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View Full Version : "I give really good blow jobs"


tonypaladino
10-01-2005, 03:06 PM
So I'm at a bar, and this girl I kinda know is talking to me and another girl, and out of nowhere, she turns to be and goes "I give really good blowjobs".

Now, at about that moment, another friend (female) pulled me away (physically) b/c she wanted me to meet a friend of hers she thought would want to hook up with me. (I /images/graemlins/heart.gif my friends btw)

Now, I was thinkng about this later on. I really have no idea what to say from there. So tell me what you would do. What's your course of action from "I give really good blowjobs".

Thanks
TONY

Victor
10-01-2005, 03:07 PM
ummm, "prove it."

ucfryan
10-01-2005, 03:08 PM
I'd go with "I like really good blow jobs."

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 03:10 PM
[ QUOTE ]
I'd go with "I like really good blow jobs."

[/ QUOTE ]

Either this or "prove it."

gildwulf
10-01-2005, 03:10 PM
"So do I".

PITTM
10-01-2005, 03:11 PM
[ QUOTE ]
I'd go with "I like really good blow jobs."

[/ QUOTE ]

tonypaladino
10-01-2005, 03:11 PM
[ QUOTE ]
"So do I".

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't think that one's such a good idea.

10-01-2005, 03:12 PM
"great I could use some pointers"

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 03:14 PM
"That's good to know, but do you take it in the pooper?"

10-01-2005, 03:16 PM
refer to the "stop being a pussy thread"

tonypaladino
10-01-2005, 03:19 PM
[ QUOTE ]
refer to the "stop being a pussy thread"

[/ QUOTE ]

How does that apply?

Like anyone, I don't always say the right thing when caught completely off-guard.

I'm not relying on 00t for sex advice. I'm just curious about what others would do.

oh, and STFU n00b.

10-01-2005, 03:24 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
refer to the "stop being a pussy thread"

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm just curious about what others would do.



[/ QUOTE ]

No you're not loser, you're bragging about something that prolly never occured. Ohhhhhhh your e-penis is big! Good job.

tonypaladino
10-01-2005, 03:26 PM
[ QUOTE ]
You are now ignoring this user. You will no longer see the body of any of their posts.

[/ QUOTE ]

tonypaladino
10-01-2005, 03:28 PM
Ok, I unignored you for a second, so I could see how you built up almost 100 posts in a few days, and saw that you've been a complete tool from the begining. You are my first ignore, and I'm glad I did it.

ekky
10-01-2005, 03:31 PM
I'd laugh condescendingly, and give off a slight chuckle. She will be a skocked, and mildly curious. At this stage she will ask you what you are laughing at, and then I would say.. "most people who say they give good head, usually give the worst head"

She will of course take this as an affront to her skills, and be more inclined to *prove it*.

saying *prove it* is what she would expect... therefore she would be less likely to do so

tonypaladino
10-01-2005, 03:33 PM
[ QUOTE ]
I'd laugh condescendingly, and give off a slight chuckle. She will be a skocked, and mildly curious. At this stage she will ask you what you are laughing at, and then I would say.. "most people who say they give good head, usually give the worst head"

I like this.

She will of course take this as an affront to her skills, and be more inclined to *prove it*.

saying *prove it* is what she would expect... therefore she would be less likely to do so

[/ QUOTE ]

10-01-2005, 03:34 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Ok, I unignored you for a second, so I could see how you built up almost 100 posts in a few days, and saw that you've been a complete tool from the begining. You are my first ignore, and I'm glad I did it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yawwwwwn

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 03:34 PM
[ QUOTE ]
saying *prove it* is what she would expect... therefore she would be less likely to do so

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm sure she does expect him to say prove it. And I'm betting she will. Girls that go around saying things like that to strangers in bars are generally pretty easy.

theben
10-01-2005, 03:34 PM
"prove it"

tonypaladino
10-01-2005, 03:40 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
saying *prove it* is what she would expect... therefore she would be less likely to do so

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm sure she does expect him to say prove it. And I'm betting she will. Girls that go around saying things like that to strangers in bars are generally pretty easy.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not a stranger. she's a former co-worker

Blarg
10-01-2005, 03:43 PM
My course of action is probably similar to yours -- just at that very moment, of all times possible, getting pulled away by a "friend" to help siphon off some of her social obligations by having to entertain her goofball ugly friend or cousin or look like a rude jackass for brushing her off or not hanging around. You know, the one with the "great personality."

Then coming home pissed off and sans blowjobs and typing up stupid stuff on OOT at 2 a.m. with way too many beers in my gut.

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 03:44 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'm sure she does expect him to say prove it. And I'm betting she will. Girls that go around saying things like that to former coworkers in bars are generally pretty easy.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not a stranger. she's a former co-worker

[/ QUOTE ]

Fine. FMP.

PoBoy321
10-01-2005, 03:49 PM
This is a completely read dependent situation. Since you're getting pulled away at that moment, I think "You'll have to show me later" would be the best response, because it's already establishing the fact that you're going to get together later. If you just said "prove it," and walked away, you apparently aren't all that interested in her proving it, otherwise you'd stay.

Los Feliz Slim
10-01-2005, 03:51 PM
"That may be true, but do you give really good blow jobs in the bathrooms of bars?"

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 03:52 PM
[ QUOTE ]
"That may be true, but do you give really good blow jobs in the bathrooms of bars?"

[/ QUOTE ]

Very good. I like this one.

chesspain
10-01-2005, 03:53 PM
I'ld say "I really enjoy receiving good blow jobs."

meleader2
10-01-2005, 04:00 PM
[ QUOTE ]
I'd laugh condescendingly, and give off a slight chuckle. She will be a skocked, and mildly curious. At this stage she will ask you what you are laughing at, and then I would say.. "most people who say they give good head, usually give the worst head"

She will of course take this as an affront to her skills, and be more inclined to *prove it*.

saying *prove it* is what she would expect... therefore she would be less likely to do so

[/ QUOTE ]

i like this. it's a perfect use of the Neg Hit. don't stress on it though, unless she's real hot because she probably already has low self esteem.

BottlesOf
10-01-2005, 04:00 PM
From what I've noticed the girls who say they give really good blow jobs, are generally mediocre at it.

PoBoy321
10-01-2005, 04:02 PM
[ QUOTE ]
From what I've noticed the girls who say they give really good blow jobs, are generally mediocre at it.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is very true. I've noticed that the girls who give the best head tend to be kind of insecure, so a girl who says she gives good head is likely too confident to do it well.

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 04:02 PM
[ QUOTE ]
From what I've noticed the girls who say they give really good blow jobs, are generally mediocre at it.

[/ QUOTE ]

I've received plenty of blowjobs, but have not had many girls tell me this so I think my sample size is too small. For what its worth though, the best blowjob I ever got was from a girl that told me this. She really knew her way around a penis.

Good times. /images/graemlins/heart.gif

TheCroShow
10-01-2005, 04:03 PM
the line "prove it" has worked in the past

LeatherFace
10-01-2005, 04:05 PM
"So does your mom."

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 04:07 PM
How about "Yeah. I've heard that about you."

Aytumious
10-01-2005, 04:22 PM
[ QUOTE ]
How about "Yeah. I've heard that about you."

[/ QUOTE ]

LMAO

PoBoy321
10-01-2005, 04:25 PM
[ QUOTE ]

How about "Yeah. I've heard that about you. But your mom does that thing with her tongue. "

[/ QUOTE ]

Blarg
10-01-2005, 04:30 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
From what I've noticed the girls who say they give really good blow jobs, are generally mediocre at it.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is very true. I've noticed that the girls who give the best head tend to be kind of insecure, so a girl who says she gives good head is likely too confident to do it well.

[/ QUOTE ]

There's something to this. I think some women figure being good looking is more closely correlated to being good in bed than it is, and that being cute around your pecker is somehow related to being good at BJ's. Someone less into their image and willing to just do the "job" of giving good head is better at it.

Bluffoon
10-01-2005, 04:30 PM
"Lets get out of here"

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 04:31 PM
"Do you need a refill on that drink?"

Toro
10-01-2005, 04:40 PM
Tell her "I'm from Missouri".

StevieG
10-01-2005, 04:53 PM
[ QUOTE ]
"That may be true, but do you give really good blow jobs in the bathrooms of bars?"

[/ QUOTE ]

winner

PokerBob
10-01-2005, 04:54 PM
[ QUOTE ]
So I'm at a bar, and this girl I kinda know is talking to me and another girl, and out of nowhere, she turns to be and goes "I give really good blowjobs".

Now, at about that moment, another friend (female) pulled me away (physically) b/c she wanted me to meet a friend of hers she thought would want to hook up with me. (I /images/graemlins/heart.gif my friends btw)

Now, I was thinkng about this later on. I really have no idea what to say from there. So tell me what you would do. What's your course of action from "I give really good blowjobs".

Thanks
TONY

[/ QUOTE ]

lem45216
10-01-2005, 04:57 PM
"i thoroughly doubt that"

This effectivly says prove it, without you actually saying prove it. It'll definitely catch her off guard and forces her to say "omg i soooo do!" to which you say "no" again and then she gets quite irate and pretty much forces you to accept her blow job to prove you wrong, and it'd probably be better than the one you'd recieve if you just replied with 'prove it'.
Thats my view anyhow.

mslif
10-01-2005, 04:58 PM
How much?

Seriously though, if a girl needs to tell a guy that you give good blow jobs to get his attention, that's not a good sign. There is something to be said for subtility. As previously mentioned in this thread, most people who brag about their skills, especially in bed, are the mediocre ones.

KaneKungFu123
10-01-2005, 05:04 PM
my standard line is, i have to go to the atm.

Sifmole
10-01-2005, 05:44 PM
I had a girl in college tell me, "They don't call me BJ for nothing." Her name was Belinda something....

I responded w/ "lets get dinner". She turned out to be quite adept later that evening.

Benal
10-01-2005, 05:51 PM
Did she look like this?

http://img392.imageshack.us/img392/3102/untitled1by.jpg

eastbay
10-01-2005, 05:54 PM
The correct answer is "Wanna make a movie?"

eastbay

jakethebake
10-01-2005, 05:54 PM
There can really never be too many blowjob threads. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

BeerMoney
10-01-2005, 06:04 PM
That's a very special woman in that picture.

Dantes
10-01-2005, 06:10 PM
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LeatherFace
10-01-2005, 06:24 PM
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MonkeeMan
10-01-2005, 06:47 PM
"Mmm, my imagination is running wild. You can't just leave me dangling now, can you?"

theben
10-01-2005, 06:51 PM
so do i

TheHip41
10-01-2005, 06:59 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
saying *prove it* is what she would expect... therefore she would be less likely to do so

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm sure she does expect him to say prove it. And I'm betting she will. Girls that go around saying things like that to strangers in bars are generally pretty easy.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not a stranger. she's a former co-worker

[/ QUOTE ]

sue her for sexual harassment

Stuey
10-01-2005, 07:50 PM
[ QUOTE ]
"I give really good blow jobs"

[/ QUOTE ]

Well I'm a paying customer so you better out do yourself yah hear?

gorie
10-01-2005, 08:00 PM
you should say "really ? it's too bad you're so ugly." slap the table to imply laughter, pause a second, then hold your hand up and say "high-five"

10-01-2005, 08:02 PM
[ QUOTE ]
you should say "really ? it's too bad you're so ugly." slap the table to imply laughter, pause a second, then hold your hand up and say "high-five"

[/ QUOTE ]

Gorie. Is. Awesome!!! /images/graemlins/heart.gif /images/graemlins/heart.gif /images/graemlins/heart.gif

speirs
10-01-2005, 08:03 PM
blow me

Slow Play Ray
10-01-2005, 08:04 PM
I would have said "yeah, I know" and refused to answer any of her questions afterwards.

Blarg
10-01-2005, 09:01 PM
How about, "Blow jobs are SOOOOOO 90's. I'm into poopers now."

PokerBob
10-01-2005, 09:03 PM
[ QUOTE ]
you should say "really ? it's too bad you're so ugly." slap the table to imply laughter, pause a second, then hold your hand up and say "high-five"

[/ QUOTE ]

lol

silkyslim
10-01-2005, 09:31 PM
dont make out with her

djoyce003
10-01-2005, 09:33 PM
i've never been disappointed when a girl told me this at the hummer I later received.

Unabridged
10-01-2005, 09:53 PM
"thats great, but how are your rimjobs?"

MarkL444
10-01-2005, 10:02 PM
[ QUOTE ]
ummm, "prove it."

[/ QUOTE ]

this is the best

Leo99
10-01-2005, 10:26 PM
Take her by the arm and walk her out of the bar to your car. She will probably ask where you're taking her. Tell her that you want her to prove it. Ask her if she likes to swallow.

PokerBob
10-01-2005, 10:27 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Take her by the arm and walk her out of the bar to your car. She will probably ask where you're taking her. Tell her that you want her to prove it. Tell her she likes to swallow.

[/ QUOTE ]

fyp

battschr
10-01-2005, 10:34 PM
What a coincidence, I'm GREAT at receiving blow jobs!

masse75
10-01-2005, 11:37 PM
Ask her if she'll toss your salad as a bonus.

MyTurn2Raise
10-01-2005, 11:49 PM
[ QUOTE ]
"i thoroughly doubt that"

This effectivly says prove it, without you actually saying prove it. It'll definitely catch her off guard and forces her to say "omg i soooo do!" to which you say "no" again and then she gets quite irate and pretty much forces you to accept her blow job to prove you wrong, and it'd probably be better than the one you'd recieve if you just replied with 'prove it'.
Thats my view anyhow.

[/ QUOTE ]

agreed...act as though it's your right to the blowjob, not that you're desperate to get it

tonypaladino
10-02-2005, 01:38 AM
I'm very happy with the way this thread turned out.

Thank you OOT

Jeff W
10-02-2005, 01:40 AM
[ QUOTE ]
What's your course of action from "I give really good blowjobs".

[/ QUOTE ]

I give really good facials.

tonypaladino
10-02-2005, 01:42 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
What's your course of action from "I give really good blowjobs".

[/ QUOTE ]

I give really good facials.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wicked

fluxrad
10-02-2005, 01:43 AM
I write really good thank you notes.

LethalRose
10-02-2005, 01:43 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
What's your course of action from "I give really good blowjobs".

[/ QUOTE ]

I give really good facials.

[/ QUOTE ]

best answer so far.

id say something like "thate nice, and you want me to know this why?"

fluxrad
10-02-2005, 01:48 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
What's your course of action from "I give really good blowjobs".

[/ QUOTE ]

I give really good facials.

[/ QUOTE ]

Best comedic answer. Not likely to get you blown.

Vish
10-02-2005, 01:50 AM
[ QUOTE ]
There's something to this. I think some women figure being good looking is more closely correlated to being good in bed than it is, and that being cute around your pecker is somehow related to being good at BJ's. Someone less into their image and willing to just do the "job" of giving good head is better at it.

[/ QUOTE ]

It's so weird hearing you talk about blowjobs. It's not what you're saying--it's just that it feels like my grandfather is talking about them.

Jeff W
10-02-2005, 01:53 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

I give really good facials.

[/ QUOTE ]

Best comedic answer. Not likely to get you blown.

[/ QUOTE ]

Unless I have a read on the girl, I assume she's a cocktease.

fluxrad
10-02-2005, 01:59 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

I give really good facials.

[/ QUOTE ]

Best comedic answer. Not likely to get you blown.

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Unless I have a read on the girl, I assume she's a cocktease.

[/ QUOTE ]

I assume the "What's your course of action" part of the question involves more "how do I get a blowjob out of this" than "how do I appear funny to everyone listening."

I'm not saying your answer isn't awesome. I'm just saying I think there's a significantly more zen way to approach this. You know, WWBD?

What Would Bukkake Do?

Blarg
10-02-2005, 02:01 AM
Heheheh!

tonypaladino
10-02-2005, 02:01 AM
[ QUOTE ]


I assume the "What's your course of action" part of the question involves more "how do I get a blowjob out of this" than "how do I appear funny to everyone listening."


[/ QUOTE ]

Good point.

No one else was listening who I gave a crap about would be listening that I'd try to get a laugh. But getting the girl to laugh might be a good move too.

diebitter
10-02-2005, 02:02 AM
I completely missed the point of this thread. I thought TonyP. was announcing something about himself to the world.

TimM
10-02-2005, 02:02 AM
"Oh... Yeah, lots of girls think that."

tonypaladino
10-02-2005, 02:03 AM
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I completely missed the point of this thread. I thought TonyP. was announcing something about himself to the world.

[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/confused.gif

diebitter
10-02-2005, 02:04 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I completely missed the point of this thread. I thought TonyP. was announcing something about himself to the world.

[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm pulling your chain a little!

I'm saying you're announcing 'I give...'

Heh, those guys that say explaining a joke makes it less funny are spot on.

For the record, YAOIMB

tonypaladino
10-02-2005, 02:07 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I completely missed the point of this thread. I thought TonyP. was announcing something about himself to the world.

[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm pulling your chain a little!

I'm saying you're announcing 'I give...'

Heh, those guys that say explaining a joke makes it less funny are spot on.

For the record, YAOIMB

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh I get it.

That's why I made sure to put it in quotes. I didn't want to give anyone any ideas. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Blarg
10-02-2005, 02:10 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]


I assume the "What's your course of action" part of the question involves more "how do I get a blowjob out of this" than "how do I appear funny to everyone listening."


[/ QUOTE ]

Good point.

No one else was listening who I gave a crap about would be listening that I'd try to get a laugh. But getting the girl to laugh might be a good move too.

[/ QUOTE ]

Often either a deal-sealer or a deal-breaker. Risky maneuver.

For instance:

[ QUOTE ]

Her: I give really great blowjobs!
You: To people? Cuz I've got my dog out in the car ...


[/ QUOTE ]

might just get you a drink in your face.