Weird Situation with my Dry Cleaners

[IndieMatty]

So I have been living in the same apartment for almost 3.5 years, I regularly visit the same launderers at least 2xs a week. The service/prices are great. They do small favors for me on the spot, and I go out of my way (I pass two other dry cleaners on the way) just to give them my business.

Over the years the family, A wonderful family of Chinese descent, consisting of Grandfather/Grandmother, daughter/husband, occasionally a little 7-10 yr old girl (who has a crush on me) have been very nice to me . I am a pretty sociable guy, and I enjoy my 10-15 minutes a week of interaction. They know whats going in my life, and try to do weird things like set me up on dates, and give me food. (The other day they brought me apples from their sunday apple picking trip). I actually really enjoy all of this, and I always leave the store smiling; it's like an extended family almost, I don't know. ANYWAY....

I don't know their friggin names!!! They are luckily enough to know my name from the ticket I started filling out (they now call me "Mr. Matt"); but I feel horrible that I have been "close" with these people for years and don't have any clue to their first names.

When Christmas or the Chinese New Year comes, I want to do something nice for them, but I also want to write a card. I also think it's common courtesy that I should know their name.

What the hell should I do?

[jakethebake]

Take a friend in and introduce him. "This is John." They introduce themselves to him and you find out the name.

you sound sweet, just ask them. i don't think it will hurt their feelings, but i would look for a business card first /images/graemlins/grin.gif.

[diebitter]

Ask them very politely. Act the dummy for not asking before (won't be a strethc cos you are the dummy for...etc).

They'll probably get a great laugh from this, just do it /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Take a friend in and introduce him. "This is John." They introduce themselves to him and you find out the name.

[/ QUOTE ]

That never works. They are still my dry cleaners, who the hell introduces someone to their dry cleaners.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Take a friend in and introduce him. "This is John." They introduce themselves to him and you find out the name.

[/ QUOTE ]

That never works. They are still my dry cleaners, who the hell introduces someone to their dry cleaners.

[/ QUOTE ]

Who the hell gives their dry cleaners a christmas card?

[tonypaladino]

You just gotta get someone else to go in and find out their names.

[dtbog]

[ QUOTE ]

What the hell should I do?

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd probably just ask.

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
you sound sweet, just ask them. i don't think it will hurt their feelings, but i would look for a business card first /images/graemlins/grin.gif.

[/ QUOTE ]

Thanks, but I'm actually a huge [censored]. No business card; asking them is the only way I guess?

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
You just gotta get someone else to go in and find out their names.

[/ QUOTE ]

This actually hasn't occurred to me before.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
you sound sweet, just ask them. i don't think it will hurt their feelings, but i would look for a business card first /images/graemlins/grin.gif.

[/ QUOTE ]

Thanks, but I'm actually a huge [censored]. No business card; asking them is the only way I guess?

[/ QUOTE ]

Noooooooo! We'll think of something elaborate! Much more fun. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[tonypaladino]

Your post sort of reminded me of this,
\
Area Liberal Worried His Asian Dry Cleaner Doesn't Like Him (http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28011/print/)

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Your post sort of reminded me of this,
\
Area Liberal Worried His Asian Dry Cleaner Doesn't Like Him (http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28011/print/)

[/ QUOTE ]

ha

Gold Jerry, Gold!

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
You just gotta get someone else to go in and find out their names.

[/ QUOTE ]

This actually hasn't occurred to me before.

[/ QUOTE ]

Send in another Asian guy to pretend to be a long lost relative. They'll tell him their name.

[IndieMatty]

You still have time to delete this.

[dtbog]

[ QUOTE ]
"Maybe she's mad about my tags," Bern said. "A lot of my stuff says 'Made In China' or 'Made In Hong Kong,' and I know that a lot of those places run sweatshops. I'd feel awful if she thought I was supporting the exploitation of her people."

[/ QUOTE ]

LOL

[jakethebake]

Maybe you could call the landlord and ask the name of the people renting that space?

[Los Feliz Slim]

Just ask. Make light of it. "This is crazy, but over all these years you guys have never told me your names!"

[jakethebake]

Or ask the people that run the stores next to them?

[ QUOTE ]
who the hell introduces someone to their dry cleaners.

[/ QUOTE ]

i laughed out loud at that

[jakethebake]

I've got it! Follow them home at night and read the name on the mailbox!

[ QUOTE ]

Who the hell gives their dry cleaners a christmas card?

[/ QUOTE ]

bwahaha, i laughed out loud at that too

[diebitter]

I have this same situation with my barber - but reversed. I've been going there about 10 years, and take my sons now, and he knows their names, but I'm sure he doesn't know mine.

[Leo99]

Are you sure they're Chinese, not Korean?

[mslif]

[ QUOTE ]
You just gotta get someone else to go in and find out their names.

[/ QUOTE ]

That seems like the best answer so far.
Otherwise you could always apologize and tell them that you cannot remember their names. Afterall we are talking about a whole family here, not just you.

[jakethebake]

Just call them Lee. You've got a 50/50 shot.

Take the coin flip and address the card to the Wangs.

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Are you sure they're Chinese, not Korean?

[/ QUOTE ]

Not entirely; but the sign on the front says Chinese Laundry.

whoa, basically same post as yours at the same time. weird.

[xadrez]

get drunk, call them /images/graemlins/confused.gif

Mainland or Taiwan?

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Just ask. Make light of it. "This is crazy, but over all these years you guys have never told me your names!"

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah this is the default I guess. I'm leaning this way.

[lucas9000]

over the next couple of weeks/months, try this:

if the father is helping you out, try to bring up one of the other family members in your brief conversation. when you do, say something like "so i told your daughter, what's her name again?, blah blah blah." then, you get the daughter's name, and it just looks like the name slipped your mind (or at worst you only forgot her name). repeat this on subsequent trips, but for different family members. if you go twice a week, you've got plenty of time to find out all the names by christmas, and over that span of time no red flags will come up (hopefully).

[Shajen]

perfect spot for the "crop duster"

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
perfect spot for the "crop duster"

[/ QUOTE ]\

This is the first time I've chuckled at this. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Mainland or Taiwan?

[/ QUOTE ]

Why are we looking them up in the phonebook? /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[Shajen]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
perfect spot for the "crop duster"

[/ QUOTE ]\

This is the first time I've chuckled at this. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

1 time out of 150 isn't bad.

/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
over the next couple of weeks/months, try this:

if the father is helping you out, try to bring up one of the other family members in your brief conversation. when you do, say something like "so i told your daughter, what's her name again?, blah blah blah." then, you get the daughter's name, and it just looks like the name slipped your mind (or at worst you only forgot her name). repeat this on subsequent trips, but for different family members. if you go twice a week, you've got plenty of time to find out all the names by christmas, and over that span of time no red flags will come up (hopefully).

[/ QUOTE ]

Once in a while, Friday mornings,the grandfather is alone, all the other times they are all in there together. This place is just a drop off joing too, so its just one small room with a lot of storage in the back. Good idea though.

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Mainland or Taiwan?

[/ QUOTE ]

Why are we looking them up in the phonebook? /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Do you want my help or not? Get me the answer.

[dblgutshot]

Did they tell you their names and you just forgot, or did they never formally introduce everyone?

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Mainland or Taiwan?

[/ QUOTE ]

Why are we looking them up in the phonebook? /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Do you want my help or not? Get me the answer.

[/ QUOTE ]

I have no idea. Can you ask someone who's name you don't know, that sort of thing?

[dcasper70]

Would the local Chamber Of Commerce be helpful at all???

Also, you could ask the mail delivery person. They know everyone, it's scary...

Or you could just ask them, you pansy. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Did they tell you their names and you just forgot, or did they never formally introduce everyone?

[/ QUOTE ]

They have never told me their names. They only know mine, because you write it at the top of the ticket (now they write it for me); I also should mention I see them on the street/subway too...thats the worst.

I know I should have asked them their names years ago, but I put it off, not it's just getting more and more awkward.

[dblgutshot]

asking them is the best way IMO. Chinese people often will have a different name on their business cards or their permits than what they tell strangers or what they tell friends.

Or just call them auntie and uncle.

Since they never told you their names, I'd just ask outright.

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Would the local Chamber Of Commerce be helpful at all???

Also, you could ask the mail delivery person. They know everyone, it's scary...

Or you could just ask them, you pansy. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

ACTUALLY! If we have the same mailman, this may work...Great idea!!

[dcasper70]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Would the local Chamber Of Commerce be helpful at all???

Also, you could ask the mail delivery person. They know everyone, it's scary...

Or you could just ask them, you pansy. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

ACTUALLY! If we have the same mailman, this may work...Great idea!!

[/ QUOTE ]

If you're successful with the mailman, keep in mind that their mailing name may not be what you want to address them as. Some regions of China mix up what we consider to be first/middle/last names.

You could just ask them, you pansy. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

Edit: Don't worry, the mailman has all the answers.

[sfer]

To Mulva...

[ddubois]

[ QUOTE ]
occasionally a little 7-10 yr old girl (who has a crush on me)

[/ QUOTE ]
SIIHP

[stinkypete]

they know you don't know their names. they're more likely to think you're crazy if you just suddenly start calling them by their names after you've gotten someone else to find out for you than if you just ask them.

[maxpower72]

Maybe it's just me but isn't SIIHP for a 7 to 10 year old girl crossing the line?

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Maybe it's just me but isn't SIIHP for a 7 to 10 year old girl crossing the line?

[/ QUOTE ]

It is, worse is that it's not funny!

I now have my first Ignore.

[Twitch1977]

Call the department in the city that hands out business licences, the name of the owner of a business should be public domain and something they can tell you.

T

[ibankonu]

If their daughter is really that young, you could easily ask her at least the names of her parents and grandparents, if not get her name as well, without offending her at all. I mean, why not ask the little girl?

[Benal]

[ QUOTE ]
What the hell should I do?

[/ QUOTE ]

Are you serious? You actually need advice on how to ask someone what their name is? What's next, "How should I answer the phone?"

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
What the hell should I do?

[/ QUOTE ]

Are you serious? You actually need advice on how to ask someone what their name is? What's next, "How should I answer the phone?"

[/ QUOTE ]

You're right this isn't a different or odd situation at all.

[diebitter]

Ok, nothing to do with the OP's question, but funny dry cleaner story.

I was with a medical student friend, who'd been to a fancy ball, hired a tux, got lucky and scored with some floozy in a big dress, shagged her, and got, er, stains on the trousers.

I went with him to the dry cleaners and when he laid them out in front of a shop full of customers queuing, and the assistant casually asked him what the stain was, he said in the loudest possible voice, without a hint of jokiness, shame or anything, 'IT'S JISM!'

A stunned silence followed (well, it is England), and the shop keeper scurried off, red-faced, while the rest of the people just stayed completely and utterly silent.

[The Yugoslavian]

What would you do in a similar but reversed situation?

Personally, I'd think the whole thing was pretty hilarious and a great thing to joke about in future conversations. It also makes a decent story. I'd also feel just as awkward about not offering my name in the last several years.

If anything, I think it would strengthen your relationship with the family.

Also, there definitely is a chance they are thinking the same thing. They may all sit around and wonder 'Matt doesn't know our names but we don't want to insult him by just telling him assuming he doesn't know....I mean, it's been a few years.'

Yugoslav

[ddubois]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Maybe it's just me but isn't SIIHP for a 7 to 10 year old girl crossing the line?

[/ QUOTE ]

It is, worse is that it's not funny!

[/ QUOTE ]
It's way, way over - That's why it's funny!

[ QUOTE ]
I now have my first Ignore.

[/ QUOTE ]
That's ok, I still like you.

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Maybe it's just me but isn't SIIHP for a 7 to 10 year old girl crossing the line?

[/ QUOTE ]

It is, worse is that it's not funny!

[/ QUOTE ]
It's way, way over - That's why it's funny!

[ QUOTE ]
I now have my first Ignore.

[/ QUOTE ]
That's ok, I still like you.

[/ QUOTE ]

Bah. I can't ignore anyone, its just not in me. And no SIIHP will never be funny.