What do I do (girlfriend's job) [Archive] - Two Plus Two Older Archives

pokerjoker

11-21-2005, 02:44 AM

So I am dating a japanese chick. We have been traveling a lot together but right now she is in Japan and I am in the US for a few months.

She just told me she is excited about a new job she got. She works in a "Kabukara". Basically she gets $20 an hour to bring drinks to business men (who pay ~$60 per hour to go there). She just wears a nice dress and it is in a public room. There are no private booths or anything like that.

She is also expected to sit next to these guys and talk to them. If a guy trys to touch her he will be thrown out.
Basically she is getting paid to have guys flirt with her.

She isin't telling her parents she works there because she thinks they would look down on her. Her friend works there and isin't telling her fiance because she is scared he would be mad. I have never been to one of these places but she says the one she works at is not dirty.

Her only other job (besides the 2 tabling the $25 party tables I taught her /images/graemlins/smile.gif) pays $7 an hour. She is pretty low on money and it is really hard to live on $7 an hour.

We are both graduating college this semster and she is coming to america in a few months.

She told me if I tell to stop working there she will, but she needs money. Her working there bothers me a bit but I don't want her to be broke either.

OOT?

Argus

11-21-2005, 02:52 AM

Culturally (particularly from the Japanese perspective) what she's doing is acceptable. As you explained, she isn't going to be intimate with these men, just making conversation. If she is going to leave you for a Japanese businessman, she doesn't need a $20/hr job to do it. Forbidding her to take this job would be immature and silly.

Alobar

11-21-2005, 02:59 AM

The fact you are stressing over this leads me to believe you are young and inexperienced (this isnt a bad thing). These 2 qualities are also the worst 2 qualites to have for someone involved in a long distance relationship.

Heres what you need to do. Dont stress out about her well paying job where she flirts with rich japaneese business men, shes not giving happy endings at a massage parlour. Next, break up with her and meet some girls you share the same geographic location with, gain some experience, learn about yourself and what you like/want out of life and a significant other. Youll be much better off in the long run.

dblgutshot

11-21-2005, 03:01 AM

If I were a wealthy businessman I would offer her large sums of cash to enjoy her company at the end of the night.

pokerjoker

11-21-2005, 03:04 AM

[ QUOTE ]
If I were a wealthy businessman I would offer her large sums of cash to enjoy her company at the end of the night.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm sure some of them will. I know nothing will come of it but it bothers me a bit that this happens. There are sometimes girls at these places that accept those offers, although her accepting isin't even factoring into my reasoning here.

Blarg

11-21-2005, 03:11 AM

Very confident, especially for a guy so far away.

11-21-2005, 06:02 AM

I've seen this movie called "Stratosphere Girl", which the premise fits that exact job description you're talking about. In this movie tho they picked foreigners such as Europeans/Americans to cater and entertain the bored japanese businessmen. japanese men have interesting tastes that border on the perverted. Not to scare you even more.

Blarg

11-21-2005, 06:58 AM

There have been plenty of tales of American girls being told they will be models and such in Japan and getting forced to become whores in places like this.

11-21-2005, 07:30 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I know nothing will come of it but it bothers me a bit that this happens. There are sometimes girls at these places that accept those offers, although her accepting isin't even factoring into my reasoning here.

[/ QUOTE ]

How would feel if one of them wanted to pay her $2000 to stand in the corner in her underwear and have cream tarts thrown at her?

How do you think she'd respond?

tonypaladino

11-21-2005, 07:32 AM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I know nothing will come of it but it bothers me a bit that this happens. There are sometimes girls at these places that accept those offers, although her accepting isin't even factoring into my reasoning here.

[/ QUOTE ]

How would feel if one of them wanted to pay her $2000 to stand in the corner in her underwear and have cream tarts thrown at her?

How do you think she'd respond?

[/ QUOTE ]

If my gf got offered 2k for that she'd better [censored] take it

diebitter

11-21-2005, 07:33 AM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I know nothing will come of it but it bothers me a bit that this happens. There are sometimes girls at these places that accept those offers, although her accepting isin't even factoring into my reasoning here.

[/ QUOTE ]

How would feel if one of them wanted to pay her $2000 to stand in the corner in her underwear and have cream tarts thrown at her?

How do you think she'd respond?

[/ QUOTE ]

If my gf got offered 2k for that she'd better [censored] take it

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd be going to the shop to get the tarts for him.

Blarg

11-21-2005, 07:35 AM

I'd be the tarts.

peachy

11-21-2005, 07:42 AM

i wouldnt have a problem with her working there...just be secure about urself...if she leaves u she leaves u and at least u found out early! But if u dont take things away from her (a good paying job) and u support her she will love u for it. Now her friend on the other hand should NOT be getting married and if i found out my fiance EVER lied about where he worked he would be kicked to the curb with a quickness and locked out...unbelieveable. So at least ur girl was honest with u...she enjoys the money...shes not doing anything bad...and she seems to care about u. So realize this, be supportive, suck it up and things will be fine

Punker

11-21-2005, 08:40 AM

I'll chip in $100 towards getting Tony's girlfriend to do this, if a video is posted.

tonypaladino

11-21-2005, 08:49 AM

Eh, I don't really have a girlfriend right now. I've been seeing a girl for a couple of weeks, but it's too soon to ask her to stand in a corner and have cream tarts thrown. Maybe in a month or so I'll bring it up.

11-21-2005, 09:08 AM

Oh yeah I forgot to mention the guy was masturbating while doing this.

The girl I knew was working as a club hostess in Japan (probably something similar to pj's gf), and I think occassionally going to bed with these guys though I didn't ask. This guy was married and didn't want sex, just to throw cream tarts at her while he jerked off. [censored] hilarious.

Argus

11-21-2005, 02:38 PM

I can probably convince my girlfriend to do this for two grand. Why cream tarts?

arod15

11-21-2005, 02:48 PM

Make her quit, no way i let this go by. Grind out more hours and send her money...

Patrick del Poker Grande

11-21-2005, 03:35 PM

Can't you find a corner for her to work in America?

pokerdirty

11-21-2005, 04:08 PM

tell her that strip clubs pay more.

Freakin

11-21-2005, 04:19 PM

How long have you guys been dating?

Obviously a club looking to hire girls that will be flirting will tell the girls that they're an upstanding club that will kick men out for manhandling their womem, but that doesn't mean it's true... It's not really that big of a deal, since you don't imply that you can/will give her money (which is probably what she was fishing for when she brought this up with you).

If you can't afford her, you can't complain about this job.

It's only for a few months anyways...

Dominic

11-21-2005, 05:41 PM

trust her don't. No other choice.

krimson

11-21-2005, 05:48 PM

This sounds basically like a Japanese version of Hooters.

pokerjoker

11-21-2005, 06:18 PM

[ QUOTE ]
How long have you guys been dating?

Obviously a club looking to hire girls that will be flirting will tell the girls that they're an upstanding club that will kick men out for manhandling their womem, but that doesn't mean it's true... It's not really that big of a deal, since you don't imply that you can/will give her money (which is probably what she was fishing for when she brought this up with you).

If you can't afford her, you can't complain about this job.

It's only for a few months anyways...

[/ QUOTE ]

dating for a bit over 1 year, known her for 1.5 years. Her friend has been working there for awhile and said it is OK, and hasn't been grabed or anything like that.

Freakin

11-21-2005, 06:19 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How long have you guys been dating?

Obviously a club looking to hire girls that will be flirting will tell the girls that they're an upstanding club that will kick men out for manhandling their womem, but that doesn't mean it's true... It's not really that big of a deal, since you don't imply that you can/will give her money (which is probably what she was fishing for when she brought this up with you).

If you can't afford her, you can't complain about this job.

It's only for a few months anyways...

[/ QUOTE ]

dating for a bit over 1 year, known her for 1.5 years. Her friend has been working there for awhile and said it is OK, and hasn't been grabed or anything like that.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think if you have someone else recommending the job, than it can't be too bad. Let her try it out... she should know pretty quick if it's an environment she wants to be in.

pokerjoker

11-21-2005, 06:20 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Can't you find a corner for her to work in America?

[/ QUOTE ]

its weird how the annonymous internet brings out the troll in people.

pokerjoker

11-21-2005, 06:22 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Very confident, especially for a guy so far away.

[/ QUOTE ]

I mean if she is going to have sex with someone else, its going to happen, whether she has this job or not. I have put my trust in her several times before in various ways and she has never let me down. If I thought she was cheating this job wouldn't even concern me, since I'd probably be with someone else

pokerjoker

11-21-2005, 06:25 PM

[ QUOTE ]
This sounds basically like a Japanese version of Hooters.

[/ QUOTE ]

Different in that she isin't dressed like a [censored].
Different in that she sits next to the guys and talks to them.

1 good, 1 debatabably bad.

pokerjoker

11-21-2005, 06:26 PM

[ QUOTE ]
trust her don't. No other choice.

[/ QUOTE ]

If I don't trust her I would breakup with her. I don't see any reason not to trust her though.

4thstreetpete

11-21-2005, 09:09 PM

Er, these wealthy businessmen aren't really paying $60 an hour to go and have drinks, think about it. They can easily do these at bars. Although I've never been to a Kabukara bar a wealthy friend of mine (he belongs in a triad) has told me there are considerable flirting and 'touching' going on despite what anyone tells you. There's a reason why she may not want to discuss this with her parents.

Tough call here. I think it's great that she is being honest with you and I think you should trust her. If you cannot support her financially then I don't think it's fair to tell her what to do. Even if you can totally trust her and she promises that nothing will go on, it still means that she'll find herself in compromising positions everyday.
Trust me, she will be propositioned because wealthy people are dicks.

If it was me I probably wouldn't want her to do it, not because I can't trust her but because I don't want her to be in compromising positions daily. This is not your standard american bar where you know you will be hit on if you're waitressing, here you're expected to flirt with your clientelle.
I would try to find a way where I could support her financially if I could.

cpitt398

11-21-2005, 09:20 PM

I watched a documentry on these types of bars. Basically the two girls they were following were from Canada and were going over there bc of all the money they could make. I forgot the exact numers but I believe it was a lot more than $20 an hour.

This documentry made no reference to prostitution, which I was continually waiting for, but something still seemed fishy to me. Maybe these checks were whoring it out and your girlfriend is choosing not to, therefore only making $20 an hour.

1800GAMBLER

11-21-2005, 10:13 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How long have you guys been dating?

Obviously a club looking to hire girls that will be flirting will tell the girls that they're an upstanding club that will kick men out for manhandling their womem, but that doesn't mean it's true... It's not really that big of a deal, since you don't imply that you can/will give her money (which is probably what she was fishing for when she brought this up with you).

If you can't afford her, you can't complain about this job.

It's only for a few months anyways...

[/ QUOTE ]

dating for a bit over 1 year, known her for 1.5 years. Her friend has been working there for awhile and said it is OK, and hasn't been grabed or anything like that.

[/ QUOTE ]

Is this the friend who also wont tell the guy she is going to marry that she works there? ....

FWIW, i agree with everything pete said. You _will_ worry about the situations she will be in once her job starts.

Man, teach her how to bonuswhore (i nicely avoided an easy pun for you there). I think you meantioned this job is for 1 month. So $2.4k from the job. Ya, very possible from casino whoring. You owe me a beer for making it so your girlfriend doesn't have to take this job.