Zeno
07-07-2003, 02:52 AM
Delusional aspirations are good for the soul, but since I do not believe in the existence of a soul (a pox on Pythagoras and his ilk); I must submit to elementary egoism for the following statements. I plan to write an Autobiography. In fact, it is already in the antediluvian stages as a cloudy memory in my overblown head. To promote the release of this tome that is sure to rival that Potter book, I have a few things to gasp out to the throbbing masses.
First, substance is meaningless in America; therefore, a fake image, puffery, shameless promotional activities, and advanced blubbery will be pumped into the media pipeline before the book is released.
Second, in keeping within the spirit of my first item, the title of my Autobiography is –
The Gospel of Zeno: My Life as a Smart Ass.
Third, the front cover will be a close-up photograph of ME - in austere black and white for that serious and pretentious portrait that is sure to stir controversy and inflame book reviewers, especially the pedantic mob of human vermin that infest that rag called “The New York Review of Books”.
And, in keeping with book release tradition, here are a few comments that will be tacked on the back cover and billed as the usual “Advanced Praise” blurbs.
Zeno is a genius!
-eLORY
I found nothing in the book about WMD or blind structures.
-Clarkmeister
I found nothing in the book about chess or baseball.
-Dynasty
Exquisitely elegant; I was deeply moved and also …ah, excuse me; I have to go to the bathroom.
-Andy Fox
Zeno is cute (for an old man)
-Pokerbabe
High quality gibberish.
-Tommy Angelo
Utter drivel, and it does not depend.
-D. Sklansky
My book was gooder
-M. Malmuth
This book is useful for target practice but bad as fish bait.
-Ray Zee
Where’s the billiard part?
-Jimbo
Will the movie be better?
-J. Cole
Yes it will.
-M. Hiede
Zeno is part of the axis of evil; he’s next on the list.
-MMMM
I would sue if the moron had money (I liked the gun part).
-HDPM
Dog Vomit.
-Zeno of Elea
Bee Pollen.
-Zeno of Citium
Pay no attention to those last two guys; they are dead.
-Zeno of America (soon to be rich, famous and, in keeping with the American tradition of what goes with the these two adjectives, – an idiot).
First, substance is meaningless in America; therefore, a fake image, puffery, shameless promotional activities, and advanced blubbery will be pumped into the media pipeline before the book is released.
Second, in keeping within the spirit of my first item, the title of my Autobiography is –
The Gospel of Zeno: My Life as a Smart Ass.
Third, the front cover will be a close-up photograph of ME - in austere black and white for that serious and pretentious portrait that is sure to stir controversy and inflame book reviewers, especially the pedantic mob of human vermin that infest that rag called “The New York Review of Books”.
And, in keeping with book release tradition, here are a few comments that will be tacked on the back cover and billed as the usual “Advanced Praise” blurbs.
Zeno is a genius!
-eLORY
I found nothing in the book about WMD or blind structures.
-Clarkmeister
I found nothing in the book about chess or baseball.
-Dynasty
Exquisitely elegant; I was deeply moved and also …ah, excuse me; I have to go to the bathroom.
-Andy Fox
Zeno is cute (for an old man)
-Pokerbabe
High quality gibberish.
-Tommy Angelo
Utter drivel, and it does not depend.
-D. Sklansky
My book was gooder
-M. Malmuth
This book is useful for target practice but bad as fish bait.
-Ray Zee
Where’s the billiard part?
-Jimbo
Will the movie be better?
-J. Cole
Yes it will.
-M. Hiede
Zeno is part of the axis of evil; he’s next on the list.
-MMMM
I would sue if the moron had money (I liked the gun part).
-HDPM
Dog Vomit.
-Zeno of Elea
Bee Pollen.
-Zeno of Citium
Pay no attention to those last two guys; they are dead.
-Zeno of America (soon to be rich, famous and, in keeping with the American tradition of what goes with the these two adjectives, – an idiot).