View Full Version : Waitresses....could this work?
CourtesyFlush
11-02-2005, 09:57 PM
I have no idea why I was thinking about waitress "pickup schemes" but what about this:
Let's say you meet a buddy at a sports bar and your waitress is incredibly hot (as they often are). Later on in the night after a couple pitchers (when you start nursing your beers a bit more and don't need the waitress every 5 mins) you have your friend pretend to be a jerk to the waitress when she comes back... "Wow did you forget about our table or something?". You defend her with something along the lines of "Give it a rest man, she's doing fine" and apologize to her.
At the end of the night, you go up with her to pay...tip her well, apologize on behalf of your friend again and ask if she wants to join you for coffee.
So is this retarded or could it work?
MarkSummers
11-02-2005, 09:58 PM
i like this a lot.
jester710
11-02-2005, 09:59 PM
This is retarded and it can work.
NLSoldier
11-02-2005, 10:04 PM
[ QUOTE ]
dooooooo it
[/ QUOTE ]
Dynasty
11-02-2005, 10:05 PM
I figure OOT will decided that a chick would like the guy who treats her like trash.
tonypaladino
11-02-2005, 10:05 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
dooooooo it
[/ QUOTE ]
[/ QUOTE ]
hobbsmann
11-02-2005, 10:13 PM
bigscore that asian chick in your avatar is super hot.
Klepton
11-02-2005, 10:16 PM
i was looking for an image of starsky making the "do it" face, but failed.
sorry.
TheMainEvent
11-02-2005, 10:21 PM
This is pretty good. But keep in mind that her very first impression of you is going to be that you hang out with total assholes.
Arnfinn Madsen
11-02-2005, 10:23 PM
It is smart, depending on her taste she will choose one of them. The [censored] will have a tough time keeping her satisfied though /images/graemlins/smirk.gif.
lu_hawk
11-02-2005, 10:34 PM
No, you should have your friend grab her ass or touch her boob. Then you lay him out with a hook.
the night in shining armor thing wont work, she'll just think all of you are jerks
This will come across as a premeditated scheme.
bugstud
11-02-2005, 10:42 PM
[ QUOTE ]
This will come across as a premeditated scheme.
[/ QUOTE ]
clearly need to work 2 tables on this one
Isn't this how the movie "Enough" started out?
gorie
11-02-2005, 10:53 PM
is your friend hot ? i kind of want to hump him.
tonypaladino
11-02-2005, 11:07 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
This will come across as a premeditated scheme.
[/ QUOTE ]
clearly need to work 2 tables on this one
[/ QUOTE ]
Arrive seperatly, sit bar, and act like you don't know each other. When he starts giving her [censored], be all like "Who the hell do you think you are buddy..."
AnyTwoCanLose
11-02-2005, 11:15 PM
Why not say, "Hello, how are you?"
Girls in Sports bars get hit on all the time.
Positioning yourself as a guy trying to pick her up with a buddy that's a jerk doesn't really put you in a better position than just being a drunk guy trying to pick her up.
HopeydaFish
11-02-2005, 11:15 PM
This won't work. The waitress will associate your friend's jerkiness with you, no matter what you do to prove otherwise.
Your friends are a reflection on you.
The two table thing that other people have mentioned might work...but only if you want to bone her and never see her again. If you actually liked the girl and wanted to date her, it would only be a matter of time before she realized that the "jerk that you told off that night" is a friend of yours.
CourtesyFlush
11-02-2005, 11:29 PM
[ QUOTE ]
This will come across as a premeditated scheme.
[/ QUOTE ]
This was a concern, I wasn't sure if the "good cop, bad cop" play would be completely transparent.
CourtesyFlush
11-02-2005, 11:31 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Isn't this how the movie "Enough" started out?
[/ QUOTE ]
I haven't seen it...did it work? /images/graemlins/smile.gif
CourtesyFlush
11-02-2005, 11:33 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
This will come across as a premeditated scheme.
[/ QUOTE ]
clearly need to work 2 tables on this one
[/ QUOTE ]
Arrive seperatly, sit bar, and act like you don't know each other. When he starts giving her [censored], be all like "Who the hell do you think you are buddy..."
[/ QUOTE ]
Yeah, but that is a whole lot of trouble to go through just to ask a girl out. If she says no, you and your friend just went to a bar and sat alone all night for nothing.
housenuts
11-02-2005, 11:50 PM
wow..."it's so stupid it just might work" that's my favourite cliche
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Isn't this how the movie "Enough" started out?
[/ QUOTE ]
I haven't seen it...did it work? /images/graemlins/smile.gif
[/ QUOTE ]
Yes, but I'm not sure if this is what they did to get her or not.
Edit: But, she did end killing him by the end of the movie, though... /images/graemlins/smirk.gif
siccjay
11-02-2005, 11:58 PM
Uhm, No.
Jokingly be the one that says "Did you forget about our table or something?" Don't be mean about it.
gorie
11-03-2005, 12:02 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Uhm, No.
Jokingly be the one that says "Did you forget about our table or something?" Don't be mean about it.
[/ QUOTE ]
that's what i was thinking.
or at least if you insist on acting out a skit, have 2 friends with. 1 guy be the jerk, 1 guy be the annoying hero, and you be the normal one.
Clarkmeister
11-03-2005, 12:08 AM
[ QUOTE ]
is your friend hot ? i kind of want to hump him.
[/ QUOTE ]
Good posting.
Ulysses
11-03-2005, 01:41 AM
If she is a high self-esteem chick, you have no chance since she will think you guys are assholes.
If she is a low self-esteem chick, you have no chance since the only guy who might get banged is your friend.
diebitter
11-03-2005, 01:53 AM
http://www.happyhunter.com/a.jpg
gamblore99
11-03-2005, 02:03 AM
put your thumb in her ass when you are paying the bill and in a deep voice say "youz a dirty girl"
mason55
11-03-2005, 02:11 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Uhm, No.
Jokingly be the one that says "Did you forget about our table or something?" Don't be mean about it.
[/ QUOTE ]
Definitely the way to do it. I love doing this to waitresses and it always works. Example from tonight:
I flag down the waitress as she walks by
"Can I order some food please?"
"Yeah, can you give me a second?"
"No, I'm really hungry right now!"
Then a big smile and a laugh and (this is key) a light touch on the shoulder.
Ended up getting her number.
CourtesyFlush
11-03-2005, 02:23 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Uhm, No.
Jokingly be the one that says "Did you forget about our table or something?" Don't be mean about it.
[/ QUOTE ]
I see your point. You could definitely end up looking like the annoying "taking everything way too seriously" guy if it sounded like your friend was joking when he said it. Even if he didn't, she may assume that he was and you look like an idiot again. Probably much better to be the guy friendly teasing her then the nerdy hero guy. You and gorie are wise.
bdk3clash
11-03-2005, 02:24 AM
Wow--the good cop/bad cop routine? How novel!
RustedCorpse
11-03-2005, 02:43 AM
I say two table it, and if for some reason you ever start dating seriously, you reveal the scheme for what it was and introduce her to the friend, then it'll be cute.
Being at the same table NEVER works in my experience, and I've had a lot of non rehearsed practice.
mason55
11-03-2005, 02:47 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I say two table it, and if for some reason you ever start dating seriously, you reveal the scheme for what it was and introduce her to the friend, then it'll be cute.
Being at the same table NEVER works in my experience, and I've had a lot of non rehearsed practice.
[/ QUOTE ]
First you guys have to place a bet on who she goes with to prom. Then when she finds out, of course she'll get pissed, but you'll convince her you really love her. In the end, like RustedCorpse said, it will all work out.
TheBlueMonster
11-03-2005, 03:42 AM
[ QUOTE ]
If she is a high self-esteem chick, you have no chance since she will think you guys are assholes.
If she is a low self-esteem chick, you have no chance since the only guy who might get banged is your friend.
[/ QUOTE ]
the scientific explanation
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
If she is a high self-esteem chick, you have no chance since she will think you guys are assholes.
If she is a low self-esteem chick, you have no chance since the only guy who might get banged is your friend.
[/ QUOTE ]
the scientific explanation
[/ QUOTE ]
Game theory suggests that with an unknown target, in order maximize gains both you and your friend should each act 50% ass-hole.
MyTurn2Raise
11-03-2005, 05:01 AM
damn...some of you guys are hopeless. It does not take elaborate schemes to get women. They are people just like you. Most are looking (dying for?) the right man in their life. You're not trying to sell a treadmill to a quadropalegic. You should be offering the girl in question what she wants without even thinking about it.
On to this instance...waitresses get hit on all the time. They've seen schemes like this many times. It's a waste of your mental energy to go with this. Just talk to the damn girl. As an intelligent poster noted earlier, your friends reflect upon you. No woman wants the king of dorks. She wants the hero. Be a f'ing hero man.
I dont think your "this is not an elaborate scheme"-scheme will work
jdl22
11-03-2005, 05:09 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
If she is a high self-esteem chick, you have no chance since she will think you guys are assholes.
If she is a low self-esteem chick, you have no chance since the only guy who might get banged is your friend.
[/ QUOTE ]
the scientific explanation
[/ QUOTE ]
Game theory suggests that with an unknown target, in order maximize gains both you and your friend should each act 50% ass-hole.
[/ QUOTE ]
That's probability matching. GT would suggest it doesn't matter whether you act like an [censored] or nice guy.
why wouldnt it matter. By doing that, you both combined have the greatest chance to score if you dont know her self esteem level
jdl22
11-03-2005, 05:51 AM
I'm not sure about the original assumptions but if she likes assholes 1/2 the time and likes nice guys the other 1/2 (or if half the girls like nice guys and the other half like assholes) then it doesn't matter which you go with you have a 50% shot. If you flip a coin and decide that doesn't affect anything since you have a 50/50 shot either way the coin lands. You could mix 90% nice guy and 10% [censored] if you like.
If she is more likely to like either assholes or nice guys then you would want to always play which ever role she is more likely to prefer.
If we're working as a team then we should simply have one of us be the [censored] and other the nice guy. Again, if she is as likely to prefer either then it doesn't matter who plays which role. This would certainly work out for one of us. Otherwise if both act like assholes and she happens to prefer nice guys neither of us are getting any. Even if she does prefer jerks we would each only have a 50/50 chance of pounding it like a hammer. If we're both mixing 50/50 then half the time we're both playing the same role which is worse for both of us.
diebitter
11-03-2005, 06:55 AM
[ QUOTE ]
is your friend hot ? i kind of want to hump him.
[/ QUOTE ]
Can't we turn this into one of the challenges?
[ QUOTE ]
No, you should have your friend grab her ass and touch her boob. Then you lay him out with a hook.
[/ QUOTE ]
but really. does anyone actually concoct schemes like this? talk to her. if it doesn't go well, move on to the next waitress. practice makes perfect.
jakethebake
11-03-2005, 08:58 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
No, you should have your friend grab her ass and touch her boob. Then you lay him out with a hook.
[/ QUOTE ]
but really. does anyone actually concoct schemes like this? talk to her. if it doesn't go well, move on to the next waitress. practice makes perfect.
[/ QUOTE ]
I've had friends that do asinine [censored] like this, and have tried to get me involved in it. This is sheer idiocy. I hate games. Talk to her. Flirt a little. If she likes you, she'll probably have coffee with you. By the way, at any time were her boobs in contact with your arm?
siccjay
11-03-2005, 09:10 AM
[ QUOTE ]
It does not take elaborate schemes to get women. They are people just like you. Most are looking (dying for?) the right man in their life. You're not trying to sell a treadmill to a quadropalegic.
[/ QUOTE ]
This is gold, people.
Sheepscot
11-03-2005, 10:05 AM
[ QUOTE ]
i was looking for an image of starsky making the "do it" face, but failed.
sorry.
[/ QUOTE ] http://img136.echo.cx/img136/821/doit4cr.gif
pokerdirty
11-03-2005, 10:08 AM
elaborate scheme.
don't forget to post trip report, along with drunken pictures with your camera phone.
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Uhm, No.
Jokingly be the one that says "Did you forget about our table or something?" Don't be mean about it.
[/ QUOTE ]
that's what i was thinking.
or at least if you insist on acting out a skit, have 2 friends with. 1 guy be the jerk, 1 guy be the annoying hero, and you be the normal one.
[/ QUOTE ]
Ok, now I'm convinced you're a guy. You're too clever to be a girl.
Rduke55
11-03-2005, 11:59 AM
[ QUOTE ]
If she is a high self-esteem chick, you have no chance since she will think you guys are assholes.
If she is a low self-esteem chick, you have no chance since the only guy who might get banged is your friend.
[/ QUOTE ]
Brilliant.
OtisTheMarsupial
11-03-2005, 11:14 PM
[ QUOTE ]
If she is a high self-esteem chick, you have no chance since she will think you guys are assholes.
If she is a low self-esteem chick, you have no chance since the only guy who might get banged is your friend.
[/ QUOTE ]
Likely. Also, a lot of waitresses don't date customers. There's just something about guys who like waitresses - they like to be served. Take the girl out of the waitress uniform and put her in an office and suddenly she's not as hot.
CourtesyFlush
11-03-2005, 11:43 PM
[ QUOTE ]
damn...some of you guys are hopeless. It does not take elaborate schemes to get women. They are people just like you. Most are looking (dying for?) the right man in their life. You're not trying to sell a treadmill to a quadropalegic. You should be offering the girl in question what she wants without even thinking about it.
On to this instance...waitresses get hit on all the time. They've seen schemes like this many times. It's a waste of your mental energy to go with this. Just talk to the damn girl. As an intelligent poster noted earlier, your friends reflect upon you. No woman wants the king of dorks. She wants the hero. Be a f'ing hero man.
[/ QUOTE ]
Man, I knew someone was going to post this. "You don't need a scheme to get girls, how pathetic, blah blah blah". Get over yourself man, everyone knows the straightforward approach works. I was not claiming to need a scheme, I just thought it would be fun to talk about this one and if it could work.
Also I was hoping someone might tell a story of when they tried a good cop bad cop scheme to get a girl (Anyone?).
So yeah, settle down buddy...kudos on the treadmill comment though.
MyTurn2Raise
11-04-2005, 02:04 AM
Ok...I admit...I over-reacted. I think we can both admit that we've seen quite a few pansys posting here who don't know how to talk to women in the first place. I'm on a warpath to turn those chodes into men, so I shot first and asked questions later.
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