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View Full Version : So I'm the mascot tomorrow for homecoming...


MikeNaked
10-28-2005, 12:43 AM
Yep, I'm donning a furry horse costume tomorrow night for a packed high school stadium and I'm going to clown on people, do pushups, heckle the other team and officials, etc. I'm a teacher at this school and I'm amped. This is a childhood dream nearly fulfilled.

So what do you think of this skit my friend and I cooked up?

Pregame: I'm in my costume messing around, joking with people, hugging little kids.

My brother (hereafter known as Grandma) is dressed up as an old lady in a wheelchair, complete with iron-gray bun wig, shawl over her lap, the works.

My friend Adam will push Grandma to a VIP spot on the field behind the players, highly visible to the audience.

Halftime: Adam wheels Grandma back and he and I switch costumes. During this time, the marching band will still be playing. I wheel Grandma back out in front of the stands, back to her VIP spot on the field. She has a big tub of popcorn and a cheerleader's pompom. I stand next to her and occasionally whisper solicitously to her.

The fight song, which is very energizing, begins. Grandma starts rhythmically pumping the pompom. Adam, in the horse outfit starts going wild, moshing, getting totally into it.

Then -- the drum breakdown section of the song kicks in! People are dancing and kids are chanting! The horse half-knocks/half-pushes me down into the muddy grass and keeps going apeshit. The crowd by this point realizes I'm down and then -- THE HORSE KICKS GRANDMA OVER!

He then circles her once, then drapes our school flag over her while putting one foot on her chest triumphantly. Crowd goes wild. We stand up and take a bow.

Whatdya think? Do you have any other ideas for the mascot for the evening?

jacki
10-28-2005, 12:48 AM
I've read this 5 times and i still don't get it.

siccjay
10-28-2005, 12:52 AM
The mascot at my school got drunk for a Basketball game and proceeded to Masterbate underneath the goal everytime the opposing team shot free throws. (Well, he didn't get away with it for long.)

Go for that.

jaydub
10-28-2005, 12:56 AM
Love the thought of a grown man putting so much thought into it. Especially cause I could see myself doing the same.

With that said, I doubt this will end well but I all means go ahead.

Popinjay
10-28-2005, 01:00 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I've read this 5 times and i still don't get it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ya I think we really need a diagram here.

SoloAJ
10-28-2005, 01:04 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I've read this 5 times and i still don't get it.

[/ QUOTE ]

It makes perfect sense to me....if the team they're playing is called the Grannys.

10-28-2005, 01:05 AM
I dont get it.....is the other team's mascot the grannies?

MikeNaked
10-28-2005, 01:10 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I dont get it.....is the other team's mascot the grannies?

[/ QUOTE ]

Umm..no. The Dragons. I know this skit doesn't make much sense and ain't very PC but it will be friggin hilarious because it will create a true WTF? moment. After we take a bow, the situation defuses and everyone busts out laughing.

In theory anyways... /images/graemlins/grin.gif

MikeNaked
10-28-2005, 01:15 AM
[ QUOTE ]
The mascot at my school got drunk for a Basketball game and proceeded to Masterbate underneath the goal everytime the opposing team shot free throws. (Well, he didn't get away with it for long.)

Go for that.

[/ QUOTE ]

See? This is what I'm looking for. (I like that you capitalize Masturbate, btw)

Masturbate...check...

lapoker17
10-28-2005, 01:25 AM
I'm happy that you're excited about this. I am too.

Quite a bit of it doesn't make much sense to me, but with your desired goal of a WTF moment, I think you're on the right track.

One question: Why do you need to do the costume change at halftime?

kipin
10-28-2005, 01:46 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I've read this 5 times and i still don't get it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Try reading it drunk....