How shy is your bladder?

[bluefeet]

Sup sup? 1st OP in OOT - getting a little burned out on the poker lately /images/graemlins/frown.gif

[Note: I tried a search with no luck. My apologies if this has been covered]

So...I'm driving with my brother to Detroit for the Paul McCartney concert tonight (his girlfriend didn't want to go), when the ever common subject of 'shy bladder syndrome' came up. It seems that all of the males in my family have some degree of this problem.

For me, it's not too bad. Give me a little divider - some 'personal space'...usually not a problem. Though at work (a large office complex=busy bathroom), I usually opt for a stall even if the task is limited to a #1. Give me two beers, and I piss off the back of my golf-cart with my female partner in the ride. BUT, I do have my share of no-go's.

Occasionally, I'll hit an empty restroom, prepare the presentation to the porcelain gods, when someone strolls up along side me. I'm cooked - it ain't happening. I'll try counting wall tiles, counting vowels/consonants in the urinal makers name, etc...SOMETHING to keep those thoughts from creeping in. Worse, is the sporting/concert events. I am INCAPABLE of going when there is a line behind me. The added pressure of knowing they're waiting is just too much. The 'safe' stall is almost always my choice.

My brother? Beyond help. His case is so severe, he cannot use a public restroom PERIOD. Nor can he go in someone's house. It has really affected every aspect of his social life/planning. Including a 90min drive to and from, the concert, parking problems, etc...he's looking at 8 hours without a chance in hell of taking a leak. His only recourse is to not consume liquid of any kind prior & during the outing - which also means he's reluctant to eat!

Unfortunately, his job has him traveling quite a bit. He'll be at a hotel out of town, sitting through hours of seminars, taking his 15min 'break', literally sprinting through the hotel to get back to his room vs. using the public restroom nearby.

So anyway, we make jokes about it all the time - resigned to our fate. But when wondering just how many others are out there, I told him I know just the place to find out /images/graemlins/wink.gif

[siccjay]

Weird.

I could pee in the sink with a bathroom full of people.

[IggyWH]

I wouldn't say I've had a few no-shows, but at times it's a real struggle. It mostly happens when you're pissing in a sink with others standing around you.

I just force myself to start peeing, which takes a little while. Once the stream starts, it'll die but since it already starts flowing, every guy knows you can't just stop and go on with your day.

[TheMainEvent]

[ QUOTE ]
Weird.

I could pee in the sink with a bathroom full of people.

[/ QUOTE ]

Me too. I remember seeing an OOT thread where there were a lot of posts basically saying that they avoid urinals like the plague. This amazed me.

[siccjay]

I mean I try not to just go up and piss next to someone, but if I have to I have no trouble.

[x2ski]

Your post is me exactly.

It hasn't always been this way... It actually didn't start until I graduated college and got a shitty white-collar cubicle job. The problem slowly got worse and worse the longer I worked there, but I absolutely despised the job, and attributed a lot of it to stress.

Things have been getting better since I quit, but it's now been 3 years and I wouldn't say I'm 100% cured.

I've always believed if someone came up with a widely proven solution to this, they would be freakin' bagillionaires. I'm pretty sure it's a fairly common problem.

[Blarg]

I love when Homer has R.E.M. over to his house to play in his garage, and one of the band guys says he doesn't can't pee in the urinal Homer put in there with Lenny looking all the time.

CUT TO:

He's trying to pee. Off to his left is Lenny, rocking back and forth on his heels and smiling, staring and staring.

LENNY: So, gotta pee, eh?

WHOEVER THE DUDE WAS: Aw, forget it.

Love that scene. I've known a few Lennys too. I've never understood the fascination to see other guy's peckers that some dudes have. Some go through some real gymnastics and seem almost desperate. That can take me from relaxed to self-conscious real fast.

I'm usually okay, but every once in a while it just won't come. That makes me feel like a total idiot. And of course, I'll just have to go a minute later. But when that happens, I'll again be at the back of the 10 minute line at a concern or whatever. Agony and stupidity combined, with very little conscious control.

I find visualization really helps, picturing a gut busting flood or something before I even get there so that by the time I get there I'm almost going in my pants.

The problem doesn't happen too much, but it seems really random.

[bluefeet]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm usually okay, but every once in a while it just won't come. That makes me feel like a total idiot.

[/ QUOTE ]

lol..that moment of failure sucks. I try to cover it up...shake it a few times, throw in a cough or two, actually flush - fooling no one I'm sure.

The times where against all odds I am victorious are almost as pathetic. Making sure I'm hitting the water so others can hear - "see boys, I'm pissin"...call my brother up "I pissed like a big boy today!".

For me it has nothing to do with privacy. I'm not terribly modest. I guess maybe it's a deeply rooted psychological fear of failure in some shape or form. Should make for an interesting phone call when I call my HMO looking for pre-approved counseling /images/graemlins/wink.gif

[Escape]

I'm somewhere between option 2 and 3. I hate those urinals where you piss shoulder to shoulder, but I don't care if there is a small wall between them. I need some privacy /images/graemlins/blush.gif

[Blarg]

Plus protection from splashback. My splashback is bad enough, but like hell I want somebody else's.

[Blarg]

[ QUOTE ]
Your post is me exactly.

It hasn't always been this way... It actually didn't start until I graduated college and got a shitty white-collar cubicle job. The problem slowly got worse and worse the longer I worked there, but I absolutely despised the job, and attributed a lot of it to stress.

Things have been getting better since I quit, but it's now been 3 years and I wouldn't say I'm 100% cured.

I've always believed if someone came up with a widely proven solution to this, they would be freakin' bagillionaires. I'm pretty sure it's a fairly common problem.

[/ QUOTE ]

From experience I know that those jobs make your pecker feel smaller day by day. That's what made you stress out. Your previously adequate pecker was suddenly yet another doubtful matter.

Good thing you got out before it vanished. Your self-confidence and self-respect, I mean. /images/graemlins/wink.gif

[whiskeytown]

it used to be a major problem with me when younger, and I still won't use the trough - (those long [censored] troughs at the Metrodome piss me off)

but when I started drinking I totally lost that shyness in the bathroom - I suppose it has something to do with those loosened inhibitions.

nowadays - I don't go out in public anyways....LOL - but if there are two urinals and a stall in a bathroom, and someone's at one of the urinals, I'll head for the stall just to not look too eager to stand next to them /images/graemlins/grin.gif

RB

need drunnk options on here too, i can't go with anyone around sober, drunk and we are peein in the ore cart all night,

[lastsamurai]

welcome to the darkside of 2+2<font color="blue"> blue </font>

[Sightless]

I can't go in Urinal or if its like 2-3 people in the bathroom and they can hear you):

[diebitter]

Yeah, I get this sometimes. If I find myself in a situation where this might happen, I hold on and hold on, so it's just gotta come out when I finally go.

[Stu Pidasso]

[ QUOTE ]
My brother? Beyond help. His case is so severe, he cannot use a public restroom PERIOD. Nor can he go in someone's house. It has really affected every aspect of his social life/planning. Including a 90min drive to and from, the concert, parking problems, etc...he's looking at 8 hours without a chance in hell of taking a leak. His only recourse is to not consume liquid of any kind prior &amp; during the outing - which also means he's reluctant to eat!

[/ QUOTE ]

Perhaps your brother can get help for his affliction from these (http://www.paruresis.org/) people.

Stu

You have a hard time peeing in public because you are self conscious about the size of your dick, and sense that you may be inadequate.

[Duke]

Have you ever just tried going when you had to? At a certain point you're basically going to piss yourself (since I imagine your body is too intelligent to allow you to rupture your own bladder), so wouldn't going then help you combat this phobia or whatever it is?

~D

[Slow Play Ray]

[ QUOTE ]
Weird.

I have peed in the sink with a bathroom full of people.

[/ QUOTE ]

[Bradyams]

Have the same problem sometimes. Was worse when I was younger, but it's progressively getting better.

It really sucks when I have to pee before a 90 minute lecture, and I go in the bathroom, and the urinals are lined up with dudes. I'll usually try to get a stall.

[Duffman]

I can go anywhere, but it takes me a little longer to get started if more people are around.

[kyro]

I think I am exactly like you. I cannot go if someone is standing a few feet from me, even if it's painful.

[jakethebake]

I rarely have any problems. The only time i can remember was this one time when I was in the Marines we got a surprise piss test. The officer of the day decides to shine up his officer's sword while standing over me while I'm trying to go.

[bravos1]

Can't image you trying to piss into a trough... your pecker my just take a hike into your midsection instantly turning into a vagina.. jk of course... I am happy not to have this problem, but my bro-in-law has it pretty bad.. only in a stall and is a no-go if pressured.

[Blarg]

Heh, I think someone moving a sword back and forth a few feet away might make me reluctant to whip out my little Blarg too.

[bluefeet]

[ QUOTE ]
I rarely have any problems. The only time i can remember was this one time when I was in the Marines we got a surprise piss test. The officer of the day decides to shine up his officer's sword while standing over me while I'm trying to go.

[/ QUOTE ]

I spent 10 years in the AirForce myself. Those piss tests were the worst. Like you said (and for those not as fortunate), they have to visually witness the transaction.

In our program, the tester and testees (pardon the pun) were drawn at random. A had the dubious distinction of playing the witness role one day. I stood shoulder to shoulder with this middle aged guy (in civi's), about to bust a vein in his forehead, trying to squeeze out his 4-6oz. Trying to put him at ease, I threw in some small-talk - "so, what do you do on base?". His reply..."I'm your base commander airman, shut up and let me piss!" /images/graemlins/blush.gif

[TheMainEvent]

[ QUOTE ]
The officer of the day decides to shine up his officer's sword while standing over me while I'm trying to go.

[/ QUOTE ]

Is this a metaphor, or...?

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
In our program, the tester and testees (pardon the pun) were drawn at random.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ours was a little different. They would just come rouse the whole barracks at 4:30am on a Sat morning. They wouldn't tell you what was going on. Of course the first thing you did was piss and get dressed. Then they'd want you to piss again. So half the barracks would sit around half the day on a Saturday trying to piss. The thing was, if it wasn't a piss test and you didn't piss, then they'd have you off on some stupid exercise someplace about to piss your pants.

[STLantny]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I rarely have any problems. The only time i can remember was this one time when I was in the Marines we got a surprise piss test. The officer of the day decides to shine up his officer's sword while standing over me while I'm trying to go.

[/ QUOTE ]

I spent 10 years in the AirForce myself. Those piss tests were the worst. Like you said (and for those not as fortunate), they have to visually witness the transaction.

In our program, the tester and testees (pardon the pun) were drawn at random. A had the dubious distinction of playing the witness role one day. I stood shoulder to shoulder with this middle aged guy (in civi's), about to bust a vein in his forehead, trying to squeeze out his 4-6oz. Trying to put him at ease, I threw in some small-talk - "so, what do you do on base?". His reply..."I'm your base commander airman, shut up and let me piss!" /images/graemlins/blush.gif

[/ QUOTE ]


hah...ya....because guys love other dudes talking to them whilet they are peeing...not uncomfortable at all....

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
The officer of the day decides to shine up his officer's sword while standing over me while I'm trying to go.

[/ QUOTE ]

Is this a metaphor, or...?

[/ QUOTE ]

Errr...no.

[Blarg]

Yeah, the guy who suddenly seems like the world's friendliest stranger at the next urinal over doesn't make me feel very comfortable. I'd just as soon not make any lifelong friends with dudes who can't wait to get to know me better under circumstances in which my pecker's hanging out. I'm pretty unsociable in bathrooms.

[gamblore99]

peeing is fine. its just the trough i hate. Does anyone not hate the trough?

[McGahee]

I have a huge stagefreight problem and it sucks. I have left bars just to piss in an alley outside. It's really annoying because none of my friends have this problem. Good to hear I'm not the only one though.

[Blarg]

Sometimes I wonder if anyone, just to be perverse, purposely tries to make people uncomfortable this way. I'm pretty sure it must happen once in a while.

[McGahee]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'm usually okay, but every once in a while it just won't come. That makes me feel like a total idiot.

[/ QUOTE ]

lol..that moment of failure sucks. I try to cover it up...shake it a few times, throw in a cough or two, actually flush - fooling no one I'm sure.


[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/laugh.gif My personal go-to maneuver is the "spit while shaking" which cues the auto-flushers.