QUOTE ]

hmm, I kind of agree, but:

since we hung out for about 2 hours at the party Saturday night, I think the pressure is off a bit for the "first date".

having a drink on a Thursday or whatever is an ok plan, but I think often time girls enjoy somebody picking them up, picking out a place to go to dinner, etc. it's kind of old fashioned, but still works.

I don't agree with the 'meet somewhere' plan. I think it shows a lot more care/thought if you pick her up, or go see her.

[kenberman]

[ QUOTE ]
What is the roommate situation for each of you?

craig

[/ QUOTE ]

good question. I currently have 2 roomates, in a big apt. - not an ideal "bring her back" situation, but not bad either.

unsure of her status.

[kenberman]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
OP- Which city?

[/ QUOTE ]

Cambridge/Somerville (Boston, basically).

[/ QUOTE ]


what neighborhoods

one is bound to be cooler than the other.

[/ QUOTE ]

Inman Square vs Alewife, which isn't really a neighborhood at all

[/ QUOTE ]

I say take her to Back Bay. Dunno if Boston isn't an option for some reason, but it's neutral and fun.

[/ QUOTE ]

Back Bay is a good option. the only negative is logistics. driving/valeting is kind of a pain, and taking the T on a first date is kind of ghetto I think. a cab is an option, I guess.

basically, I think I want to avoid driving or public transportation. I don't drink and drive (if I'm over the legal Blood Alcohol Level, I won't drive) but I want drinks to be part of the evenings itinerary.

[jaydub]

Zod,

I do not understand your pressure comment. Why would there be pressure? Pressure on whom?

Showing care / thought is not what is important at this stage. Additionally, many women are more comfortable with the meet somewhere situation. But it's not a huge deal either way.

Dinner is a mistake, do something fun that doesn't involve you buying her [censored] for spending time with you.

Good luck
J

[craig r]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
What is the roommate situation for each of you?

craig

[/ QUOTE ]

good question. I currently have 2 roomates - not an ideal "bring her back" situation, but not bad either.

unsure of her status.

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, I had 3 when I lived in Boston and I always found it easier to go back to my place. But, we each had seperate rooms and all 3 were cool. So, we could all chat for a few minutes and then my date and I could go to my room. Somehow there was always a segway to that. That is another reason for non friday or saturday dates. Roommates will go to bed earlier for work/school and then you don't have to deal with them. So you could go back to either place, have a drink/talk in the shared areas of the house and not just try to make an ackward dash to the bedroom. Plus, with roommates asleep/out of the way you can makeout first on the couch. Of course, I really don't know your intentions. But, with me, either it happened on the first night or not at all. And this isn't because i was a scumbag who would only date girls who give it up on the first night. I just think that either the attraction is there or it is not.

craig

[Hornacek]

[ QUOTE ]
Somehow there was always a segway to that. craig

[/ QUOTE ]

I think its spelled "segue".

But anyways, if you don't want to drive, then I'd suggest Cambridge. Alewife is meh. Plenty of good places in Cambridge.

[craig r]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Somehow there was always a segway to that. craig

[/ QUOTE ]

I think its spelled "segue".

But anyways, if you don't want to drive, then I'd suggest Cambridge. Alewife is meh. Plenty of good places in Cambridge.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, I think you are right. I think I was thinking of that stupid scooter thing.

craig