How to answer this common female question? [Archive]

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 03:07 PM

I'll save the story as to how this came up and just ask how you answer this question from a girl:

"Would you break up with me if I got fat?"

I think the problem arises for me from the fact that my honest answer is yes, for various reasons (and no I do not think this is shallow, my reasons are valid). So when I'm asked this question, I tend to not want to lie and give the girl the wrong idea. Have you guys ever had this problem?

swede123

10-19-2005, 03:08 PM

We're still together, aren't we?

jakethebake

10-19-2005, 03:08 PM

Why? Are you planning to?

imported_The Vibesman

10-19-2005, 03:11 PM

You could try giving your honest answer and the various reasons.

It amazes me how many people this doesn't occur to.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 03:11 PM

It occured to me. That's exactly what I did.

mslif

10-19-2005, 03:12 PM

It's a loose/loose situation.
If you answer yes, she will think you are shallow and that you just into her looks.
If you answer no, you are a liar and you are going to sound phony.
I think it is best just to tell her that you have never been confronted with the problem and therefore cannot give an opinion as to how you would act.

jakethebake

10-19-2005, 03:12 PM

[ QUOTE ]
You could try giving your honest answer and the various reasons.

It amazes me how many people this doesn't occur to.

[/ QUOTE ]

You want the truth? You can't handle the truth!

http://www.destinationhollywood.com/celebrities/images/jacknicholson_fewgoodmen_02.jpg

Patrick del Poker Grande

10-19-2005, 03:13 PM

"Quit asking stupid questions"

The bottom line is you never EVER answer this question. Avoid it at all costs. There is no good that can come from it.

RiverFenix

10-19-2005, 03:14 PM

Hopefully youve already instilled a negative body image into her and she wont ever get fat as shes way too self concious about her appearance.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 03:14 PM

[ QUOTE ]
It's a loose/loose situation.

[/ QUOTE ]

asofel

10-19-2005, 03:15 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"Quit asking stupid questions"

The bottom line is you never EVER answer this question. Avoid it at all costs. There is no good that can come from it.

[/ QUOTE ]

you can't avoid it if someone puts you to it directly. And if they do that, then your answer should be "i don't know, but there's probably a much better chance of me breaking up with you if you ask questions like that".

If its an honest non-trapping question then give an honest answer. Ask her as well.

"If you gained 10 pounds? No, of course not. If you gained 400? Well, if I weighed 450 would you be as attracted to me?

Cancer Merchant

10-19-2005, 03:17 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
It's a loose/loose situation.

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

If the question comes up, the clothes aren't loose.

Shajen

10-19-2005, 03:17 PM

this isn't even the root question though.

This question is designed to make her feel that you love her unconditionally, so even if she got fat, or got burned horribly, or whatever highschool [censored] she comes up with to ask you, you'll still love her.

That's what she's looking for, emotional investment.

jaydub

10-19-2005, 03:18 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"Would you break up with me if I got fat?"

[/ QUOTE ]

"No but I'd stop cheating on you if you got skinny."

Bluffoon

10-19-2005, 03:18 PM

My answer woud be that I would break up with her if she keeps asking me questions like this.

Blarg

10-19-2005, 03:18 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I'll save the story as to how this came up and just ask how you answer this question from a girl:

"Would you break up with me if I got fat?"

I think the problem arises for me from the fact that my honest answer is yes, for various reasons (and no I do not think this is shallow, my reasons are valid). So when I'm asked this question, I tend to not want to lie and give the girl the wrong idea. Have you guys ever had this problem?

[/ QUOTE ]

"Don't be silly, honey. You're already fat."

imported_The Vibesman

10-19-2005, 03:19 PM

Good. She understands you or she doesn't.

It's not uncommon for people to get irrational when they are discussing things like this. If this is the case, try to calmly and clearly point out where she is being irrational. If she continues, tell her you're not going to discuss it unless she's willing to look at all sides of the argument. If that doesn't work, tell her you don't like games and to f**k off until she wants to be an adult.

asofel

10-19-2005, 03:19 PM

[ QUOTE ]
this isn't even the root question though.

This question is designed to make her feel that you love her unconditionally, so even if she got fat, or got burned horribly, or whatever highschool [censored] she comes up with to ask you, you'll still love her.

That's what she's looking for, emotional investment.

[/ QUOTE ]

exactly, and hence the first part of my response. There's fishing and there's fishing. Asking for a cute compliment or some emotional security is fine, but putting someone in an awkward situation and trying to see if you can get them to say what you want is not, and no guy OR girl should stand for it.

imported_The Vibesman

10-19-2005, 03:20 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
"Quit asking stupid questions"

The bottom line is you never EVER answer this question. Avoid it at all costs. There is no good that can come from it.

[/ QUOTE ]

you can't avoid it if someone puts you to it directly. And if they do that, then your answer should be "i don't know, but there's probably a much better chance of me breaking up with you if you ask questions like that".

If its an honest non-trapping question then give an honest answer. Ask her as well.

"If you gained 10 pounds? No, of course not. If you gained 400? Well, if I weighed 450 would you be as attracted to me?

[/ QUOTE ]

Much better post than mine.

jakethebake

10-19-2005, 03:20 PM

[ QUOTE ]
your answer should be "i don't know, but there's probably a much better chance of me breaking up with you if you ask questions like that".

[/ QUOTE ]

I think this is correct. I really couldn't ever see my self with anyone that asked things like this to begin with.

jaydub

10-19-2005, 03:21 PM

[ QUOTE ]

....

try to calmly and clearly point out where she is being irrational.

...

tell her you're not going to discuss it unless she's willing to look at all sides of the argument.

...

If that doesn't work, tell her you don't like games

[/ QUOTE ]

Dude have you ever talked to a woman? /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Bluffoon

10-19-2005, 03:22 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"Quit asking stupid questions"

The bottom line is you never EVER answer this question. Avoid it at all costs. There is no good that can come from it.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is so very correct. Never answer these trap questions. Not even if your balls are in a vise.

2+2 wannabe

10-19-2005, 03:25 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
"Quit asking stupid questions"

The bottom line is you never EVER answer this question. Avoid it at all costs. There is no good that can come from it.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is so very correct. Never answer these trap questions. Not even if your balls are in a vise.

[/ QUOTE ]

Dominic

10-19-2005, 03:25 PM

ther answer is yes, and there's nothing wrong with saying it.

Tell her, "If you got fat, that would tell me you have no respect for either yourself, or my feelings and desires. Physical attraction is just as important as any other part of a relationship - if we no long er felt physically attracted to one another, all we would be is friends, right? And If you were to get fat, that would tell me you no longer care if I find you attractive, and that would be extremely hurtful to me. I mean, what would that say about how you felt about me?? So yes, I would break up with you if you got fat."

Something like that. Women need to KNOW how important looks are to guys.

Or, you could always reverse the question: "Would you break-up with me if I got fat?" Or, "Would you break-up with me if I lost my job, or wanted to become a video-store clerk for the rest of my life?"

There are many ways to answer this question - and be truthful.

TheMainEvent

10-19-2005, 03:26 PM

So what's the deal with your OOT column?

rohjoh

10-19-2005, 03:26 PM

I always turn it around on them. I would ask if she would leave me if I got fat.

Never works, but this is what I would do.

Patrick del Poker Grande

10-19-2005, 03:27 PM

SheetWise

10-19-2005, 03:30 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"Would you break up with me if I got fat?"

[/ QUOTE ]
How fat are we talking here?

M2d

10-19-2005, 03:34 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"Would you break up with me if I got fat?"

[/ QUOTE ]
I thought we broke up last week.

Dominic

10-19-2005, 03:34 PM

LOL....I don't know....if a Mod wants me to try it, I will...I am a professional writer, after all....

Or maybe just an "Ask Dominic" thread that's only about relationships/sex/etc.

I'm game.

HopeydaFish

10-19-2005, 03:35 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
"Would you break up with me if I got fat?"

[/ QUOTE ]

"No but I'd stop cheating on you if you got skinny."

[/ QUOTE ]

This is my favorite answer in the thread. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

peachy

10-19-2005, 03:36 PM

if i was a guy...and a girl said that to me....

id tell them to stop being so insecure...

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

diebitter

10-19-2005, 03:37 PM

"No, of course not."

You of course need to have mastered faking sincerity.

TheMainEvent

10-19-2005, 03:41 PM

[ QUOTE ]
LOL....I don't know....if a Mod wants me to try it, I will...I am a professional writer, after all....

Or maybe just an "Ask Dominic" thread that's only about relationships/sex/etc.

I'm game.

[/ QUOTE ]

You could do it in a "dear bison..." monthly type of format. I think the mods would dig it, since it would also help consolidate a lot of questions into one thread.

Miggo

10-19-2005, 03:42 PM

[ QUOTE ]
if i was a guy...and a girl said that to me....

id tell them to stop being so insecure...

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

[/ QUOTE ]

Hey!!! Wait a minute. If you asked a guy that, you'd expect them to tell you not to be so insecure. But if a guy asked you that, you'd walk out on them. You gotta elaborate a little. /images/graemlins/confused.gif

asofel

10-19-2005, 03:43 PM

HopeydaFish

10-19-2005, 03:44 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"No, of course not."

You of course need to have mastered faking sincerity.

[/ QUOTE ]

I've been with the same girl for 9 years. Believe me, I can fake sincerity with the best of them. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

peachy

10-19-2005, 03:45 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
if i was a guy...and a girl said that to me....

id tell them to stop being so insecure...

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

[/ QUOTE ]

Hey!!! Wait a minute. If you asked a guy that, you'd expect them to tell you not to be so insecure. But if a guy asked you that, you'd walk out on them. You gotta elaborate a little. /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

if the guy has no issues with his girl being insecure then thats his deal (he doesnt have to leave her)...if someone im with is insecure im out the door

i mearly pointed out it was an insecurity issue to me....me leaving them is what i would do, what they chose to do with thier psycho is thier problem

clearer?

asofel

10-19-2005, 03:47 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
if i was a guy...and a girl said that to me....

id tell them to stop being so insecure...

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

[/ QUOTE ]

Hey!!! Wait a minute. If you asked a guy that, you'd expect them to tell you not to be so insecure. But if a guy asked you that, you'd walk out on them. You gotta elaborate a little. /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

if the guy has no issues with his girl being insecure then thats his deal (he doesnt have to leave her)...if someone im with is insecure im out the door

[/ QUOTE ]

ok but i think the confusion there peachy was that you said if you were a guy, you wouldn't leave, but as a girl you would...

HopeydaFish

10-19-2005, 03:47 PM

Edge34

10-19-2005, 03:48 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
LOL....I don't know....if a Mod wants me to try it, I will...I am a professional writer, after all....

Or maybe just an "Ask Dominic" thread that's only about relationships/sex/etc.

I'm game.

[/ QUOTE ]

You could do it in a "dear bison..." monthly type of format. I think the mods would dig it, since it would also help consolidate a lot of questions into one thread.

[/ QUOTE ]

Am I the only person that finds the irony of asking OOT's resident porn industry insider about relationship advice hilarious?

That said, this would be gold.

peachy

10-19-2005, 03:48 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
if i was a guy...and a girl said that to me....

id tell them to stop being so insecure...

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

[/ QUOTE ]

Hey!!! Wait a minute. If you asked a guy that, you'd expect them to tell you not to be so insecure. But if a guy asked you that, you'd walk out on them. You gotta elaborate a little. /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

if the guy has no issues with his girl being insecure then thats his deal (he doesnt have to leave her)...if someone im with is insecure im out the door

[/ QUOTE ]

ok but i think the confusion there peachy was that you said if you were a guy, you wouldn't leave, but as a girl you would...

[/ QUOTE ]

no...im saying that me leaving is what "I" would do as a person...some people need insecure people in thier lives and thrive off of them - thus others might choose to stay even after telling thier partners "not to be insecure"

peachy

10-19-2005, 03:50 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
if i was a guy...and a girl said that to me....

id tell them to stop being so insecure...

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

[/ QUOTE ]

You're so hard-core, peachy.

[/ QUOTE ]

uuummm its called being honest and not sticking around in something i know wont work...its not worth my time and im not gonna sugar coat it

asofel

10-19-2005, 03:50 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
if i was a guy...and a girl said that to me....

id tell them to stop being so insecure...

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

[/ QUOTE ]

Hey!!! Wait a minute. If you asked a guy that, you'd expect them to tell you not to be so insecure. But if a guy asked you that, you'd walk out on them. You gotta elaborate a little. /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

if the guy has no issues with his girl being insecure then thats his deal (he doesnt have to leave her)...if someone im with is insecure im out the door

[/ QUOTE ]

ok but i think the confusion there peachy was that you said if you were a guy, you wouldn't leave, but as a girl you would...

[/ QUOTE ]

no...im saying that me leaving is what "I" would do as a person...some people need insecure people in thier lives and thrive off of them - thus others might choose to stay even after telling thier partners "not to be insecure"

[/ QUOTE ]

ok, so the "if i was a guy...i'd tell them to be stop being insecure" would end with you leaving....either way, you being a guy or girl has no effect on the outcome, right? someone asks you you're out of there?

peachy

10-19-2005, 03:52 PM

[ QUOTE ]

ok, so the "if i was a guy...i'd tell them to be stop being insecure" would end with you leaving....either way, you being a guy or girl has no affect on the outcome, right? someone asks you you're out of there?

[/ QUOTE ]

yes - wether i was a guy or girl i would do the same thing - if someone asks me a question b/c they are insecure...a DUMB question...then im done with that person.

asofel

10-19-2005, 03:53 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

ok, so the "if i was a guy...i'd tell them to be stop being insecure" would end with you leaving....either way, you being a guy or girl has no affect on the outcome, right? someone asks you you're out of there?

[/ QUOTE ]

yes - wether i was a guy or girl i would do the same thing - if someone asks me a question b/c they are insecure...a DUMB question...then im done with that person.

[/ QUOTE ]

ok cool that makes more sense

jaydub

10-19-2005, 03:56 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

ok, so the "if i was a guy...i'd tell them to be stop being insecure" would end with you leaving....either way, you being a guy or girl has no affect on the outcome, right? someone asks you you're out of there?

[/ QUOTE ]

yes - wether i was a guy or girl i would do the same thing - if someone asks me a question b/c they are insecure...a DUMB question...then im done with that person.

[/ QUOTE ]

ok cool that makes more sense

[/ QUOTE ]

No it doesn't, you're just tired of punching a wall.

diebitter

10-19-2005, 03:58 PM

I thought they were flirting.

imported_The Vibesman

10-19-2005, 03:58 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

....

try to calmly and clearly point out where she is being irrational.

...

tell her you're not going to discuss it unless she's willing to look at all sides of the argument.

...

If that doesn't work, tell her you don't like games

[/ QUOTE ]

Dude have you ever talked to a woman? /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

The Vibesgirl and I have been together for ten years, exactly because we talk to each other like this. My last few relationships were with psychos who thought they had to project a completely false personality for their boyfriends in order to be accepted. I don't go for that. I don't go for head games. When the Vibesgirl and I got together, we were both pretty wary of close relationships, as she was getting over a bad marriage, and I was getting over a terrible relationship with a completely psycho girl that I actually had to threaten with a restraining order after I found out how much she had been lying to me. (Example: This girl told me she had given birth at 14 to a daughter who had died at the age of 3, which was a total lie.) The Vibesgirl and I agreed that we would be completely honest with each other. It wasn't easy. There were a few issues we had to work out. But now we can say anything to each other, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

One of the hardest things about this method? Being honest with yourself, to yourself about yourself. It's hard to admit your faults or insecurities to someone else. It's damn near impossible when you won't acknowledge them yourself.

man

10-19-2005, 04:00 PM

I think the correct answer is to not be a shallow prick. consider also the fact that if you ever settle down with a woman for the long haul, she will become fat and unattractive. you might as well learn to deal with it. it's easier to lower your standards than get her to be beautiful, man.

jaydub

10-19-2005, 04:04 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I think the correct answer is to not be a shallow prick. consider also the fact that if you ever settle down with a woman for the long haul, she will become fat and unattractive. you might as well learn to deal with it. it's easier to lower your standards than get her to be beautiful, man.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wow is this a corollary of "try not to expect too much and you won't be disappointed"?

imported_anacardo

10-19-2005, 04:12 PM

As the bad-ass, it would seem like you'd be more suited to someone less bad-ass who complements you, rather than someone equally bad-ass with whom things are more likely to become a running contest. What do you think about this?

asofel

10-19-2005, 04:13 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

ok, so the "if i was a guy...i'd tell them to be stop being insecure" would end with you leaving....either way, you being a guy or girl has no affect on the outcome, right? someone asks you you're out of there?

[/ QUOTE ]

yes - wether i was a guy or girl i would do the same thing - if someone asks me a question b/c they are insecure...a DUMB question...then im done with that person.

[/ QUOTE ]

ok cool that makes more sense

[/ QUOTE ]

No it doesn't, you're just tired of punching a wall.

[/ QUOTE ]

lol...well said...but in the end the point did make sense...it just wasn't said clearly in the first place /images/graemlins/wink.gif

asofel

10-19-2005, 04:14 PM

haha, no, ahhve got mah own gurl /images/graemlins/grin.gif

imported_anacardo

10-19-2005, 04:18 PM

This is the worst. Just go to the gym together. Jesus.

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:21 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I think the problem arises for me from the fact that my honest answer is yes, for various reasons (and no I do not think this is shallow, my reasons are valid).

[/ QUOTE ]

Are you [censored] kidding me. How can this be anything other then shallow. THere are no reasons short of "Well I'd worry you'd get diabeties" (sorry for setting off everyones BS detectors there), that are reasonable. If you leave her because she's fat you are shallow, I understand it means she's let her self go, but it's nothing you can't work out together, as I'm sure you have problems that she's helped you with.
As for whether it's bad to be shallow, well to each their own.

Cody

jakethebake

10-19-2005, 04:25 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Are you [censored] kidding me. How can this be anything other then shallow. THere are no reasons short of "Well I'd worry you'd get diabeties" (sorry for setting off everyones BS detectors there), that are reasonable. If you leave her because she's fat you are shallow, I understand it means she's let her self go, but it's nothing you can't work out together, as I'm sure you have problems that she's helped you with.
As for whether it's bad to be shallow, well to each their own.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

It's not just that she's fat and unattractive. Part of the problem is that I think fat people are lazy. also, if she's asking this question, she's got low self-esteem, which is another common trait of fat people. FWIW, I like curvy women. Not fat, but with a little meat so i'm not talking about her being extremely skinny or snything, just not fat.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:27 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"No, of course not."

You of course need to have mastered faking sincerity.

[/ QUOTE ]
I think this is an incorrect answer. You have to remember that I said I would most definetely break up with a girl if she got fat. Not chubby, but fat. Fatness angers me. It presents a lot about the emotional content of a person. My answer is basically this:

"I am with you because we share a lot of interests. One of the central themes to our interests is activity and an optimistic outlook, which are both greatly hindered by a fat, lazy attitude."

The last thing that I would ever say in this situation is a straight "no of course not" type of answer. But that's just me. Its most definetely the easiest way around the issue.

-Jihad

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:28 PM

No man I totally agree, [censored] that fat bitch, she makes me laugh and cares about me and is incredibly intellegent, but [censored] that fat slut, lose some weight tubby.

This is all bullshit. I'm sorry Jake, you make a good point and I don't mean for this to sound like I"m going after you but the attitude of the OP just pisses me off.

Cody

highlife

10-19-2005, 04:31 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'll save the story as to how this came up and just ask how you answer this question from a girl:

"Would you break up with me if I got fat?"

I think the problem arises for me from the fact that my honest answer is yes, for various reasons (and no I do not think this is shallow, my reasons are valid). So when I'm asked this question, I tend to not want to lie and give the girl the wrong idea. Have you guys ever had this problem?

[/ QUOTE ]

"Don't be silly, honey. You're already fat."

[/ QUOTE ]

I actually said that to my last girlfriend.

Not exactly the same thing but more along the lines of "You are already out of shape and heavier than when we started dating, and I haven't left you yet." Then I rubbed her belly. That didn't go over well.

HopeydaFish

10-19-2005, 04:33 PM

[ QUOTE ]

uuummm its called being honest and not sticking around in something i know wont work...its not worth my time and im not gonna sugar coat it

[/ QUOTE ]

So you're sitting on the couch with your boyfriend, watching TV. The show you're watching is about a woman who leaves her husband because he gets fat.

Your boyfriend turns to you, and half-jokingly asked, "Yeesh, that's horrible. You wouldn't leave *me* if I got fat, would you?"

Is the relationship now over?

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:33 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Are you [censored] kidding me. How can this be anything other then shallow. THere are no reasons short of "Well I'd worry you'd get diabeties" (sorry for setting off everyones BS detectors there), that are reasonable. If you leave her because she's fat you are shallow, I understand it means she's let her self go, but it's nothing you can't work out together, as I'm sure you have problems that she's helped you with.
As for whether it's bad to be shallow, well to each their own.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

It's not just that she's fat and unattractive. Part of the problem is that I think fat people are lazy. also, if she's asking this question, she's got low self-esteem, which is another common trait of fat people. FWIW, I like curvy women. Not fat, but with a little meat so i'm not talking about her being extremely skinny or snything, just not fat.

[/ QUOTE ]

Good post Jake, its pretty much where I stand.

I like the curves too, but you can be athletic and curvy at the same time. I workout a lot and like to live an active lifestyle. I think being fat presents an image that I do not want to be a part of. Saying that I am shallow on the basis of this post is not correct.

-Jihad

J.A.Sucker

10-19-2005, 04:33 PM

"Getting fat?!? You don't have to worry about that, because I'm dumping you as soon as you hit puberty."

jakethebake

10-19-2005, 04:34 PM

[ QUOTE ]
So you're sitting on the couch with your boyfriend, watching TV. The show you're watching is about a woman who leaves her husband because he gets fat.

Your boyfriend turns to you, and half-jokingly asked, "Yeesh, that's horrible. You wouldn't leave *me* if I got fat, would you?"

Is the relationship now over?

[/ QUOTE ]

The difference is that if a guy did that, he'd actually be kidding. If a woman does it, she's pretending to be kidding, but is actually being insecure and wants an answer.

jaydub

10-19-2005, 04:34 PM

"Fat is not beautiful and should not be accepted".

Part of the problem with this whole question is raised by Jake. To get truly fat indicates a total lack of respect for one's body and appearance.

To be clear I'm not talking about a little excess weight post pregnancy or anything like that. I'm talking so fat that stapling your stomach seems like a tenable option.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:37 PM

"The attitude of the OP?"

I think you might be surprised to find out how many people hold my same views. If someone is fat, that's their problem (well, that doesn't attend to the Health Care issue and some other social commentary, but that's not for this thread or forum for that matter), but that doesn't mean that I have to accept it into my world.

-JOTR

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:38 PM

Exactly, [censored] those stupid fatties. What if she has a thiroid problem (like my mom had that caused her to gain weight until her surgury allowed her to work out again to lose it), or and here's the one that sets me off, what if it's a mental thing. It's a cute concept to think that we're all so self assure that we have no problems but the fact is that each and every one of us does.
If you want to leave a girl cause she's lazy and unmotivated, that's fine, but to simply say "because she's fat" is pathetic.

Cody

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:40 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I think you might be surprised to find out how many people hold my same views.

[/ QUOTE ]

And that's a justification why?

Cody

fluorescenthippo

10-19-2005, 04:42 PM

[ QUOTE ]

"Would you break up with me if I got fat?"

[/ QUOTE ]

yes.

guys are primarly attracted to looks and if part of that (especially a controllable part) deteriorates then they loose attraction. girls are of course more into personality. if you asked her "if i completely changed my personality and wasnt at all the guy you knew when we met would you break up with me?" she would say yes (unless she felt like lying).

dont be ashamed to give a straight up yes. why should you be with someone who decides to be different than they were when you were attracted orginally? and why should they expect you to?

jaydub

10-19-2005, 04:42 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Exactly, [censored] those stupid fatties. What if she has a thiroid problem (like my mom had that caused her to gain weight until her surgury allowed her to work out again to lose it),

[/ QUOTE ]

Slip synthetic T3 or Triac into her vitamins until surgery /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[ QUOTE ]

or and here's the one that sets me off, what if it's a mental thing. It's a cute concept to think that we're all so self assure that we have no problems but the fact is that each and every one of us does.
If you want to leave a girl cause she's lazy and unmotivated, that's fine, but to simply say "because she's fat" is pathetic.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

The point is that being fat is a sympton of why you are leaving, not the cause. That is why this is a stupid question to ask someone.

jakethebake

10-19-2005, 04:44 PM

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:45 PM

[ QUOTE ]
That is why this is a stupid question to ask someone.

[/ QUOTE ]

I hopw I didn't make anyone think that was my feeling from my posts. I agree dumb question, one I wouldn't answer, but regardless, that wasn't my point. My point was dealing with JotR's (and apparently many others) opinion that leaving a girl simply because she's fat isn't shallow.

Cody

asofel

10-19-2005, 04:46 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Exactly, [censored] those stupid fatties. What if she has a thiroid problem (like my mom had that caused her to gain weight until her surgury allowed her to work out again to lose it), or and here's the one that sets me off, what if it's a mental thing. It's a cute concept to think that we're all so self assure that we have no problems but the fact is that each and every one of us does.
If you want to leave a girl cause she's lazy and unmotivated, that's fine, but to simply say "because she's fat" is pathetic.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

I understand what you're saying Cody, and maybe you will agree with me, but I think there're two different things being said here. Some are saying "if you get fat you're done" and others are saying something closer to "physical attraction is important to me, and if someone got huge it would affect that". I don't think there's anything wrong with the second. If I gained 250 pounds somehow I wouldn't be as attractive. Yes, its just physical, but that matters.

Say you date a girl who's great looking, great body. Over time she you find out she's selfish as hell and you break up with her. This would seem more correct to a lot of people, but its just another aspect of what you desire in that person.

If I gained weight (and I should say 'when' as many people fluctuate) I would hope that I had chosen someone who cares enough about me to give me the time to fix it. In the situation like you described, sometimes people gain weight for various reasons. If I was dating a girl that had some condition where she gained weight, I wouldn't dump her because of that, I'd probably try to help her (and myself) lose weight together. Now if you're with someone who just doesn't care, lets themself go, and doesn't make an effort, well I couldnt' really blame someone for not wanting to be with that person after a while.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:46 PM

"thyroid problem" is the biggest copout there is. I have known 3 people with that problem. 2 of them were actively maintaining a very reasonable weight through a whole lot of effort. The other one was obese, but up until 33 years old she was just fine.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:48 PM

[ QUOTE ]
My point was dealing with JotR's (and apparently many others) opinion that leaving a girl simply because she's fat isn't shallow.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

I thought that I made it pretty clear that there was more to it than the simple "you're fat so I'm leaving". If not, sorry.

jaydub

10-19-2005, 04:48 PM

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:49 PM

Guy's I really want you to understand this about me, I agree with leaving her, if she just didn't give a [censored] and fattened up to the point where sex was neasuiating (sp?), but I woudn't leave if it was medical (both physical or mental).
Yes I consider myself to be a shallow person in that respect, I was arguing that saying that it isn't shallow is pathitic.

Cody

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:50 PM

If you wish to keep them private I understand, but would you be so polite as to list them in one post so I can better understand.

Cody

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:51 PM

Agree 100% with your post asofel. I think what you described is the reason for the friction.

Cody

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:52 PM

I'm not trying to make it a justification. I'll tell you what though, its not shallow. I haven't gone into the entire scenario as it would play out in my mind, but I will tell you that I would never just wake up one day and give up on someone I love. I would help them work through it, go to the gym with them, eat better for their sake, and all that other nice stuff. And all that would be part of the conversation that followed the original question. But in the end, yes, I would leave. And no, it wouldn't be shallow.

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:54 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I'm not trying to make it a justification. I'll tell you what though, its not shallow. I haven't gone into the entire scenario as it would play out in my mind, but I will tell you that I would never just wake up one day and give up on someone I love. I would help them work through it, go to the gym with them, eat better for their sake, and all that other nice stuff. And all that would be part of the conversation that followed the original question. But in the end, yes, I would leave. And no, it wouldn't be shallow.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wait so you have a dog you love, it hurts it's leg, you help it do all those little dog leg strengthening excercises and then when it get's better, "c'mon out back ol' yeller, let's do this".
You sir confuse the hell out of me.

Cody

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:56 PM

[ QUOTE ]
If you wish to keep them private I understand, but would you be so polite as to list them in one post so I can better understand.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm only trying to avoid putting myself in a situation like some of my other posts. In them I felt like I had something to contribute to the board that would spark discussion but felt that it needed the full story to help get the point across or whatever. But a couple people objected to that, so out of respect for the board I decided to just pose the question this time. So I understand that it could come off as shallow since it was so vague, but I really think that its understandably NOT shallow if you really consider all the factors that would surround this situation.

Another thought:
Being fat is not just being fat, its a whole state of mind. I'm guessing that if one followed their life via cycles of fitness and well being, one would quickly associate their physical and mental health/state as almost parallel. The times that I've been in the best shape of my life, I've strangely been very successful at everything else and was mentally "clear". If that makes sense it might help a bit.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:58 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'm not trying to make it a justification. I'll tell you what though, its not shallow. I haven't gone into the entire scenario as it would play out in my mind, but I will tell you that I would never just wake up one day and give up on someone I love. I would help them work through it, go to the gym with them, eat better for their sake, and all that other nice stuff. And all that would be part of the conversation that followed the original question. But in the end, yes, I would leave. And no, it wouldn't be shallow.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wait so you have a dog you love, it hurts it's leg, you help it do all those little dog leg strengthening excercises and then when it get's better, "c'mon out back ol' yeller, let's do this".
You sir confuse the hell out of me.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

I thought it was obvious that I was implying that my help was ill-recieved, or at least unsuccessful.

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:58 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"thyroid problem" is the biggest copout there is. I have known 3 people with that problem. 2 of them were actively maintaining a very reasonable weight through a whole lot of effort. The other one was obese, but up until 33 years old she was just fine.

[/ QUOTE ]

I was there when they pulled out part of her thyroid that was damn near the size of a bowtie and I was at the consoltation when the doctoer told her she would gain weight, I was also at the gym with her when she lost it back.
I'll thank you to keep you opinions about that to yourself, until you've been there.

Cody

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 04:59 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I was also at the gym with her when she lost it back.
Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

I think that really helps make my point.

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 04:59 PM

You didn't imply that, you said (excuse me for paraphrasing) "I'll do all the things to help her, we talked about it, but in the end I'd leave."

Cody

phage

10-19-2005, 05:01 PM

Would you really leave your wife if she became fat?
Maybe you are right and a weight gain shows that people aren't concerned with their appearance etc. But what about people who aren't concerned with that sort of thing. Can you see how there could be a group of people for whom an obsession about body image would be a turn off.

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 05:02 PM

No it doesn't, if we'd abandoned her when she gained the weight, who knows what would've happend.

Cody

Blarg

10-19-2005, 05:04 PM

I would work with someone through temporary conditions, or if they were sick, but not if they made a permanent lifestyle choice to just not give a damn about their health or looks. Both are important to me, and fat does a number on both of them. I like partners with an active interest in health.

I'm just generally not attracted to people who are not in control of themselves, whether it be an addiction to arguing, drama, drugs, booze, cigarettes, whining, shopping, eating, etc. I understand, but don't admire it, and don't want to make it a part of my life. I am attracted to women who are looking to make themselves and their lives better, both for themselves and for their partner, and don't like people who can't wait to begin their downward spiral, who look forward to it with relief and joy, or act like it's anyone's fault but their own. Nobody has to be superman or superwoman, but you should at least not try to slide backwards. Especially while you're young. If you can't control your weight when you're young, you're going to be a diabetic whale when you get older. And look worse and worse every day on the way there, and have a very diminished quality of life.

I'm definitely one of those who thinks that the shape a person keeps themselves in is indicative of a lot of other things about them.

jaydub

10-19-2005, 05:04 PM

[ QUOTE ]
No it doesn't, if we'd abandoned her when she gained the weight, who knows what would've happend.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't think you are comprehending what he is writing. He is saying that he would work with her to lose the weight by going to the gym with her and helping her structure her diet. If however, she did not accept this help, he would leave.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 05:06 PM

Well said. I think that's more well-put than anything I've said and it's exactly how I feel about it. I don't think its that hard to understand that feeling this way is not shallow.

jaydub

10-19-2005, 05:06 PM

[ QUOTE ]
But what about people who aren't concerned with that sort of thing. Can you see how there could be a group of people for whom an obsession about body image would be a turn off.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes and we break up with them well before marriage /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 05:06 PM

Again if you got that from his writing, I would bet that you were already on his side (I suppose the oppistie argument could be made for my side, so save your breath) however I don't think anything he wrote, which I parapharsed above, hinted that she was unreceptive, just that "In the end, he would leave".

Cody

Blarg

10-19-2005, 05:08 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Would you really leave your wife if she became fat?
Maybe you are right and a weight gain shows that people aren't concerned with their appearance etc. But what about people who aren't concerned with that sort of thing. Can you see how there could be a group of people for whom an obsession about body image would be a turn off.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, but I wouldn't marry one. And depending on how obssession is defined, I might very well find them stupid. There's a big fad going around now about "fat acceptance" and such. Most people need to accept the fact that they should get up off their ass and get some exercise, and stop eating so much crap, not that their fat is either cool or unremarkable.

phage

10-19-2005, 05:08 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
But what about people who aren't concerned with that sort of thing. Can you see how there could be a group of people for whom an obsession about body image would be a turn off.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes and we break up with them well before marriage /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[/ QUOTE ]
And the chubby chasers rejoice! /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 05:09 PM

Again I agree, if she says "I don't want to move, here comes the gerth" that's a personality choice, but what I read from JotR is that "It's fat and out door" he refused to give a qualifier and that attitude is terrible, in my opinion.

Cody

jaydub

10-19-2005, 05:11 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Again if you got that from his writing, I would bet that you were already on his side (I suppose the oppistie argument could be made for my side, so save your breath) however I don't think anything he wrote, which I parapharsed above, hinted that she was unreceptive, just that "In the end, he would leave".

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

His original post was missing a couple words and thus was logically inconsistent. I added those words in red:

[ QUOTE ]
I'm not trying to make it a justification. I'll tell you what though, its not shallow. I haven't gone into the entire scenario as it would play out in my mind, but I will tell you that I would never just wake up one day and give up on someone I love. I would help them work through it, go to the gym with them, eat better for their sake, and all that other nice stuff. And all that would be part of the conversation that followed the original question. But in the end, yes, <font color="red">if this failed</font> I would leave. And no, it wouldn't be shallow.

[/ QUOTE ]

Richard Tanner

10-19-2005, 05:19 PM

With those corrections I went from hating his ideals, to simply saying "Well it's not my play, but to each their own", thank you for the clarification.

Cody

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 05:21 PM

[ QUOTE ]
With those corrections I went from hating his ideals, to simply saying "Well it's not my play, but to each their own", thank you for the clarification.

Cody

[/ QUOTE ]

Good, I appreciate it. Now lets just let this thread die a happy death /images/graemlins/smile.gif

stickman

10-19-2005, 05:31 PM

Absolutely!!

RRRRICK

10-19-2005, 05:40 PM

diebitter

10-19-2005, 05:42 PM

"No, of course not"

Next

jaydub

10-19-2005, 05:44 PM

[ QUOTE ]

How about

"If I die first will you re marry"

[/ QUOTE ]

Only if your sister is single.

Blarg

10-19-2005, 05:47 PM

The younger one.

shant

10-19-2005, 07:54 PM

How fat are we talking?

Josh W

10-19-2005, 07:57 PM

I'm not gonna read the whole thread, but the right answer is:

Baby, I love you and respect you. As long as you love and respect yourself, I will love and respect you, too.

Josh

CORed

10-19-2005, 08:22 PM

David04

10-19-2005, 08:28 PM

[ QUOTE ]
"thyroid problem" is the biggest copout there is.

[/ QUOTE ]
No it isn't. I don't think you understand the phrase "cop out"

Consult a dictionary, let me know how it goes.

JihadOnTheRiver

10-19-2005, 11:09 PM

[ QUOTE ]
How fat are we talking?

[/ QUOTE ]
That's a good question. I'm not talking chubby, I'm talking more like actually fat. Definetely unattractive. Like has a serious gut with all the rolls. Basically what I'm saying is NOT just chubby....fat....

KaneKungFu123

10-19-2005, 11:12 PM

you dont answer these questions dude.

just smack her ass and start massaging her shoulders and tell her how beautiful she is or whatever.

KaneKungFu123

10-19-2005, 11:13 PM

[ QUOTE ]
consider also the fact that if you ever settle down with a woman for the long haul, she will become fat and unattractive.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is something that i am really struggling with.

KaneKungFu123

10-19-2005, 11:15 PM

[ QUOTE ]

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

[/ QUOTE ]

ROFL

wacki

10-19-2005, 11:31 PM

[ QUOTE ]
if i was a guy...and a girl said that to me....

id tell them to stop being so insecure...

if guys ask an equivalent statement to me id look at them and walk out the door...end of relationship

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]

yes - wether i was a guy or girl i would do the same thing - if someone asks me a question b/c they are insecure...a DUMB question...then im done with that person.

[/ QUOTE ]

Will you make up your mind you hypocrite!? Holy cow, we haven't even left the thread and you are contradicting yourself.

peachy

10-19-2005, 11:40 PM

[ QUOTE ]
As the bad-ass, it would seem like you'd be more suited to someone less bad-ass who complements you, rather than someone equally bad-ass with whom things are more likely to become a running contest. What do you think about this?

[/ QUOTE ]

just b/c u arent insecure doesnt mean it will be a contest b/w the two of u

imported_anacardo

10-19-2005, 11:41 PM

Well, not necessarily of course, but the dangers become far greater. No other thoughts on the subject?

peachy

10-19-2005, 11:44 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

uuummm its called being honest and not sticking around in something i know wont work...its not worth my time and im not gonna sugar coat it

[/ QUOTE ]

So you're sitting on the couch with your boyfriend, watching TV. The show you're watching is about a woman who leaves her husband because he gets fat.

Your boyfriend turns to you, and half-jokingly asked, "Yeesh, that's horrible. You wouldn't leave *me* if I got fat, would you?"

Is the relationship now over?

[/ QUOTE ]

try reading all my post before u ask a dumb question to attack me b/c u have nothing better to do...

if its a joke (any question related to self esteem) of course i dont care...but if they are serious its over

peachy

10-19-2005, 11:48 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Well, not necessarily of course, but the dangers become far greater. No other thoughts on the subject?

[/ QUOTE ]

no because ive never had a problem with it

peachy

10-19-2005, 11:49 PM

[ QUOTE ]

Will you make up your mind you hypocrite!? Holy cow, we haven't even left the thread and you are contradicting yourself.

[/ QUOTE ]

o stfu...u know what i meant...dont be a dumbass

durron597

10-20-2005, 06:41 AM

[ QUOTE ]
LOL....I don't know....if a Mod wants me to try it, I will...I am a professional writer, after all....

Or maybe just an "Ask Dominic" thread that's only about relationships/sex/etc.

I'm game.

[/ QUOTE ]

I would like you to try it. Or did you mean OOT mod?

jaydub

10-20-2005, 09:22 AM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
consider also the fact that if you ever settle down with a woman for the long haul, she will become fat and unattractive.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is something that i am really struggling with.

[/ QUOTE ]

Why? Not all women become fat. The previous statement is bullshit. Ever been to a gym? How many 40+ soccer moms are in there busting their asses to not get fat?

imported_The Vibesman

10-20-2005, 09:46 AM

[ QUOTE ]

How about

"If I die first will you re marry"

[/ QUOTE ]

"No, I'd just console myself with hookers, beer and gambling."

jakethebake

10-20-2005, 09:48 AM

[ QUOTE ]
How about

"If I die first will you re marry"

[/ QUOTE ]

I never make the same mistake twice.

arod15

10-20-2005, 09:57 AM

Of course not your my heart.....

Blarg

10-20-2005, 10:35 AM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
consider also the fact that if you ever settle down with a woman for the long haul, she will become fat and unattractive.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is something that i am really struggling with.

[/ QUOTE ]

Why? Not all women become fat. The previous statement is bullshit. Ever been to a gym? How many 40+ soccer moms are in there busting their asses to not get fat?

[/ QUOTE ]

That's the thing. So many people say that their personal choices are really just something that couldn't be helped, and try to dodge responsibility for it. Pregnancy just "happens," becoming fat just can't be helped, getting weak is natural, relationships lose their vitality automatically. The truth is, there are choices all along the way. If we make our choices, we should at least acknowledge them, not try to pass them off as fate or some other crap like that. When you get older, you won't be as fit as you were when young, but you don't have to be lazy. You don't have to eat like a child instead of an adult. The age at which people accept being overweight is falling rapidly, and it's ridiculous at this point. Marriage is not a license to stop caring anymore.

Dominic

10-20-2005, 11:22 AM

I'll give it a go. [censored] has PMd me and has come up with a workable format...they'll be something in the next couple of days....

pokerdirty

10-20-2005, 11:45 AM

Easy E

10-20-2005, 12:42 PM

[ QUOTE ]
my honest answer is yes, for various reasons (and no I do not think this is shallow, my reasons are valid).

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm waiting.....

Easy E

10-20-2005, 12:44 PM

What body weight would make you angry enough to dump someone?

HopeydaFish

10-20-2005, 01:40 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

uuummm its called being honest and not sticking around in something i know wont work...its not worth my time and im not gonna sugar coat it

[/ QUOTE ]

So you're sitting on the couch with your boyfriend, watching TV. The show you're watching is about a woman who leaves her husband because he gets fat.

Your boyfriend turns to you, and half-jokingly asked, "Yeesh, that's horrible. You wouldn't leave *me* if I got fat, would you?"

Is the relationship now over?

[/ QUOTE ]

try reading all my post before u ask a dumb question to attack me b/c u have nothing better to do...

[/ QUOTE ]

I wasn't attacking you, I was just curious as to how strict your "One wrong question and I'm out the door" policy is.

[ QUOTE ]

if its a joke (any question related to self esteem) of course i dont care...but if they are serious its over

[/ QUOTE ]

How long do your relationships usually last before the guy slips up and asks a question that gets him dumped? It sounds like you have an itchy trigger finger when it comes to giving guys the boot.

jaydub

10-20-2005, 01:48 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

uuummm its called being honest and not sticking around in something i know wont work...its not worth my time and im not gonna sugar coat it

[/ QUOTE ]

So you're sitting on the couch with your boyfriend, watching TV. The show you're watching is about a woman who leaves her husband because he gets fat.

Your boyfriend turns to you, and half-jokingly asked, "Yeesh, that's horrible. You wouldn't leave *me* if I got fat, would you?"

Is the relationship now over?

[/ QUOTE ]

try reading all my post before u ask a dumb question to attack me b/c u have nothing better to do...

[/ QUOTE ]

I wasn't attacking you, I was just curious as to how strict your "One wrong question and I'm out the door" policy is.

[ QUOTE ]

if its a joke (any question related to self esteem) of course i dont care...but if they are serious its over

[/ QUOTE ]

How long do your relationships usually last before the guy slips up and asks a question that gets him dumped? It sounds like you have an itchy trigger finger when it comes to giving guys the boot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes but she's never wrong when she does. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

HopeydaFish

10-20-2005, 01:56 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

uuummm its called being honest and not sticking around in something i know wont work...its not worth my time and im not gonna sugar coat it

[/ QUOTE ]

So you're sitting on the couch with your boyfriend, watching TV. The show you're watching is about a woman who leaves her husband because he gets fat.

Your boyfriend turns to you, and half-jokingly asked, "Yeesh, that's horrible. You wouldn't leave *me* if I got fat, would you?"

Is the relationship now over?

[/ QUOTE ]

try reading all my post before u ask a dumb question to attack me b/c u have nothing better to do...

[/ QUOTE ]

I wasn't attacking you, I was just curious as to how strict your "One wrong question and I'm out the door" policy is.

[ QUOTE ]

if its a joke (any question related to self esteem) of course i dont care...but if they are serious its over

[/ QUOTE ]

How long do your relationships usually last before the guy slips up and asks a question that gets him dumped? It sounds like you have an itchy trigger finger when it comes to giving guys the boot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes but she's never wrong when she does. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

No no no...sometimes she's wrong, but she never makes mistakes. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

Apparently there's a difference. /images/graemlins/wink.gif

10-20-2005, 02:01 PM

"Why don't you try it and we'll see what happens?"
or
"How fat are we talking here?"

It depends how "fat" she is already. If she eats well and exercises regularly, then her getting fat would be due to a lack of discipline. We'd have to talk, as our goals might be distant from each other's.

I don't think her percentage of body fat has anything to do with whether or not I'd stay with her. However, repeated occurences of her asking this question would probably cause me to ignore her... permanently.