Bad Situation, whats your play?

[SittinOnDubsWGW]

Alright, a little background. I've just recently moved into an apt with a good friend (Chuck) that I've known for roughly 9-10 years and an acquaintance from school, that I've known for about 3 years (Dave). I'm not real close with Dave, but he's always seemed to be an alright guy, and I've never had any problems with the guy, and I consider him a friend.

So fast forward to last night, I come home from after playing in a cash game with some buds, and I come in and Chuck's hanging out with one of his women in the front room watching TV. I go to drop some stuff off in my bedroom and notice Dave's girlfriend say pretty loudly, "get off, you're on my stomach, it hurts." I kinda just brushed it off, and thought that they might have been play wrestling around or something at first.

As I walk back out to the living room, I'm talking to Chuck, and we hear some more loud screaming (female) coming from Dave's room. Chuck says to me, "dude, that's REAL fighting going on in there, its been going on for like an hour, what should we do." At this point we hear some more "owwww, you're hurting me, let go Dave, LET GO."

Both of us are like "what the [censored], what should we do." Neither one of us has ever had to deal with a situation like this before.

I decide that I'm going to go see if Dave's door is unlocked and I'm going to try to de-esculate the situation. I go up to the door, the door is locked, sh*t. I decide that I'm going to knock on the door and make sure that my presence is known and that if I hear a cry out of "help" the door is coming down. I stuck around for about an hour as there was more yelling and whatnot, before the situation seemed to have calmed down and no more yelling and whatnot, neither one ever came out of the room before I left to go over to my girlfriends.

Was this the best way to handle the situation? What are some recommendations. I think

[Your Mom]

I would yell real loud, what the hell is going on in there and take it from there. If need be, that door is coming down to help the chick. I don't give a damn if it's a friend or not. Hurting females = not cool.

[imported_The Vibesman]

What would you do if the girl were your sister?

Yeah I mean you can't just sit there and let it happen, I would probably yell in there also. Be prepared to fight Dave as well

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
I would yell real loud, what the hell is going on in there and take it from there. If need be, that door is coming down to help the chick. I don't give a damn if it's a friend or not. Hurting females = not cool.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is a good answer and I'm betting if he knows you can hear them, he'll stop.

So you have no idea how it ended? What will you do when that awful smell starts coming from his room in a week or so?

[FouTight]

"Do you need help?" really loudly, if you hear a desperate sounding girl say yes, break down door.

If you hear anything else, tell them you are calling the police if the door isn't open in 30 seconds.

game over.

[4_2_it]

Are you actually asking what to do here? You bang on that door until you here the girl say everything is cool or you bust in ready to rumble. There is no other option. Afterwards, you consider kicking Dave out if he's hitting women.

[nothumb]

I would not leave them alone together. I would not leave the house. I would yell at your roommate for letting it go on that long. I would ask them what the [censored] was going on and if necessary I would kick the girl out of the house until things calm down. If it ever happened again Dave would move out.

NT

[FouTight]

[ QUOTE ]
Are you actually asking what to do here? You bang on that door until you here the girl say everything is cool or you bust in ready to rumble. There is no other option. Afterwards, you consider kicking Dave out if he's hitting women.

[/ QUOTE ]


This doesn't work though, because she could be too scared to say anything is wrong and pretend it is okay, you MUST get that door open quickly.

[SittinOnDubsWGW]

[ QUOTE ]
I would yell real loud, what the hell is going on in there and take it from there. If need be, that door is coming down to help the chick. I don't give a damn if it's a friend or not. Hurting females = not cool.

[/ QUOTE ]

This was basically my line. When I knocked on the door, I did so very loud, and let it be known that if I hear a cry for help the door is coming down.

I completely agree= hurting chicks is definitely not cool and is a horrible horrible thing.

I just didn't know if how I handled it was the proper way of handling the situation.

Chuck's woman saw them together today at one of the cafeterias on campus and just thought "what a stupid stupid girl, to stay in that situation."

[flair1239]

I would have a talk with Chuck and make sure that you guys are on the same page. Then have a no nonsense talk with Dave, telling him something like "Your relationship is none of our business and what goes on between you and your GF is just between you two. But the next time we hear something like that, the door is coming down or the cops are being called."

Don't have to be a dick about it, just point out that is the way it will be.

[27offsuit]

You're obviously smaller and weaker than Dave and he could kick your ass with one arm.

Skulk away. Its all you can do.

[27offsuit]

[ QUOTE ]
I would not leave them alone together. I would not leave the house. I would yell at your roommate for letting it go on that long. I would ask them what the [censored] was going on and if necessary I would kick the girl out of the house until things calm down. If it ever happened again Dave would move out.

NT

[/ QUOTE ]


You must be big enough and strong enough to beat down Dave.

Either that, or you're full of sh*t.

[4_2_it]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Are you actually asking what to do here? You bang on that door until you here the girl say everything is cool or you bust in ready to rumble. There is no other option. Afterwards, you consider kicking Dave out if he's hitting women.

[/ QUOTE ]


This doesn't work though, because she could be too scared to say anything is wrong and pretend it is okay, you MUST get that door open quickly.

[/ QUOTE ]

If I hear the sound of hitting or screaming that door is coming door (actually probably quicker to pick the lock if it's a typical interior door.) If I don't hear a calm everything's cool Dave will experience what it's like to eat through a straw. Glad to know you've got my back!

Full disclosure -- I have two daughters and a zero tolerance for anyone who roughs up a lady. I'll happily plead guilty to the assault charges if I am defending someone from real or imminent violence.

[Exitonly]

I can't imagine any kind of real fighting that would last more than 5 seconds between a guy and a girl... i'd guess that was rough sex you heard, and your knocking on the door just made it awkward for them and they tried to keep it quiet.


That said, if you reall thoguht they were fighting, slamming on the door, with the intentions of taking it down if you dont get a good answer, would probably be best.

[willie]

[ QUOTE ]
You're obviously smaller and weaker than Dave and he could kick your ass with one arm.

Skulk away. Its all you can do.

[/ QUOTE ]

lmfao....this is what i was thinking

i would have definitely kicked the door in like i was on the swat team. no fair warning, no nothing.

gives him time to put his hand on her mouth and be like, "say something and i'll kill you"


all hell would have broken loose.

[HopeydaFish]

Tell him if he's going to act like that, he can move back into his frat house.

[Rev. Good Will]

knock on the door, and ask whats going on

[Exitonly]

you can't just barge in there unannouncecd, Rough sex and fighting i'd guess don't soudn all that different, ,and "Ouch you're on my stomach" doesnt sound exaclty like fighting.


You break down his door and he's plowing her in some wierd position, and you're gonna be the biggest douche in the world.

[nothumb]

[ QUOTE ]
You must be big enough and strong enough to beat down Dave.

Either that, or you're full of sh*t.

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, who knows if I'm bigger than Dave, I've never met the guy. Given my size I am a slight favorite here, but it's probably close. I handle myself pretty well and rarely do people put me to that sort of test. (In my job it's something you have to be ready for on a daily basis).

But that's beside the point. Yes, I would scrap with Dave if he came out swinging when I busted into his room while he was beating up his girlfriend. It's something called principle. Anyway, it's unlikely to be a major issue because there are three other people in the house and Dave will most likely feel ashamed when I start taking a bite out of his ass for his uncivilized behavior. And if he was the kind of guy I was really, truly afraid of, I wouldn't be living with him.

So, anyway, it doesn't matter how big Dave is. The situation is unlikely to come to blows and if it does I have backup. Although it sounds like roomie here is a pushover so maybe we should discount those outs a bit.

NT

[eviljeff]

just call it "Operation Dave's gf's Freedom" and no one will care if you find WMD after you take over his room.

[Exitonly]

lol, nh sir.

[gamblore99]

[ QUOTE ]
you can't just barge in there unannouncecd, Rough sex and fighting i'd guess don't soudn all that different, ,and "Ouch you're on my stomach" doesnt sound exaclty like fighting.


You break down his door and he's plowing her in some wierd position, and you're gonna be the biggest douche in the world.

[/ QUOTE ]

No. breaking the door + them just having sex = Hilarious story. And later when you tell this story you will look like a brave/courageous/caring guy.

[BCPVP]

[ QUOTE ]
As I walk back out to the living room, I'm talking to Chuck, and we hear some more loud screaming (female) coming from Dave's room. Chuck says to me, "dude, that's REAL fighting going on in there, its been going on for like an hour, what should we do." At this point we hear some more "owwww, you're hurting me, let go Dave, LET GO."

[/ QUOTE ]
Wait, so your roomie, Chuck, sat and listened to what he thought was real (violent) fighting between a guy and girl for an hour and didn't do anything about it? WTF is the matter with him? Chuck must be an idiot.

You probably should try and get it on in some 3way action

[cdxx]

[ QUOTE ]
I stuck around for about an hour as there was more yelling and whatnot, before the situation seemed to have calmed down and no more yelling and whatnot, neither one ever came out of the room before I left to go over to my girlfriends.

[/ QUOTE ]

good move, she is probably dead and he is packing her into ziplock bags.

[imported_The Vibesman]

[ QUOTE ]
I can't imagine any kind of real fighting that would last more than 5 seconds between a guy and a girl...

[/ QUOTE ]

Spoken like a man who has never had a fight with a girl. I'm surprised the married guys aren't all over this.